TO FACE THE PAST
PART 2
By María Laura Gambero
January  - 2002
 
~~ ONE  ~~

Ben Cartwright silently gave silent thanks that winter was getting to its end.  It had been one of the coldest and cruelest winters he could remember. A terrible snowstorm harassed Virginia City and its surroundings for almost two weeks causing lots of troubles.  In a matter of hours a thick white carpet covered every inch of roads and land and the ranchers were forced to remain locked in their own houses.

Ben came out of the house carrying a cup of coffee in his right hand. In a few weeks spring would arrive and the weather was getting warmer as days passed. Ben scanned the yard smiling as he contemplated the trees and the flowers beginning to bloom. It’s so nice to see colors around here he thought as he remembered the surroundings of the house covered with white.  Ben sipped his coffee and walked to the table placed at the porch.  He sat and took a deep breath enjoying the silence, broken only from time to time by the singing of the birds.

His thoughts turned towards his boys.  Since the snowstorm passed, they were busy repairing the damages caused by the bad weather.  At first they took care of the barn, the stable and the corral.  The three of them working together after being locked in at home for so long, was too much for them, and problems were quick to arise. Joe and Adam had been on edge spoiling for a fight most of the time, and the tension increased from the strain around the house.  Joe struggled to accept
Adam’s return as he had when Adam returned from college.  Once again, he discovered a different man than the one who had left them years ago.  Ben sighed.  Maybe he was also frustrated because he was not able to help Adam.         

Adam.  During the last months, his eldest son was buried in his thoughts most of the time and nearly talked to none of them.  Except when Joseph pushed him into an argument.  Ben shook his head.  He could bet that Adam was analyzing what he had said that night at the barn and it was hard for him to admit that sharing his feelings with his family was the best for him.  Slowly, after many years of loneliness, Adam was learning to trust his feelings with the family again.  

Ben was aware that Adam’s behavior was increasing Joe’s anger and frustration.  Fortunately I have Hoss to help me handle those two.  Ben thought about his huge son and frowned as he realized that Hoss´s gentle sweet nature had been slowly covered by a shadow of weariness. Poor Hoss, I guess he’s getting tired of being the peacemaker between that pair.  Ben realized while he sipped his coffee.

It had been a hard winter for all of them and Ben and Molly needed their peace as well. So when the weather got better, he sent the three boys to attend to different matters.

Adam was repairing the north fence. Ben had decided to send him to spend a few days on his own.  It could help Adam to camp while he mended the fence.  A few days alone will give him the chance to get in good terms with himself. He is going to be fine, I know.

Hoss was repairing the south fence.  Even Hoss had been affected by the tense atmosphere of the house and needed to be away from his brothers. Nothing better for him than being surrounded by Nature and our beautiful land.  

Little Joe. Ben sighed and smiled as he thought about his youngest. Joe needed to get out of the house and away from the ranch more than anyone. For him, being confined to the ranch for so long was almost asphyxiating. He was losing the ability to control his temper. Joe was in Sacramento attending a lumber contract.  After
Adam’s departure, Joe took his brother’s place attending meetings and dealing contracts.  He became a smart businessman and Ben was proud of his little boy. He is a man already, he remind himself. Well he will always be my little boy. Ben smiled. That contract was a good excuse to send him to spend a week in Sacramento, where Joe could certainly enjoy himself. He will have some fun in Sacramento.  Ben thought and finished his coffee.   A few more days here and I don’t know if anyone could bear it.  Ben shook his head and took a deep breath as he realized that springtime was arriving on time.

Matt ran out of the house and smiled as he saw his grandpa at the porch.

“ Hey grandpa” the boy said sweetly amusingly. “ Are we going to Virginia City?” he demanded. “ Remember you promise.”

Ben left the cup on the table and lifted his grandson.

“ Of course I remember,” he said gently. “ You know, I sent your father to work away so I can spend these days with you.  How many days do we have left ahead of us?” he asked with a smile.

“ Daddy will be here in two days,” Matt answered with intelligently. Ben smiled as Matt’s face reminded him about the little boy that was by his side while he was crossing the country following his dream.

“ Yes baby, your daddy will be here on Saturday,” Ben said and kissed his cheek.  “ He must be missing you a lot. Are you missing him?”

“ Yeah.  But I’m having a very good time with you and Molly” he told him with a huge smile.

“ Let’s go to Virginia City.  Roy told me that he has a surprise waiting for you”

“ Really?” Matt asked with wide opened eyes.

“ Really” Ben answered and laughed.

Ben left Matt on the ground and hand-by-hand they walked into the house.

~~ TWO ~~

Taking advantages of Ben and Matt’s trip to Virginia City, Molly rode Handsome, her horse, towards the lake. It was a wonderful day for a ride.  The sun shone up in the clean sky. The Ponderosa’s pines waved rhythmically as if they were dancing with the fresh breeze that spread the delicate scent of the trees and wild flowers. 
Handsome´s gallop and the awaking of Nature were the only sounds that broke the silence.  

Mentally Molly thanked Ben for taking Matt to Virginia City with him, so she could face her deepest feelings.  She knew Ben realized that she needed to do so. Molly smiled as she thought about Matt.  Matthew Cartwright would be four years old in less than three months.  He was becoming a quick smart boy who needed to be watched; otherwise he could disappear with great ease. Molly smiled while she wondered how Ben would manage to attend his business and kept an eye on his grandson at the same time.

Molly arrived at the lake.  She took a deep breath and dismounted Handsome. She tied her horse to a branch and moved near the shore.  She sat on the edge of a rock and scanned the place, feeling that she was visiting a grave; her grave, because in a certain way her past life had died there.  She could feel the tears gathering in her eyes and she didn’t try to contain them.  Every year, on the anniversary of her arrival at the Ponderosa, the same thing happened. Molly narrowed her eyes and looked at the woods where Hoss had found her four years ago, and during all that time not even a single memory came to her. However she showed the Cartwrights that she had overcome what happened to her, but deep in her soul she was sad regarding her lack of memories and the realization that she didn’t even know who she really was.

As years had passed Molly forced herself to believe that there was nothing good to remember. So her mind pushed her to accept the opportunity that destiny was giving her to build a new life.  Molly dropped her face into her hands and allowed herself to cry. Always the same, year after year.  She stopped crying, as she had no more tears.  She took a deep breath and wiped her face with both hands.  Molly straightened and scanned the beautiful view letting a sad smile appear on her lips.  All she could see reminded her about the Cartwrights, and how much she loved them.  Ben with his wise words, his soft caring voice and those velvet tender eyes easily pushed away all her fears and distress.  Then, there was Hoss, the one that saved her life.  The giant man with huge gentle heart, comforting blue eyes and sweet smile.  And Little Joe.  He was the one that cheered her up, making her laugh with his witty comments and suggestions.  Joe was so full of life that she couldn’t avoid getting caught up by his charm and passionate way of living.

Molly knew they considered her part of their family.  The three of them had given her the support and the strength she needed to go on with her life. As Ben treated her as the daughter he never had and Joe and Hoss kept an eye on her as if she was their little princess.

Thinking about them Molly felt that bitterness turned into blessedness.  But her smile disappeared as she thought about the other member of the family.  Adam Cartwright was something quite different and Molly couldn’t think about him the same way.  She had her own share of suffering regarding Adam. Once more, she remembered that morning when he had kissed her. Molly kept the memory in her heart as a treasure, but her illusions fell apart day by day as long as Adam treated her as if nothing had ever happened between them.  Molly sighed as she remembered what she felt surrounded by his strong arms; the trembling, when their lips met and how her heart melted when he looked into her eyes.  For a brief moment she had felt his love, his passion and she allowed herself to dream.  She had waited hopefully for his approach; a word, a glance or something to let her know that he cared, but instead, Adam was far more distant than ever and it was very painful for her to realize that she had misunderstood him.

 “ Stop it” Molly ordered herself feeling the tears gathering in her eyes again, while she forced herself to remember Adam telling her that he would never love her.  “
Of course he used charming words to say it,” Molly said sadly, but the message was the same. Molly bit her lower lip as a chill crossed her heart.  She knew perfectly well that she had to stop thinking about Adam Cartwright, and that loving him would only cause her more suffering.  I can’t go on thinking about Adam as if he is the only man around here, she thought as she wiped the tears that finally fell.  Turn the page Molly…

Molly took a deep breath, feeling the lump in his throat grow. She had to think about something. Maybe I have to turn my attention to other men she wondered. She raised her eyes and watched the lake dreamily. She remembered that Joe had told her that the owners of the hotel organized a Ball to honor an illustrated painter that was staying in Virginia City. “ Maybe…” she wondered, but she knew that it would be hard to take Adam out of her heart and soul, and Molly wasn’t sure that she really wanted that to happen.

Molly rose and walked towards Handsome.  She mounted her horse and started on her way back to the ranch.

~~ THREE~~

It was getting dark when Adam finally reached home.  As he saw the house a smile appeared on his lips.  How wonderful is to know that my family is waiting for me behind that door, he thought feeling himself alive.  He was pretty tired and his entire body was aching after three nights sleeping on the ground. He could barely sleep because of the cold and the uncomfortable bedroll. I guess I’m unused to this; I didn’t sleep on the ground for years. But those nights with the stars as the only company gave Adam the opportunity to think and face his feelings. He forced himself to think about the strange meeting at the barn.  It was difficult for him to understand how he could lose his usual self-control.  It was also hard to believe, even to himself that he had so much hidden inside.  He had never though about it before that but as soon as the words came out of his mouth, he recognized his feelings and also realized that his beaten angry soul took advantage of his weakness and was speaking out loud, out of control. Most of what he had said that night was true and after sharing it with his family, he was feeling much better.  In fact, he was feeling good.  Adam was fully aware that his family was being extremely patient with him; even Joe struggled to control his temper.  Adam knew perfectly well that above his typical disagreements with his little brother. This time Joe was angry only because he couldn’t find the way to help him.  Adam knew it and he reminded himself that he had to talk with Joe; he owed him that.   He also thought about Molly, her presence in the house still disturbed him very much, but in a different way. 
That morning, when he kissed her, he had felt the attraction and he couldn’t resist it. He had kissed her and lost himself in their kisses. But that was love?, he wondered. He was not sure yet and he was not ready to jeopardize himself. Everything is fine this way. Step by step, Adam. Don’t spoil it off.

He dismounted Sport and tied him to the front post.  He glanced at the door eagerly and smiled.  His thoughts were full of Matt’s face at that moment and he couldn’t wait to have his son in his arms.  He had missed him so much that he wondered how his Pa handled his feelings when he left his little boys in order to built his dream of The Ponderosa. A case of need I guess. Never mind, I want to see my son now.  Adam strode across the porch and opened the door abruptly.
Hoss and Joe were playing one of their usual checkers matches, when Adam came in.  They both turned at him as soon as they heard the door opening.

“ Hey Adam you finally arrived, man,” said Joe with teasing tone.

Ben approached his eldest son from his desk.  He slapped Adam’s shoulder and noticed the dust that came from his shirt.  Adam greeted him and glanced around the main room eagerly.  Ben smiled knowing what he was looking for and told him that Matt was in the kitchen helping Hop Sing and Molly with the dinner. Adam’s smile grew and after thanked his father, he strode towards the kitchen.

A couple of minutes later he came back to the main room carrying Matt in his arms.  The boy dropped his head against Adam’s shoulder and with one hand caressed his father’s dark hair.   

“ Did you behave yourself?” was asking Adam while he moved towards the blue chair. Matt smiled and nodded with proudly expression while his little hand caressed Adam’s shoulder. “ Are you sure?”

“ Sure daddy. Ask Grandpa” Matt suggested with wide-open eyes.  He turned at Ben with anxious gaze. “ Tell him Grandpa. Yesterday you said that I was a good boy.”

“ You are a wonderful boy” replied Ben and winked to Adam.

Matt nodded satisfied and looked at his father with angelic expression.  Adam laughed openly and hugged him full of love.  Something scraped Matt’s cheek and the boy frowned puzzled. He studied his father’s features and noticed the dark shadow that covered most of his face.  

“ Daddy, what happen to your face?” he asked puzzled. “ Why is so scratchy and dark?”

“ Well, that’s because I couldn’t shave myself for almost five days.” Adam explained tenderly. He rubbed his face and grinned. He lowered his eyes and looked at

Matt arching one eyebrow.  “ Do you like it this way?”

“ No. It’s ugly,” Matt answered and twisted his mouth. “I never saw you like this before.”
Adam laughed as he agreed with his son.  

“ Son, why don’t you wash yourself” Ben suggested softly. “ Dinner will be ready soon.”

Adam nodded and looked at Matt smiling.  “ Do you want to come with me so you can tell me what you have done with Grandpa and Molly.”

“ Sure daddy” Matt answered while he clung on his father’s neck.

Ben and his youngest sons watched them climbed the stairs with tender eyes.

“ How nice is to see him smiling again” thought Ben aloud.  Joe and Hoss turned their attention to Ben and smiled.  They both knew how concerned he was about Adam and how deeply their older brother’s words had touched him.

An hour later, Adam and Matt appeared at the top of the staircase.  Hand in hand, father and son came down, still talking about Matt’s activities during the past days.  Adam was wearing a black shirt and a pair of black clean trousers.  Although he hadn’t shaved himself he looked neat.

As soon as they reached the main room, Adam glanced around and noticed that the table was ready for dinner.  I’m starving. I certainly missed my bed and Hop Sings´s dishes. He smiled and watched Matt ran towards his uncles who were playing checkers.  He frowned as he noticed that Joe and Hoss were wearing their best suits.

“ Where are you going?” he asked while he sat on his blue chair and crossed his legs.

“ We are going to a ball,” Hoss answered with wide-open smile.

Adam raised one eyebrow and scanned Hoss´s face puzzled. “ You look real happy Hoss, what’s up?”

“ He is going with Molly, that’s why he is happy, isn’t it Uncle Hoss?” Matt said as he glanced at Hoss with intelligent eyes. Hoss nodded and ruffled his nephew’s hair.  Adam frowned wondering if he was missing something.

“ She asked Hoss,” commented Joe amusingly. “ Today she bought an incredible dress, Hoss. You are going to be the envy of the Ball.” Hoss laughed and nodded again proudly. Joe turned at Adam. “ Do you want to come with us brother?”

“ No way,” Adam answered sharply. “ Tonight I want to stay home with Matt and sleep without interruption.”

“ Hey Hoss, our older brother is getting old,” said Joe teasingly.

“ Wait till I have some sleep, little brother,”

Hop Sing that shouting called the Cartwrights to dinner interrupting the conversation.  Adam was the first one that stood up and walked towards the table carrying Matt in his arms. Ben and the boys followed him a few steps behind.  Adam seated Matt on his chair and began to fill his son’s plate with food. Suddenly the boy jumped from his chair. “ Look Molly, daddy is here” he shouted and ran to her. “ Wow Molly you are pretty.”

The four men turned at her.  Joe whistled marveled and elbowed Hoss.  They exchanged glances.  Ben smiled, pleased and nodded.  Adam stared at her speechlessly as Molly took his breath away.  My God, he thought as he could feel a trembling inside.  Molly was wearing a terrific green velvet dress that made her look incredibly sensual.  And Molly in that dress made Adam’s blood boil and his heart became a volcano ready to erupt.  His eyes briefly met Molly’s, but he turned them away noticing a sudden quickening on his pulse.  What the hell is happening to me, Adam wondered as his heart began to beat faster. Once more, he remembered what he felt when he had kissed her, and at that moment he wanted to kiss her again. Calm down Cartwright, he ordered himself and turned his attention back to Matt.

“ Hi Adam, I didn’t know you have already arrived,” Molly said while she passed next to him and gently touched his shoulder.

“ Hi Molly, ” answered Adam with a warm smile. “ You look very good in that dress.  Hoss told me that you are going to a Ball with him.”

Molly smiled at him and nodded while she sat next to Hoss.  Molly glanced around the table and noticed that all of them were staring at her. “ What is it?” she asked charmingly.  

“ You are incredibly beautiful, dear,” Ben said tenderly and fatherly as he passed a platter meal to Joe. “ Hoss you are going to have a tough time keeping suitors in on line.”

“ Unless Molly wants it the other way,” Joe commented in a teasing way, a crooked smile appeared in his face.  He finished filling his plate and passed the platter to Hoss. “ Why don’t you just tell us Molly?”

“ Well, Joe now that you mention it,” she began saying and paused only to glance around the table.  Matt and Adam were looking at her puzzled, while Hoss and Joe smiled amusingly. “ I want you to introduce me to your friends,” she said with mischievous look. ¨ I don’t want to be single all my life. I want to have my own family.”

Molly paused as a dreamy expression covered her face. “ Husband and children. I think its time to think about it, don’t you think so?”

Excuse me, what is she talking about, he thought while he sipped his wine. Stay aside Adam, but what the hell is happening here, he wondered without raising his eyes from his food. I was away for four days and she is thinking about a husband. One, two, three. Calm down Adam.

“ I think I have wasted enough time waiting,” Molly was saying. She paused and sipped her wine. “ I’m tired of waiting.”

Adam felt his annoyance turned into jealousy. Four, five, six. Calm down Cartwright, she is inviting you to step in. Step aside. Seven, eight, nine.

Adam’s snort caught the attention of everyone at the table. Joe and Hoss looked at him wondering what he had in mind. Molly frowned and stared at him confused. “

 What is it Adam?” she asked childishly and looked at him innocently. Well done, Adam. You are in.

“ I cannot believe that you are looking for a husband,” he said with sarcasm.

 “ May I ask you why not, Mr. Cartwright?” she asked dry and ironically. She took her wineglass and sipped her wine hiding her feelings.

“ You simply cannot go out and seek a husband,” Adam replied and she noticed a touch of irony in his voice. “ Don’t waste you time. You’ll know when the real man appears just in front of you.”

Molly’s eyes were fixed on Adam’s face “ Maybe, but I have wasted enough time waiting that man. You are the last one I met,” she answered defiantly. Adam was feeling uncomfortable with her comment, and was about to say something, but she didn’t allow him to do it. “ Anyway Adam, if I remain locked here all my life, I will never find someone….”

Adam studied her face for a couple of seconds, and then fixed his eyes on his plate.  “ Don’t say I didn’t warn you.  It’s your life Molly,” he finally said. I don’t want to have this kind of conversation right now.  She is going to the Ball with Hoss, no harm about it.

“ Oh come on Adam, you are my friend. Help me with this.”

“ Help you with what?” he asked without hiding his annoyance.

“ To get a husband of course,” she answered and glanced around.

“ I cannot help you with that,” he said unpleasantly.

Here they go again. Ben took his wineglass and sipped his wine while he analyzed the situation.  Molly and Adam were having their own conversation as if they were alone in the horse and their words were full of hidden messages.  Ben looked at her from the corner of his eyes.  Molly was an open book to him and he could read in each line of her sweet face how deeply in love she was with his eldest son.  It was neither difficult to him to realize that she struggled to stop thinking about Adam.  However she seemed to be confident with what she was doing, Ben was no so sure of it. Poor Molly, why didn’t she fell in love with another man? Adam was far from being in any condition to face any kind of relationship yet. In fact it had been a long time since he could open himself up to his family.
Adam had his attention back to his supper.  He was tired and wanted to share the rest of the evening with his son.  He glanced at Matt and frowned as he noticed that his son was getting upset.  He leaned towards him and tenderly asked him what was happening to him.

“ I wanna go to bed,” he said and Adam noticed that his voice had an edge of anger.

“ Come here,” said Adam gently. He took Matt by his arms and seated him on his lap.  Matt shifted against his father’s body and placed his thumb in his mouth. “ Do you want to stay in my bed till you fall asleep?” Matt’s face lit up with a smile. Then nodded and stared at his father happily. Adam smiled and caressed Matt’s face. 

“ And tomorrow, we may go to have lunch by the lake.  Just you and me. Would you like that?”

“ Yeah” shouted Matt and clung to Adam’s neck. “ I want you to sing me a song.”

Adam rose with Matt in his arms.  He smiled and he felt Matt’s hand caressing his face. Gently he kissed his son’s forehead. “ Say goodnight to everybody.”

Matt turned to address them waving his little hand saying goodnight.  His face showed clearly how happy he was.  Adam walked towards the staircase and was about to climb, when Ben told him that he would wait for him so they could talk about the damages at the north fence.  Adam nodded while Matt abruptly turned angry eyes to his grandpa.

“ No Grandpa,” he shouted full of indignation. “ You said that you had sent daddy away so you can be with me.  Now I want to be with him.” Matt said angry and annoyed.  His little hand caressed Adam’s face.“ That’s not fair.”

Ben stared at him with astonishment. He could not reckon letting his own sons shout at him that way, far less being younger than four years old. What a temper, he thought. Matt was clearly upset. One of his little hands gripped Adam’s shirt tightly and the other was around his father’s neck. He scowled and rolled his eyes around angrily.

“ What did I tell you about that scowl, Matt” said Adam clearly angry. “ I don’t want to hear again that you address neither grandpa, nor your uncles or Molly that way.”

“ Sorry daddy, but I want to be with you. I miss you,” said Matt with a childish, pleading voice and hid his face against Adam’s neck. Adam thought that he would begin to cry, but instead Matt raised his head back and looked at his grandpa, giving him his best smile. “ Sorry Grandpa, I love you.”

“ Matt, you are a blackmailer,” Adam said with disbelief. “ Where do you learn that behavior?” Matt did not answer the question. He leaned Adam’s shoulder and closed his eyes. “ Good night everybody,” he said as they went upstairs. “ Have a nice time at the Ball.”  Adam briefly stopped at the top of the stair and turned to give his father an amused look. “ See you tomorrow Pa.”

Ben shook his head with seriousness and slowly let a smile appeared on his lips as his heart nearly melted by his grandson words.  Joe and Hoss laughed out loud teasing their father.  Little by little the laughter decreased and all of them commented about how jealous Matt was regarding Adam’s attention.  Hoss snorted with amusement.  

“ Definitely his Adam’s boy.  Like his father he knows perfectly well where to touch when he is in trouble,” Ben said and snorted.

“ I love to watch them talking or staring at each other,” commented Molly with tenderness.

“ Yeah, I know what you mean Sis,” said Hoss. “There is so much love in Adam’s eyes when he looks at Matt.”

 “ Adam’s eyes can say a lot if you know how to look” Ben added as he glanced at Hoss with emotion. Joe and Hoss nodded, knowing what their father meant. “He can be so sensitive.” And this time all of them realized that he was thinking out loud, happy to have his real Adam back.

Molly was in her own world.  She was not paying attention on what the Cartwrights were saying. Although she was thinking about Adam, her thoughts were addressing her own feelings regarding Adam.  After the scene she had witnessed, she realized that she would never be able to find a man that inspired her the way he did.   Beyond the loving, tender man she had discovered many months ago, she now saw another Adam.  He could also be a caring devoted father; capable of anything only to see Matt’s face lit up with a smile. I want him. Nobody could replace him. Stop it Molly.  She couldn’t handle her feelings.

“ Let’s go or we’ll be late,” Joe said while he left his napkin next to his plate.

“ I’ll go for my shawl,” she said trying to sound confident. “ I’ll meet you outside.”
 
~~ FOUR ~~

Adam came into his room thankful that the day was finished. Slowly he got undressed until he was completely naked and lay down in his bed. He turned the lamp down, having no interest in reading that night. He shifted his head against the pillow and closed his eyes.  

He fell into a vivid dream.  He saw himself walking through a narrow street in Paris, hand in hand with Molly.  One of the bridges that crossed the Sienna River appeared in front of him.  He ran with her upon the middle of the bridge. Kiss me my love; she said eagerly, it brings luck. He took her in his arms with desperation and kissed her madly, struggling to keep in his soul all the sensation that the contact of their lips produced.  We are alive Adam, remember that my love.  We are free as the wind, only you and me. We don’t need anybody else. Adam felt his body vibrate and his soul delight with the willing kiss.  Slowly he stepped back and delicately moved the hair that hid her face with his fingers.  He gazed into her eyes, her smile.  Molly‘s smiling face was staring at him. “ Sorry friend, I have wasted enough time with you. I need to find a husband now. Bye Adam,” she said and ran away from him. A group of men surrounded her at the end of the bridge.  They grinned at him while they led Molly off of the bridge.

Adam awoke startled and soaked with sweat.  He felt a knot in his throat and a disturbance deep in his soul.  He left the bed and walked around his room, the sensation of the dream remained within him and slowly the knot of his throat spread to his stomach.  He took several deep breaths seeking to calm himself down.  He had crossed those bridges a lot of times with Karen, his wife when they were in Paris. And he could not understand how Molly could so easily alter his own memories. Adam frowned while he rubbed his jaw wondering about her. Molly’s image was fixed in his mind and he didn’t fight against it this time.

 Don’t fool yourself Adam, you know perfectly well that you are jealous.  Molly didn’t choose you this time. In fact she told you that she was tired of waiting. Adam shook his head and went back to bed. But couldn’t sleep. He stared at the window as he wondered how strong her determination to find a husband was.  I’m not ready for that yet.  Adam frowned. He was confused as a revolution took place inside.  He shook his head with exasperation. He closed his eyes and tried to go back to sleep.

Adam awoke a couple of minutes after dawn.  He was feeling better after sleeping in his warm comfortable bed. He had the feeling that he had dreamed about Molly, but he could not remember the dream. He shifted against his pillow and closed his eyes trying to go back to sleep but couldn’t. Adam sat up and after moving his neck on both sides, he left the bed. He stretched his arms and yawned.  Nothing compared to my own bed, he thought, hope Pa does not send me to camp for a while He moved to his dresser and looked at his image in the mirror. What do we have here, he wondered and grimaced. You look awful Adam.  He took the trousers that were over the chair next to the window and pulled them on. Afterwards he moved to his cupboard and looked for clean clothes.  With the boots still in his hands he left the room eagerly anticipating a bath and shave.

After the long night’s rest, the hot bath and the shave, Adam was feeling like a new man.   He went back to his room grateful for not meeting a member of the family yet. He had always enjoyed this time of the morning as the house was in complete silence allowing him to enjoy the paper, drinking a cup of coffee in peace.  He watched his image in the mirror and smiled pleased with what he saw.  In a certain way, Adam felt that he was beginning a new stage in his life, as he remembered the whole dream and how real it had seemed. He sighed. ‘ You are getting old and sentimental, Adam’ he spoke to the image in front of him. He left the room thinking about the cup of coffee that he wanted to have.

The main room was deserted, but Hop Sing had the table ready for breakfast. Adam smelled the fresh coffee and walked towards the kitchen. He came back to the dining room a couple of minutes later, carrying the coffeepot and filled his cup, whistling.  Then he picked up the paper that Hop Sing had already placed beside Ben’s cup and buried himself in the news.

Adam had most of the paper read when he heard footsteps coming from the upper floor. He turned and saw his Pa coming downstairs followed closely by Hoss.

“ Good morning son,” said Ben and slapped Adam’s shoulder as he passed next to him. “ Did you sleep well?”

“ Yes, Pa thanks.”

“ You looked like hell yesterday, brother” commented Hoss with a kind smile.

“ That’s exactly how I was feeling as well as exhausted,” Adam said. He snorted while he passed the coffeepot to his father. “ Don’t mention it to Joe, but I barely slept in that bedroll,” he said with a grin. “ Man, I haven’t slept on the ground for years, I forgot how uncomfortable it could be.”

“ I heard you big brother,” said Joe with amusement. He strode across the main room and slapped Adam’s back while he giggled. “ Hoss, I told you big brother here is getting old.” Adam shook his head but let a smile appeared in his face. “Don’t forget about our bet, Adam,” said Joe with mischievousness as he struggled to contain the laughers.

“ Oh, you are right Joe. I forget about that myself. Adam was the last one,” Hoss said joining his brother against Adam. “ You’ll have extra work this week big brother.”

Joe and Hoss laughed out loud.  Adam twisted his mouth and arrogantly raise done eyebrow while he filled his plate with eggs and bacon. He glanced at Hoss and Joe and grinned. “ You are having a good time, aren’t you?” Both of them nodded and their laughter became noisier than before.

Ben stared at them happily as he tried to remember the last time that the three of them shared a moment of laughter. Adam’s bright eyes met Ben’s gaze and he winked to his father showing him that he was fine.  Ben smiled back letting him know that he knew.

“ Good morning family,” said Molly from the bottom of the staircase.  She yawned while she crossed the main room towards them.  After greeting all she sat in her place next to Ben.  He looked at Molly with a smile and poured a cup of coffee for her.  She nodded gratefully while she placed the napkin over her lap.

“ How was that Ball?” Ben asked anxiously.  Molly shook her head and leaning an elbow upon the table she dropped her face in the palm of her hand. “ What is that supposed to mean?”

“ It happened that Tom Sander wanted to monopolize Molly,” Joe began saying dedicating a grimace to Molly. “ But as soon as we entered into the main room, she was surrounded by men and Tom tried to defend her.”

“ I didn’t need Tom to defend me,” protested Molly while she straightened and looked at Joe. “ Nobody was bothering me. They were being very kind.”

“ But what happened?” Ben wanted to know not understanding what Molly and Joe were saying.

“ I’m going to explain it to you Pa, “ Hoss replied with smiling face. “ Tom ruined the Ball. As soon as Molly came into the room, Tom approached her as well as Marc Wells followed by John Carson and many others surrounded Molly.  Marc asked Molly the first dance but before she could answer, Tom threw a right cross to Marc’s jaw and he landed against a group of ladies that were talking in one corner.  Their escorts got mad and they jumped on Tom. That was the beginning and the place became a true mess in a matter of minutes. “

Molly shook her head while she told Ben how ashamed she felt.

“ Of course, most of them ended up in jail,” added Joe with amusement and turned his eyes to Molly. “ You also gave a lot of work to poor Roy Coffee, my dear Molly.”

Molly shook her head full of shame as she felt her cheeks turned pink.  It was so embarrassing to watch them punch each other because of her. But it was far worse to realize that everybody there knew that she was the reason of the fight.

“ It seems that we cannot let you go out,” commented Adam with irony. She raised her eyes and looked at him with disgust.

 “Mind your own business, will you” Molly replied sharply, while she noticed that his lips formed a teasing smile. “ You ought to have come to the Ball and faced your matters there, my dear.”

“ Excuse me,” said Adam arching one eyebrow with surprised. “ I didn’t have any business at that Ball.”

“ Indeed you have,” was Molly’s quick replied. “ Let me tell you that one of these days you’ll have to appear yourself in Virginia City and face all your women,”
Molly finally said as she grinned at him. Adam’s face became dark and he looked at her with disgust. “ Don’t look at me that way. I’m fed up of those snakes, because if I did not have enough with Marc and Tom, I also have to put up with Mary Ann Wilson, Peggy Steward and I think that the other was called Sarah something.” Molly paused irked. “ All of them asking about you, my dear Adam.”

Adam did not reply. He simply fixed his eyes on Molly’s.  Joe stared at them amused, knowing that his brother and Molly were about to start one of their usual battles. All they needed was a soft push, so he winked to Hoss.

“ What did they want?” Joe asked with naive expression and glanced at Adam.

Adam straightened in his chair and was on guard as soon as he heard his brother’s question.

“ They want your brother of course Joe. All of them wanted to be Mrs. Adam Cartwright,” commented Molly with annoyance. She sipped her coffee and looked at
Adam over her cup.  He had his dark distrustful gaze on her.  Easy Adam, she is having a good time with you.  “ Well, maybe you’d like to know that I told those ladies that they could come and have dinner with us one of these days,” she said and raised the corner of her lips. “ One at a time, of course.”  Molly paused and calmly turned her attention to Ben, who was having a good time with the conversation. Molly winked at him  “Is there any problem Ben. “

“ No darling. It’s a wonderful idea,” said Ben and laughed out loud.

Adam shook his head without being able to believe it. He glanced around the table only to notice that all of them were having a good time teasing him.  Here turned his look to Molly.

“ Done. I’ll make all the arrangements for next Friday” she commented and rose. “ Will that work for you, dear?” she asked addressing Adam.

 “ You know Molly, I was in my best mood this morning,” Adam said dryly. “ But you have the art to change it.” He paused while he cleaned his mouth with his napkin.  “ And please stop calling me dear, will you” said Adam with exasperation.

“ Yes, I guess you are right. I don’t think those snakes like to hear me refer to you that way,” she said from the middle of the hallway. “They are not very friendly with me.”

“ Stop you two,” Ben said laughing. “ Molly, give him a break.”  Ben turned to Adam and noticed that his son was uncomfortable. “ By the way, Adam there was a package with books for you. They arrived a week ago, but you didn’t pick them up.”

“ How could I forget about it” Adam said shaking his head.

“ You have a lot on your mind,” commented Molly sarcastically coming back from the kitchen. “ May Ann, Peggy, Sarah and who knows how many others.”

Hoss and Joe broke out laughing.  What the hell? Don’t let her win Adam. Adam raised his eyes as his annoyance turned into anger. “ You know, I think that you are jealous,” said Adam tired of her comments.

“ Moi? No way” she replied with challenge. “ I’m far better than those snakes. A pity you did not notice that.”

Adam was about to rise and reply, but Ben stopped him raising his hand. “It’s enough, “ Ben said seriously, as the conversation became a bit harsh. He turned to Molly first. “ Molly leave Adam in peace for a while.” She raised both hands in surrender and nodded. Ben turned to Adam. “ Why don’ you go and wake Matt up,” he suggested to his son. Adam took a deep breath and rose without saying another word. Ben shook his head and glanced at Joe and Hoss who were laughing loudly. “ Stop laughing and go to do your chores.”

~~ FIVE~~

After two weeks of uninterrupted work repairing the damages caused by the hard winter, Ben Cartwright gave his hands the weekend off.  Ben was aware that they deserved it, but he also wanted them fresh as well as rested to face the lumber contract Joe had signed in Sacramento.

Unlike the other hands of the Ponderosa, Jeremy Wheeler did not want to remain in town. He had other plans. He had seen the three Cartwrights brother sharing a couple of beers in the Silver Dollar and he also knew that their father was attempting a meeting with his lawyer. That left Molly alone in the house and taking advantage of that Jeremy decided to go back to the ranch.

He was a tall slender man, with crystalline gray eyes and blond hair.  A childish smile seemed to play in his lips most of the time, which made him look even younger than his age. Only a year ago, Jeremy was on his way to Los Angeles, when his horse tumbled and lost one shoe. Therefore he had no alternative but to stop in Virginia City.  He was dismounting his horse beside the Livery Stable when something grasped his attention. He narrowed his eyes to watch a lady who was talking with a young man. He fixed his eyes on her beautiful face as he had the feeling that he had seen her before, but he could not reckon where. He shrugged thinking that he might be confused. He had been traveling around the territory for years and met lot of beautiful ladies he could barely remember. Perhaps, she reminded me one of them, the thought.

After leaving his horse at the Livery Stable, Jeremy headed towards the canteen seeking a cold beer to refresh himself. As he entered the canteen, he saw the same young man he had seen with the lady talking to the bartender. Jeremy could not resist the intrigue and he managed to start a conversation with the young fellow.  He easily learned that his name was Joseph Cartwright, the youngest son of the famous rancher, Ben Cartwright. Jeremy had heard a lot about the powerful Cartwrights and their huge Ponderosa. At that moment, Jeremy had a hunch and decided that his trip to Los Angeles could wait. Among beers, Jeremy mentioned that he was looking for a job and asked Joe Cartwright if there was something he could do at his ranch. It was his lucky day. The Cartwrights were hiring hands.

Jeremy was very comfortable working at the Ponderosa. The pay was excellent and their boss a good man, but he did not want to stay because of that. He was there because of Molly.  The longer he watched her, the more he thought he knew her from before. But, from where was the question that was eating him. Memories came back to him one morning and the realization shook him strongly.  The first thing that crossed his mind was to pack his things and rush out of the Ponderosa as fast as he could. But after a second thought, he decided that there was something else that he could do.  After months working under Ben Cartwright’s orders, Jeremy was aware that his boss loved Molly as his own daughter, so if he conquered her and made her his wife, one-day part of the wealthy Ponderosa would be his. He would never allow her to remember, at least not before their wedding, because if she did, everything would be lost.

During the following months, Jeremy developed the art to pass unnoticed and moved around the house as a shadow. He followed her without being seen, studying each movement of her face and body, and learning each step of her unchanged routine. He was proud to know that nobody knew her better than him. Before his eyes she was vulnerable as he could destroy the harmony of her world whenever he wanted to do it. As Molly would be the key to a wealthy future, he played the gentle good man role to her and she bought it. Each time he could, Jeremy showed her how caring and attentive he was and Molly seemed to like him.

His determination to marry her became an obsession and Jeremy found himself thinking about his plan night and day. Jeremy was ready to step into the second stage of his plan when the prodigal son came back home. Molly changed the moment Adam Cartwright walked into the big house. He watched her that afternoon, as he always did, and noticed the minimal change in her eyes. From that day onwards she never had time to talk to him as she had in the past.  She was always too busy taking care of Adam Cartwright’s son.  

As months passed he heard a lot of rumors about Molly and the older Cartwright brother, but Jeremy did not believe them. A wonderful lady like she was could never be in love with such an arrogant man, he thought and hated Adam Cartwright for altering his plan.
Jeremy entered the yard and grinned when he saw her playing with Matthew Cartwright. He moved his horse near the stable where he dismounted. With the reins still in his hands, Jeremy moved closer to her and tied the horse to the corral. He turned at her while he took from his saddlebags a bouquet of flowers.

“ I thought that all of you were staying in Virginia City till tomorrow evening,” she said with kind soft voice.

“ I was tired of that noisy city. I decided to come back here,” Jeremy answered gently while he gave her the bouquet of flowers. “ This is for you Miss Molly. A little present for the unpleasant moment you had yesterday at the party,” he said and the smile did not leave his face. Molly nodded as she took the flowers and stared at them delighted. “ It seemed that neither Tom nor Marc know how to treat a beautiful woman like you.”

“ You are very kind, Jeremy. Thanks for the flowers and the compliment,” she replied with a huge smile while she took Matt by his hand. “ Do you want to have a cup of coffee with me?” Jeremy nodded struggling to control his excitement. “ Let’s go inside.”

Meanwhile Molly went to the kitchen for the coffee and a vase for the flowers, Jeremy sat on the settee. He grinned as the realized that it had been easier than he had expected. He had waited for this moment for so long that he barely believed that he was inside the big house waiting for her. Jeremy nodded and glanced around the room wondering how it would be to be the owner of such a wonderful house. He never had a house of his own in his whole life. Soon, it will be soon, he thought and grinned.  His look met Matt’s suspicious eyes. Jeremy hated the boy as much as he hated his father.

Matt was seated on the blue chair studying the man.  He did not like that other men came into the house to visit Molly.  The boy was afraid that one of those men that showed so much interest in her would take Molly away from him.  He decided that he would talk about it with his father as he always did when he needed to fix up something.

Molly came from the kitchen carrying a tray with two cups, the coffeepot and a glass of milk for Matt.  She looked at Matt puzzled as she noticed a distrustful look on his little face.

“ What’s up Matt?” she asked softly. Matt shook his head while he rose from the chair. He walked silently towards the staircase. “ Honey, don’t you want your glass of milk?”

“ No thanks, I’ll go to play with my soldiers,” he mumbled.

“ OK,” she replied while she watched Matt climb the stairs.

Molly placed the tray on the table and quickly filled two cups with coffee, while she asked Jeremy about his past life. So she is interested after all, Jeremy observed and the thought brought a smile to his lips. He took the cup she was offering and sipped the coffee. He glanced around with thoughtful expression making up his mind about his next words. He had to build up a good tale, but he was not nervous about it, he was real good on that. Jeremy leaned back feeling important, and crossed his legs. He told Molly about his early days in Denver as the little brother of five sons. He kept on talking for more than half an hour about his childhood, the ranch he had worked with his wife and how terrible it had been to lose her. Molly followed the story in silence, touched by the sad tone of his voice. She had never listened to him this way. And she was discovering a sensitive, attentive man, hardly beaten by a tough life.

Adam came into the house and was surprised to find one of the hands having coffee with her. He did not like it and did not try to hide his annoyance. He left his hat in the hook and placed his gunbelt over the sideboard.

“ Mr. Cartwright,” Jeremy said rising abruptly. They shook hands firmly. “ I came to visit Molly. I want to show her that not all men are like Tom Sander and Marc Wells,” he explained with a smile.

“ You don’t have to explain anything to me,” Adam commented dryly and gave a glance to Molly. “ Is there some coffee for me?”
 “ Miss Molly, I’ll be on my way,” he said gently. He was feeling angry as Adam interrupted the wonderful moment he was having with Molly. “ It’s late and I don’t want to bother you anymore.”

Molly followed him to the main entrance. She opened the door and he started out the door but he stopped in the middle of the threshold and turned to her.

“ Miss Molly, I was wondering if you’ll accept a ride with me one of this days,” he asked shyly.

“ Well, I’m actually very busy this days,” she replied without knowing how to deny the invitation without being rude. “ But, as soon as I have a spare moment, I’ll let you know, Jeremy. Thanks for the invitation.”

Jeremy nodded and glanced at Adam over his shoulder. “ Good evening, Mr. Cartwright,” he said and walked out of the house without waiting for Adam’s reply.

Molly closed the door as soon as Jeremy left the house. She let herself fall back upon the door with relief. Although she had enjoyed his company, Molly did not want to have any kind of relationship with Jeremy. She straightened up and raised her eyes. Adam was staring at her with amusement.

“ If you have something to say, then say it,” she said sharply.

“ I was wondering, why never crossed my mind to take you to a ride, not to mention bring you flowers,” Adam commented with suggestive tone. “ Will you let me know when you are free for a ride?”

“ Oh, so you are in your best mood this evening,” she teased him while she walked back to the settee. He arched one eyebrow showing her that he was expecting an answer. “ Ok. I think I have sometime for you tomorrow,” she answered as she sat on the settee facing him. Adam raised one corner of his lips while he nodded. “ Done. Here is your coffee?”  she said delivering the cup to him. “ Matt is upstairs. I’m sure he is sleeping.”

Adam nodded and sipped his coffee. Molly placed the cups she and Jeremy had used over the tray and carried everything back to the kitchen. Adam could not take his eyes off her. He was tired and troubled. That afternoon when he was having some beers with his brothers at Silver Dollar, he had heard lots of men talking about her. He did not like it, nor did he like finding Jeremy Wheeler alone with her. He was beginning to realize how important she was for him and how jealous he was.

Jeremy entered the bunkhouse feeling the anger growing inside. He slammed a chair over and threw his hat against the wall. He was sure that Adam Cartwright had come back home knowing that she was alone in the house. Jeremy lay down in his cot and folded his arms behind his head. I have to think about something to stop that Cartwright, he thought. He was getting very angry. He could fell the rage surging as he imagined the different ways to stop that Cartwright.  He grinned. He decided to wait, just a bit, he had always been a patient man.

~~SIX~~

After dinner the family gathered around the fireplace. Although they were almost in spring, the temperature was still low. Ben and Molly were talking about the supplies she had to purchase the following day. Hoss and Joe were ready to start one of their usual checkers matches, while Adam was trying to read over his son’s head, as the boy denied leaving his lap.

“Molly, who was that man?” Matt’s voice grasped the attention of everyone, as he had been oddly silent most of the evening.

“ He is Jeremy Wheeler,” she answered looking at him. “ He’s one of the hands.”

“ But, is he your friend?” Matt followed asking not satisfied yet.

“ I don’t think I can call him that,” Molly commented with a thoughtful expression. She frowned puzzled. “ Why are you asking?”

“ I don’t like him,” he simply said struggling his small shoulders.

“ Why’s that?” asked Adam with surprise as he closed the book.
“ Because he looks at Molly as if he wanted to eat her,” Matt replied quickly. Five pair of eyes were fixed on his little face.“ Yeah, he looks at Molly the same way
Uncle Hoss looks his food,” he added with smart tone.  

Although it was a funny comment only Matt smiled. Hoss twisted his mouth as he frowned. Molly felt her cheeks turn to pink and lowered her eyes not able to look at them. She could fell Adam’s gaze fixed on her face. Ben and Joe hid their amusement behind their cups of coffee.

“ Will you please excuse me,” Molly said abruptly and strode into the kitchen.

Joe winked to Hoss and they returned to their game, while Adam reopened his book. Matt followed Molly with confusion in his eyes. He looked up at his father and asked him what was happening to her. Adam shrugged but did not raise his eyes from the book. Ben twisted his mouth while he rubbed his jaw, knowing that Matt would address him. And he did.

“Grandpa, is Molly going away with one of those men,” he asked with concerned. Ben frowned and folded his arms against his chest, while Joe and Hoss looked at their nephew with intrigue. Matt glanced around. “ I do not want her to go away.”

“ Why are you saying that baby?” Joe asked puzzled.

“ I don’t know,” he said with smart tone as he hugged himself with thoughtfully expression. “ I don’t like the way those men greeted her in Virginia City.” He paused and glanced at his father. “ Daddy, you have to talk to her,” he said with pleading voice. “ You cannot let her leave us.”

Adam became alert. The message was clear and Adam twisted his mouth knowing what his son meant; ´ you cannot let her leave you and me. ´ He arched one eyebrow suddenly uncomfortable. He did not need to move his eyes from Matt to know that his father and brother’s inquiring eyes were on him. This whole situation was exactly what he did not want to happen, until he made up his mind about it.

“ Baby, Molly is not going anywhere,” Adam finally said with soft but strained voice, knowing that these words were also for him.

Matt leaned back against his father’s body. He bit his upper lip with concentration. Adam knew that the conversation was not finished yet. Ben leaned his elbow over the armrest resting his chin on his fist and exchanged amused glances with Joe and Hoss. The three of them realized that Adam was in trouble and they were waiting to see how he would manage to get rid of his son. Suddenly Matt’s face lit up as a smile broke into his lips.

“ Daddy, I got an idea,” Matt said eagerly.

“ I’m not sure that I want to hear it,” Adam mumbled while he sipped his coffee.

“ Look, if you marry her, she will never leave us. She will be with me forever.” Matt’s voice was so excited that his words filled the main room. Adam choked with his coffee as soon as he heard Matt’s suggestion. He began to cough and for a few seconds he could not speak.

“ Are you all right big brother?” asked Joe with teasing tone, while Hoss snorted laughter. “ That was a great idea, Matt,” said Joe mischievously.
Adam scowled and glanced around with disbelief, but his eyes turned back to Matt as soon as he saw their faces full of amusement. He pressed the bridge of his nose with two fingers thinking what he could say. He chose the truth, at least part of it.

“ Look Matt, I cannot marry Molly because you want to keep her by your side,” Adam said firmly.

“ But, daddy don’t you love her,” the boy asked puzzled. “ I do.”

Bad answer Adam, pay attention, he shouted to himself. He looked at Matt and managed to smile. “ Let’s talk about it tomorrow,” he suggested softly while he caressed Matt’s face, begging that Matt did not notice that he was avoiding the question.

“ But promise me that you’ll think about it,” Matt insisted with pleading voice. “Please, daddy, please.”

“ End of the conversation, Matthew, I said tomorrow. ” Adam’s voice was full of exasperation. Matt twisted his mouth and rolled his eyes around.  He had learned that when his father got like this it was useless to insist. “ It’s your bedtime.”

“ It’s always bedtime when we are at the best part of a conversation,” Matt complained smartly as he left his father’s legs. Adam’s scowl face told him that his father was getting sulky. Suddenly upset Matt ran towards the kitchen. “ Matthew, come here.”
Matt came back a couple of minutes later hand in hand with Molly. When they reached the staircase, Molly knelt facing Matt and took his face in her hands.

“ Don’t worry baby, I’m not going anywhere, all right?” Matt nodded and hugged her saying good night to Molly. “ That was a wonderful hug.”

“ Do you want another one?” Matt asked proudly and gave her a nice smile. Molly nodded and Matt hugged her while Molly lifted him.

The whole family stared at them with tenderness. Adam could feel a smile spreading, coming all the way from the bottom of his heart. He did not want to show it, but it finally broke across his lips. His heart was beating fast as his resistance lessened before the lovely and touching scene. It was an overwhelming sensation and he wanted to embrace them, but he didn’t do it. Instead he took a deep breath and pushed away his emotions. Adam wanted to disappear the upper floor. He needed to organize his feelings as all of a sudden he felt that he was losing control. He needed to find a way to stop his heart from beating so fast, stop the inside trembling that seized him. But above all, stop thinking about all those men that wanted to marry her. Adam moved closer to Molly and took Matt from her arms. They exchanged glances briefly but Molly turned away quickly and walked towards the settee where she sat. Matt waved his little hand to his family while Adam began to climb the staircase.

Ben sipped his coffee while he studied her face over his cup. Her eyes were fixed on Adam’s back. It was evident to him that Molly had heard Matt’s suggestion as well as Adam’s reply.  Hoss sat next to her once he finished the checker match with his brother. Joe had won once more and rubbing his hands together, asked Hoss to play another match. Hoss shook his head and addressed Molly.

“ Sis, why do you think that Matt said that you are leaving us,” Hoss wanted to know. “ Is there something you are not telling us?”

“ No, Hoss” she replied weakly while she glanced at the three of them. Her face was covered by a shadow. “ If such a thing ever happens, you three will be the first to know.”

“ What is it Molly?” Joe asked as he sat on the table facing her. “ You look sad.”

“ I’m not sad. I mean, sad is not the word Joe,” she replied. Her voice was full of annoyance and embarrassment. She raised her eyes and glanced at the top of the stairs reassuring herself that Adam was not yet there. “I love Matt so much, I love to be with him all the time, and I’m sure that his comment made Adam feel uncomfortable.” Molly paused while she shook her head. “ I don’t want him to be uncomfortable because of me.”
 
“ He is not uncomfortable because of you,” Hoss said with his typical sweet tender voice. “Adam is uncomfortable because of Matt’s words.”  

“ Maybe but, do you think that he would try to take Matt away from me in order to avoid… you know… what Matt said,” she finally said full of embarrassment.

“ Come on Sis,” Hoss said while he moved closer to her and he passed one of his huge arms across her slim shoulders. “ Adam loves to have you here.”
Molly raised her eyes and glanced from Hoss to Ben and then to Joe. The three of them were smiling at her, showing her that what Hoss had said was true. Slowly, Molly let a shy smile appear in her lips.

“ I love you three,” she said with emotion placing one hand on Ben’s arms, the other one on Joe’s leg and leaned against Hoss. She took a deep breath and rose while she told them that she was going to bed. “ Good night. See you tomorrow.”

Adam came into his room still thinking about Matt’s suggestion. Slowly he got undressed until he was completely naked. He turned down the lamp and lay down in his bed wondering if Molly had heard them. Adam was confused. At first he denied his feelings pretending that what his son said was the stupidest thing in the word and after a couple of minutes, he wanted to hold Molly in his arms and not let her go. Adam shook his head with exasperation. He hated being like this. He folded his arms behind his head without any desire of sleep. He was restless and unless he got in good terms with his feelings he would have to face a sleepless night. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes trying to relax himself.

Ok Adam, this is the situation, his inner voice started saying as soon as he closed his eyes. You’ve been under strict control for so long that you don’t even recognize your own feelings. For years you’ve lied to yourself pretending that everything would be just fine if you shut your heart, not letting love hurt you again. Well man you were dead wrong and with you hermetism you are increasing the pain. As a matter of fact, what you are feeling is love; and you know it. As well as you know that what Matt said it’s exactly what you had been thinking the whole afternoon. Adam shifted and twisted his mouth as his inner voice faced him with his feelings. Yes Cartwright, you love her as much as you are able to love. Don’t you realize that she blew your smart brains out of your head; don’t you feel that she’s under your skin and there is no way to take her out of there. Since the moment you kissed her you’ve been wondering when you’ll be able to do it again. Adam grinned and bit his lower lip just wondering what else he could do.  Face it man, you want to have her in your arms and kiss her until you cannot breathe.

“ And much more too,” he said out loud and a smile broke into his lips.

It was not painful to face himself, but it was odd to realize suddenly that he could feel so much love. Come on man, the inner voice shouted angrily. Accept it as it is. You want her by your side, day after day, for your whole lifetime. You love her with capital letters. What Matt said is true. You cannot let her leave us. Matt loves her as much as if she was his real mother. He opened his eyes. In the dark of his room all he could see was her face and his ears were full of her gently sweet voice and her infected laughers. And you are spoiling it off with your too much thinking. What are you waiting for or is that you are too comfortable behind that cold curtain of loneliness and sorrow. Whatever the answer is, unless you do something you are going to lose her. She will marry another one. Today you heard how most men in Virginia City talked about her. Adam frowned and instantly sat up suddenly alert. Oh you get the picture, don’t you? the inner voice said ironically and Adam snorted with exasperation, not feeling easy anymore. You are hurting her with your never-ending doubts and uncertainty. And she will get tired of it. Are you going to let her go because you are too scared to face happiness once again? Are you getting that low? Adam was burning inside as a mix of anger and jealousy seized him. If you love her you’ll have to risk. For God’s sake cross the line. It’s going to be very painful to watch her marry another man.

“ No way, she will marry no man but me,” he said angrily. Suddenly he smiled feeling better. “ It sounds good. I hope it’s not too late.”

Adam closed his eyes, the smile still in his lips. He slept the rest of the night in peace.

~~ SEVEN~~

When Adam came down to breakfast he found his father at the table with Hoss, Joe and Molly. He strode across the main room eagerly to start a new day.

“ Good morning, everybody,” he greeted them smilingly, full of enthusiasm gathering the attention of all.

Joe and Hoss exchanged glances wondering what was in his mind that he seemed to be in his best mood. Ben scanned Adam’s face and noticed that his son’s eyes wandered around the table and briefly stopped in Molly’s face, turning them away quickly. Well, well, well, he thought while he sipped his coffee, what do we have here.  Ben guessed what could be making Adam feel so good that morning and decided to give him a little push.

“ Adam, I’m sending your brothers to check the cattle that is grassing near the north fence,” Ben said firmly and watched Adam nodding while he sipped his coffee. “ I’m planning to go myself to the south part of the ranch and see if there are enough trees there to meet the lumber contract.” Ben paused and took a bite of his toast. “ Do you mind if I take Matt with me?”

“ No,” answered Adam with a smile, wondering what all this talk was leading up to. He looked at his father with amusement. “ Why don’t you just tell me what you have in mind for me?”

“ Well son, I was about to ask you to stay here and find the best way to deliver those trees,” Ben said with determination. Adam raised one corner of his lips as he analyzed his father’s words. Then nodded. Ben noticed at once that Adam’s face suddenly brightened.  So I guessed right, he thought with emotion. His eyes met with Adam’s gaze, who was looking at him with complicity as a mischievous smile dance in his lips. Well, he knows me too, Ben thought with amusement. He glanced around the table and stopped as his eyes caught the frown on Joe’s face, obviously not pleased with the distribution of chores. I will explain it to him later, Ben told himself. Before his temperamental son said something, Ben addressed Molly. “ Molly, I added these things that I need you to buy.”

Molly nodded and silently took the piece of paper that Ben was giving her and placed it next to her cup. She had the same countenance as the night before, and Ben wondered if Adam knew how she was feelings.

“ Are you all right Molly?” Adam asked a couple of minutes later. He needed to start a conversation with her, whatever the subject was. “ You haven’t said a word since I sat at the table.”

Molly did not raise her eyes from her breakfast. She cleaned her mouth with her napkin and left it next to her cup of coffee. “ I didn’t sleep well, that’s all,” she said and rose before he asked further questions. “ I want an early start, so please excuse me.”
Adam watched her as she walked into the kitchen and bit his lower lip buried in his thoughts. His mind was made up. He would wait for Molly to come back from Virginia City. He would have lunch alone with her, where he would have plenty of time to talk to her about his feelings. Adam let his gaze wander around the table and noticed that his father and brothers were staring at him. He cleaned his throat and rose telling his father that he would waken Matt.

“ I guess all of us want an early start,” he let the comment drop as if he was suggesting something.

Ben snorted and shook his head, glad to see that Adam finally decided to show his feelings.

Molly rode into the dusty streets of Virginia City and stopped the wagon in front of Mr. Samuel’s General Store. After greeting many acquaintances she walked in. She found Mr. Samuel behind the counter working on some papers. Molly greeted him and gave him the list of supplies she would purchase that morning. As he gathered all the goods, Molly moved around the store not paying attention on what she was seeing. Her thoughts were full of Adam. She was seized by bewilderment. She could not understand him. Just the previous evening he had flirted with her and Molly sensed a bond between them. But after that he did not address her once. That made her realize once more that she had misunderstood him. The confirmation came when she heard his reaction at Matt’s suggestion. And then this same morning he was addressing her with intensity and she felt that bond again.  Is he playing with me, she wondered as the bewilderment turned into distress.
Her thoughts were broken by a conversation that two ladies were having.

“ He is so handsome and gorgeous,” one of the ladies was saying. “ You know Peggy, I’m sure that he will come to visit me one of this days.”

“ Why are you so sure, Mary Ann, “ Peggy said. “ I heard lots of rumors about him and Molly. One of the hands of the Ponderosa told my brother that there’s something between them.”

“ Oh, come on Peggy, she is the housekeeper of the ranch,” she said arrogantly and snorted. “ You certainly do not think that Adam is taking her seriously, do you? Let me explain you something. Adam Cartwright is a handsome man, he cannot be alone. I think that he is having some fun with her and that’s all.” She paused as she saw Mrs. Samuel approaching them. Mary Ann addressed her and quickly asked the lady for the cloth she had ordered. When Mrs. Samuel moved away from them, Mary Ann addressed Peggy again. “ Look Peggy, she is not a lady like us. None of us would be willing to drive a wagon, much less be in charge of buying the supplies for the ranch.” Mary Ann’s voice was full of haughtiness. She snorted sarcastically. “ She is like another Hop Sing for the Cartwrights. And she certainly is not the wife for Adam. ”

“ You know this morning I heard that many of the Ponderosa hands have their eyes on her,” Peggy mentioned with amusement. Mary Ann nodded and laughed out loud.

“ Better for me,” Mary Ann commented. “ She matches with them.”

Mrs. Samuel gave Mary Ann her order. “ Thank you very much, Mrs. Samuel,” Mary Ann said. “ My father is coming to pay this later.”

“ All right Mary Ann,” Mrs. Samuel replied. “ Have a nice day, ladies.”

They left the store laughing loudly as if one of them had made a funny comment. Molly reminded hidden behind some dresses that were hanging on the back corner of the store, wondering if they had seen her. She wanted to vanish in the air as a midst of emotions seized her. She could not move and her stomach had turned up side down many times. Mary Ann’s sharp arrogant words were like knives against her soul. She was reluctant to admit that Mary Ann hit the target this time. Her words made her realize why Adam reacted the way he did the evening before and why he was so charming that morning. He is playing with me, she thought sadly. Tears began to roll across her cheek as she felt how much she loved him and how painful that love was. Suddenly she was feeling small, lesser and unimportant. Molly wiped the tears from her face and swallowed struggling to contain the tears as well as the pressure that pressed her chest and did not let her breathe.

Half an hour later, Molly came out of the store in order to check that Johnny, Mr. Samuel’s assistant, placed everything she had bought on the wagon. But Molly was not paying attention on what the boy was doing. She wanted to ride back to the ranch.  Her heart was bleeding and she needed to be alone and cry.

“ Thank you Johnny,” she said when the boy finished his chore and she gave him a tip.

“ You’re welcome Miss Molly,” he replied with a huge smile.  

Molly cried all the way to the Ponderosa, but her distress brought another thing to think about and Molly found herself wondering what would happen if Adam married someone else. Would he take Matt away from her? She could stand his distance and his playing games, but she could never stand to lose Matt.
Molly rode into the yard and was not surprise to see Jeremy saddling his horse. She stopped the wagon next to the entrance of the porch where Jeremy was standing.
“ Hi, Miss Molly,” he greeted her with huge smile. “ You bought a lot today.”

“ How are you Jeremy,” she greeted him trying to sound nice over her distress. Molly knew that he would try to start a conversation as he always did when he met her. “ Sorry Jeremy, but I’m not good company today,” she said softly as she could barely speak because of the anguish. “ I’m not feeling well at all.”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me, Miss Molly,” Jeremy said with tender voice. “ Don’t worry I’ll take care of this for you.”

 “ Thanks Jeremy, you are always so kind,” she said.

Jeremy watched her walked towards the big house. He was sure that she was sad, but she had been kind and sweet with him and that’s enough to make him realize that she still liked him.

Molly came into the house struggling to control the tears.  She found Adam standing next to his father’s desk. A cup of coffee in his right hand and his eyes fixed on the papers he was studying. She fixed her eyes on him and the tears rolled down without control. Adam leaned back and frowned when he saw Molly looking at him angrily. Her face was covered with tears. He left the cup on the desk and walked to her worried.

“ What happened?” he asked taking Molly by her shoulders. Molly traced his face before she answered. There was a strange look in Adam’s eyes but she could not understand what it was. She shook her head struggling to contain the tears, but it was too late for that. Although Molly did not want him to be there comforting her, she let Adam surrounded her with his strong arms, knowing that she desperately needed him and nobody but him. “ Tell me what is it, Molly,” Adam insisted while he led her to the settee.

“ I don’t want to talk to you,” she said shaking her head. Adam made her sit without taking her arm from her shoulder.

“ You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to do it,” Adam said in a low soft voice.“ But I’m staying here with you.”
Adam pressed her tightly against his body, while he rubbed her arm with his hand. At first her body was tense, rigid, but little by little she began to relax. He felt her head leaned against his chest. With slow movements Adam surrounded her with both arms, while he gently kissed the top of her forehead.

“ Why don’t you tell me,” he whispered. Molly hid her face against his chest and began to cry. “ Why are you crying, Molly? You are scaring me.”

“ What do you think about me, Adam?” Her voice came as a whispered muffled against his body. She sounded both weak and confused to Adam.

“What is my place in this house?”

Adam frowned as he tried to understand the questions. He took a few seconds to wonder what or why she was asking such a thing.  Abruptly she moved away from him. The tears were still rolling across her face. Adam was puzzled and traced her face looking for something that helped him guess what was happening to her.

“ Why are you asking those kind of questions,” he asked again with concerned, while he wiped gently the tears from her face. He took her by her arms again. “Look at me Molly,” he asked softly, but she did not raise her eyes. He pulled her against him. “ Molly you are family, you know that you are one of us,” he whispered right into her ear while he caressed her back, felling her body tense again among his arms.

“ Are you pleased by the way I take care of Matt,” her voice was weak and full of anguish, and Adam felt her tears wetting his neck. “ You told me once that you let me take care of Matt because you did not have another choice. But, if you marry again, you will take him away from me, won’t you?”

“ What?” shouted Adam and slowly moved her apart from him in order to see her face. Adam was surprised, confused, and completely lost in what she was saying. “ What are you talking about?”

Molly lowered her eyes and nervously her fingers began to play with her skirt. Adam gently took her chin and raised her face till his eyes met hers.  

“ Molly, you know that I didn’t mean to say that,” he said ashamed of his own words. “ You also know that I love to see you with Matt.”

Molly got lost in his intense deep hazel eyes, as she had months ago. She wanted to remain there forever; she needed the man that was staring at her. A tender smile sprung to his lips as he, once again, wiped the tears from her face. Molly did not move her eyes from him.

“ You know that there are lots of rumors about us in Virginia City,” she said softly, charmed by his eyes. Adam nodded as he gently moved some tresses away from her face, placing them behind her ear.  “ Many people think that you are having a good time with me. That you are playing with me.”
Molly paused to breath as her own feelings took her breath away. Adam frowned.

“ Do you really think that’s true?” he asked shaken by what she said. Molly shrugged and moved her eyes away from him. “ Look at me, Molly” he asked. She did.
Adam studied her face for a few seconds. His heart was galloping fast and his stomach trembled. The moment to talk had come. He could feel it. “How can I convince you that they are wrong,” he asked softly. Molly shrugged her shoulders again. Her eyes were fixed on his and Adam sensed her fear and distrust. He wanted to take her in his arms and kissed her. He was about to do it when a knocked in the door broke the magic moment between them. He twisted his mouth and walked towards the main door.

Jeremy Wheeler was standing in the middle of the porch carrying two huge boxes.

“ Sorry Mr. Cartwright, but Miss Molly asked me to bring this into the house for her,” Jeremy said dryly struggling to keep himself under control. Adam nodded without paying attention to him and told Jeremy to leave the boxes on the coffee table. “ Miss Molly, I left all the supplies with Hop Sing, “ he said kindly when he saw her in the settee. She smiled and nodded. Jeremy frowned and moved near her after leaving the boxes on the coffee table. “ Are you all right Miss Molly? You look sad.”

“ I’m fine Jeremy,” she replied. “ Thanks for asking.”

Adam twisted his mouth irked by the way Wheeler was staring at her. He did not like the way men looked at her and he was determined to stop that.  He walked near Molly and fixed his dark eyes on Jeremy.

“ Anything else Jeremy?” he said firmly showing Jeremy that he must leave. Jeremy shook his head and moved toward the main entrance. “ Jeremy will you please get the buggy ready,” Adam asked while Jeremy was reaching the entrance door.

“ Sure Mr. Cartwright,” Jeremy replied sharply and walked out of the house.
While they were alone again, Adam sat by her side. Molly was studying him, trying to guess what he had in mind. He smiled, and his eyes were bright as stars in the middle of the night.

“ Do you want to have lunch with me?” Adam asked while he took Molly’s hands. “ There’s a wonderful place I want you to see.”

“ You are always an enigma to me Adam,” she said softly. “ And it hurts. I’m not sure that I want to believe you.”

Adam passed an arm around her shoulders. “ Give me the chance to show you that I’m not playing with you,” he said tenderly. “ I want to settle everything between us, clear everything. And I don’t want any interruptions.”

Molly did not smile, but nodded.

Jeremy watched Adam drive the buggy out of the yard. Molly was silently seated by his side. Jeremy frowned as he remembered that she had told him that she was not feeling well. Did she lie to me, he wondered, of course not, but that Cartwright had the art to convince her of anything. Jeremy felt the rage go out. He had to do something to stop Adam Cartwright. Perhaps the solution is to kill him, he thought and grinned. He sought out his horse after deciding that he would follow them.

~~EIGHT~~

Adam drove the buggy across a narrow path bordered by pines. Molly glanced around puzzled and without taking her eyes from the surroundings, she asked him where they were going. Adam smiled and looked at her from the corner of his eyes.

“ Only three people know about this place,” Adam said with deep soft voice. “ I found it one afternoon after I came back from college.” His voice became dreamy and far away. Molly studied his handsome face with amusement noticing that he was lost in his memories. “ It’s my favorite place on the ranch. Each time I needed to be alone and make up my mind about something, I found my refuge here.” Adam paused wandering around his memories. Suddenly he raised his hand pointing the view that appeared in front of them.  “ Look.”

It was the most beautiful sight of the lake Molly had ever seen. Adam stopped the buggy at the edge of a ravine, where they remained in silence for a couple of minutes staring at the wonderful landscape. The ravine leaded to an open field, which was partly forest and ended at the shore of Tahoe. Molly raised her eyes and contemplated the majestic Tahoe escorted by the luxuriant green trees.

Adam came down from the buggy and turned to her. “  There’s a way to get down there with the horses, but it’s further,” commented Adam while he helped her down. “ There is a path here where we can go down.”

“ It’s so beautiful Adam,” she said.

He nodded with a smile, while he passed an arm across her back. “ You know, years ago I was about to get married,” Adam started saying, and once more she saw him lost himself in his memories. “ I wanted to have my place, where I would live with my family.” He paused and snorted. “ I want my own Ponderosa, I want to built up my own dream. So I started to built my house.”

“ Here?” asked Molly almost in a murmur. Adam smiled as he shook his head.

“ Nope.  I loved her but not enough to sacrifice this place,” he replied and Molly noticed the edge of satisfaction hidden behind his feelings. “I made the right choice, she did not love me.”

Molly surrounded his waist with both arms wondering how she could not love him. She looked up at him.  He was lost somewhere as if thousands of dreams and memories of his early youth came to him. Adam sighed and the smile that slowly sprung in his lips lit his handsome face. He lowered his eyes to her.

“ Well Mr. Cartwright, what are we doing here?” she asked with mischief. Impulsively, Adam embraced her and kissed her strongly. “ I’m not sure if that’s the answer I was expecting,”  Molly said and pressed her lips together.

Adam laughed out loud and for the first time since she met him, Molly saw an Adam Cartwright full of happiness. She smiled as she realized that Adam was able to make the sun shine only for her when he let that wonderful fresh laughter spring. The distress and confusion she felt only minutes ago completely vanished.

 “ Come on,” he said like an anxious kid while he took the basket with the lunch from the buggy.

In spite of the wild vegetation there was a footpath, which helped them find the way down. Molly was walking behind him wondering if Adam had made the footpath through the years.  When they reached the field, Adam left the basket under a huge tree and moved to the shore. Molly followed him with her eyes. She watched him move around, fill his lungs with the fresh air and let his deepest dreams rise to the surface. If Molly needed something to help her to erase her doubts regarding his feelings, at that moment she felt herself surrounded by answers. Mostly words were not necessary with Adam, especially if it was about his feelings and he always surprised her. And there he was, standing in the middle of the field, so full of dreams and life. The deepest she knew him, the deepest she loved him.

Adam turned his gaze at Molly and his eyes smiled shouting with each blink how much he loved her. Molly walked to him and Adam took her in his arms, pulling her tight against his body. He lowered his face to her and kissed her freely.

 “ I want you to tell me your dreams,” Molly said and a huge smile broke into her lips. “ Do you want to share them with me Adam.”

Adam nodded happily. Without taking his arm from her shoulder, he made her turn to face the ravine. He raised one hand and pointing the place he had chosen began to talk. He described the design of the frontage of the house and the main room, where they would have a comfortable living room, a great dinning room and a study where he could work and keep all his books. Finally, he mentioned the upper floor with at least five bedrooms. The words came out from his mouth as if he had opened the doors of his dreams like he never did before. Adam spoke uncontrollably but he was so precise, that Molly could see the house as if it was already built.  He paused and sighed. He faced her and gently caressed her beautiful face. He slid an arm around her waist and held her in silence. Her body trembled before his eyes, as she let her hands rest in his arms. Adam studied her face in a way he had not done before. He ran a finger lightly over her cheek. Her skin was soft and smooth; her brown hair was like silk in his fingers. Adam seized upon her freshness and sip-by-sip he drank her beauty.  Molly did not move. It was so nice to feel his fingers against her skin, his mouth so close to her, his body pressed against her. She wanted him to keep on touching her and never stop.

“ Adam…” His name came out of her mouth begging. “ You are driving me crazy,” she whispered as her heart beat faster entering into a rhythmic gallop. He gently kissed her cheek and she raised her eyes seeking his mouth.

“ Shhhhhhh,” he said. He lowered his hand to her neck and softly caressed it with the tip of his fingers. He wanted to travel every inch of her; he did not want to stop. He was feeling again, he was remembering how to feel again, remembering how good it could be. She trembled against his body as her breath became swift.  She was seized by a sensation that she could not resist and there was only one thing she was sure of, she wanted him badly.

“ You rescued me Molly, you brought me back to life.” His voice was deep, full of all the feelings he always hid so well. “ I want to share everything with you. My life, my days and nights, but above all I want you to be part of my dreams.” His voice came all the way from the bottom of his heart. He kissed her passionately. He briefly set his lips apart from her. “ I want you to walk by my side the rest of my life. What do you say?”

“ I say yes,” Molly answered and impulsively she clung to his neck laughing happily.

Adam lifted her and carried her towards the edge of the ravine without moving his lips from her. He gently laid her in the ground under the shadow of a huge ombu. Her smiling radiant face was inviting and Adam slowly leaned on her pressing his lips against hers. Their lips melted in a strong long kiss, letting the feelings flew. They drowned in their love and attraction, freeing their fantasies and desire. Passion wrapped them, making them forget everything but themselves.

Jeremy watched them from the top of the ravine. With each kiss Adam gave her, Jeremy’s anger increased. He raised the rifle he was carrying in his arm and pointed towards them.  He clearly saw Adam’s forehead. He grinned. It will be pretty easy to kill you right now Cartwright, but I won’t do it. I want you to suffer, I want to see you bleeding, begging. Jeremy lowered his gun and moved towards his horse. He did not want to go on watching. It was too frustrated and he could not stand feeling himself frustrated. He was aware that he was not able to control his temper when he got that way. He could not take any risk. Not before he killed Adam Cartwright.



~~NINE~~

Ben Cartwright was beginning to worry. It was getting dark and he did not have the least idea where Molly and Adam were. Suddenly it did not seem to be a good idea to let them alone.

Ben walked in front of the fireplace, sipping his coffee wondering where they could be. Joe and Hoss watched him with bemusement, without understanding why he was so worried.

“ Calm down Pa” said Hoss pretending seriousness. “ I’m sure that they are having a great time together. On the other hand, it was your idea to leave them alone in the house. And this is result of it.”

“ I don’t understand why they left the house,” grumbled Ben. He shook his head.

“ Maybe they did not want any unexpected interruption,” muttered Joe with mischief, while he winked at Hoss.

Ben frowned while he fixed his eyes on his youngest son. He was about to say something when Matt appeared at the top of the staircase. Cautiously placing his hand on the railing Matt came downstairs. As soon as he reached the main room, he ran to his grandpa.  Ben lifted him and sat the boy on his lap.

“ Where are Daddy and Molly?” he asked.

“ That’s exactly what I want to know,” Ben mumbled and grimaced. He caressed Matt’s face gently and frowned. “ You should be sleeping by now.

“ I don’t want to sleep,” was his quick reply. Matt glanced around and his eyes stopped on his Uncle Hoss, who was rubbing his stomach twisting his face.” Uncle

Hoss, can we go to look for some cookies?”

A smile brightened Hoss face as he nodded eagerly.  Joe snorted a laugher reminding his brother that he had dinner only half an hour ago. Hoss shrugged and extended his hand to his nephew. Together they walked towards the kitchen.

Ben rose and after taking the coffeepot, he refilled his cup. Laughter coming from the porch grasped their attention.  He left his cup over the coffee table and strode towards the entrance door.  As soon as he opened the door, he found Adam and Molly kissing madly in the middle of the porch. Joe was a few steps behind his father and both of them stared at Adam and Molly numb and full of astonishment. Suddenly the magnitude of the kiss made them turn their gaze away. Ben cleared his throat bringing them back to Earth.

“ Oh, you are there,” said Adam confidently. He turned at them without taking his arm from Molly’s waist. He raised his eyebrow with arrogance as his face clearly asked them what were they doing standing there. “ Watching?” he added dryly and sarcastically.

Ben twisted his mouth and looked at Joe over his shoulder, then turned his look back to his elder son. Adam sighed and winked to Molly. She smiled with complicity. He took her by her hand and walked into the house avoiding Ben’s and Joe’s astonished eyes.

Matt appeared running from the kitchen. His mouth was full with chocolate cookies, while Hoss walked a few steps behind, carrying a plate with more cookies. As soon as Adam saw Matt, he placed one knee on the floor and opened his arms expecting his son.  Matt threw himself against his father and automatically Adam lifted him.

“ Where have you been?” he asked innocently. “ We were worried.”

“ Worried? why?”  said Adam pretending surprise while he moved towards the settee. “You ought to be sleeping.”

Matt twisted his mouth and over his father’s shoulder he looked at Molly who was looking at him tenderly. “ Molly, will you tell me a story?”

“ Sure honey,” she replied with sweetness and emotion. She took Matt from Adam’s arms. Molly and Adam exchanged a brief glance full of unspoken messages.

“ I’ll be with you in a minute,” muttered Adam softly. Molly nodded while she walked towards the staircase.

Ben and his youngest sons watched the scene and once Molly disappeared in the upper floor, their gazes turned to Adam. His eyes had an odd brightness; an easy smile was dancing on his lips. Joe winked at Hoss and both moved close to their older brother. Unconsciously Adam sighed and that was the invitation Joe and Hoss were waiting for to jump all over him.

“What have you two been doing?” Joe asked Adam.

Adam folded his arms while he raised an eyebrow. He glanced arrogantly at Joe, whose green flashing eyes were eagerly looking at him. Then he glanced at Hoss and noticed his face full of amusement.  Hoss nodded and snorted. Adam shook his head and sighed arrogantly. His eyes met his father’s gaze and he noticed that he was wondering the same.

“ Man, use your imagination,” he said sarcastically. He moved towards the table where the brandy was. “ I don’t think that I should have to explain you two these things,” he added arrogantly while he poured a glass of brandy. He was about to tease his father, but decided to leave it there.

Joe and Hoss twisted their faces with disgust. They turned their eyes to Ben, and Joe jerked his head towards his brother, asking for his father’s intervention. Ben shrugged and rubbed his jaw thinking on the best way to get something from his hermetic son. Adam sipped his brandy knowing exactly what was happening behind his back. He was having a good time with them. He saw his father approaching hesitantly and Adam pressed his lips together struggling to contain the smile that was fighting to break into his lips.

“ Son, is there anything you want to tell us?” Ben asked while he filled a glass with brandy. Adam hid his amusement behind his glass and turned to her father. He frowned pretending to search in his mind for something important he should tell. He twisted his mouth and slowly shook his head. He moved to the blue chair and sat there. Arrogantly, he leaned back while he crossed his legs, showing all of them his best poker face. Adam was playing with his brandy, pretending not to notice that Joe and Hoss had their eyes fixed on him.  He could bet that his brothers would not give up that easy, so he was not surprised when he saw them surrounding him.

At that moment, Matt appeared at the top of the stair calling his father. Adam rose and smiled openly. He left his glass over the coffee table and walked towards staircase.

“ Daddy, are you going to marry Molly?” he asked eagerly.

Adam frowned while he placed his hands on his hips. “ I cannot believe she told you.” Adam knew it was a mistake as the words came out of his mouth. Well, I certainly cannot deny it, he thought.

“ Molly did not say anything to me,” Matt answered with astonishment and his eyes began to grow. “ You told me yesterday that we will talk about it today,” he explained and suddenly his face turned from surprised to happiness, as he understood what his father was trying to keep as a secret.

“ Well done, big Daddy,” Molly said with a huge smile. “ Fortunately, you suggested to wait to tell them,” she added with teasing tone, but her eyes were full of emotion. Molly lifted Matt and the boy surrounded her neck with his arms. “ Come on baby.”

“ So, you are going to be my mom,” he asked her still shaken by the news.

“ Let’s go to bed,” Molly answered tenderly. “ It’s too late for you.”

Adam tried to follow them, but two hands took him by his shoulders stopping him. He twisted his mouth and turned to face his two anxious brothers and his thrilled father.

“ Well, you just heard it,” he simply said as a shy smile broke onto his lips while he rubbed the back of his neck.

Hoss passed an arm around his older brother shoulders and was the first one to congratulate him. Joe shook Adam ´s hand firmly while he slapped his brother’s arm.  Ben stared at him smiling.

“ Well Pa, you will have the wedding you always wanted at the Ponderosa,” he said proudly and a huge smile sprung in his lips.

Ben’s eyes filled with tears as he was deeply touched to see his first born so full of happiness.  Adam walked to him and Ben embraced him slapping gently his back.

“ I’m so happy for you Adam,” Ben said placing both hands on Adam’s shoulders.

Molly came downstairs and smiled when he heard Joe and Hoss teasing Adam.

“ Give him a break,” she said amusingly and laughed. She moved closer to them and passed an arm around Adam’s waist. He smiled at her lovingly and passed an arm around her shoulders pulling her closer to him. “ By the way, you three are not going to congratulate me. I think I did a pretty good job, catching Adam.”

Even Adam laughed out loud and let his brothers take Molly away from him.

“ We have a lot to do if we are having a wedding at the ranch,” Ben said while he hand out the glass to his sons and Molly. He raised his glass to them. “Cheers.”


~~TEN~~

As Adam did years ago, he asked his father for the supplies of wood he needed to build his house. But this time, Ben insisted that Joe and Hoss helped his brother on it.  The slightest idea of Adam working alone brought bad memories to Ben’s mind. It seemed that Adam felt the same way, because he did he didn’t resist the offer.
Adam was giving a final glance to the drawings he had done, when Molly brought him a cup of coffee. He was going to start working on their home that morning and he was a bit nervous as well as anxious. Molly passed an arm around his waist leaning her head over his shoulder.  With a thoughtful expression, he passed an arm around her shoulders and silently they contemplated the drawings. Joe and Hoss came into the house and joined them.

“ The wagon is ready, Adam,” Hoss told his brother when he reached him.

“ And Sport is also saddled,” added Joe.

As they did not receive any reply they fixed their eyes on Adam’s drawings.

“ It’s beautiful Adam,” Hoss said with a smile. “ You really know how to draw.”

“ Well, Hoss I’m an engineer and also have a degree in Architecture,” replied Adam proudly. “ The funny thing would be if I did not know how to do it.”

Hoss nodded and pressed his lips together full of admiration. “ Promise me you’ll do this for me when I decided to get married.”

“ Of course, Hoss,” said Adam full of satisfaction. He slapped his brother’s back and smiled openly. “ It’ll be my pleasure to do it brother.”

“ Come on, I want to start with this,” Joe interrupted them eagerly. “ The sooner we start, the sooner your home will be finished.”

Adam nodded and quickly gathered the drawings. Molly walked with them outside and said good-bye to them from the porch. She glanced around suddenly seized by the feeling that someone was watching her, but the yard was deserted as all the hands were attending different chores around the ranch. Nevertheless she had the feeling that somebody was watching her. She shrugged and walked back into the house.

Before starting with her own chores, Molly went to Ben’s desk to fetch the cup of coffee that Adam had used. A rolled paper gasped her attention. She took it and recognized Adam’s drawing and numbers. Molly shook her head, wondering if Adam would need it. She made up her mind while she walked towards the staircase.
Only five minutes later Molly came back to the main room dressed with suitable clothes for riding. She took the drawing from the desk and strode out of the house. Molly hesitated a few seconds as she realized that there was not a single hand to help her saddle Handsome. Not even Hop Sing was in the house. She saw Sport tied to the front post and Molly looked at him knowing that it was the best choice she had, however Adam would never approve of it. She shrugged and walked towards the horse.

Molly mounted Sport skillfully and caressed his neck in a friendly way. It was not a secret that Sport was a spirited temperamental horse, hard to ride and handle.

“ You are a lot like your master, aren’t you boy?” she said with a smile as she caressed his neck.

Sport entered a gallop as soon as Molly touched him with her heels and Molly realized at once that everything she had heard about Adam’s horse was true. Sport was really hard to handle, but he was fast as a ray and nimble like a cat. In the distance, Molly saw the wagon and Cochise that easily trotted by its side.  She smiled and made Sport ran faster.

Joe was the first one to hear the wild gallop of the horse. He glanced around and frowned once he noticed that it was his brother’s horse.

“ Adam, somebody is riding Sport,” he said puzzled. Hoss stopped the wagon abruptly, while suddenly alert Adam turned to see over his shoulder the horse that was running towards them. “ He is running madly.” Joe commented.

Adam’s face became pale as he realized that was Molly who was riding his horse.

“ What the hell is she doing?” he yelled angrily and jumped out of the wagon.
Molly stopped Sport a few yards away from them, and the horse shook his head bothered by the interruption. With tight elegant trot, Molly made him move near the boys.  She gave them her best smile and glanced at Adam proudly. Molly took the rolled paper from an inner pocket of her vest and gave it to Adam who was already standing next to her.

“ You forgot this drawing on the desk,” she mentioned as if nothing odd was happening.

“ What the hell are you doing on this horse,” he asked sharply while he took the paper she was giving him. Molly frowned with annoyance by the way he was addressing her. She straightened with determination and firmly gripped the reins. Sport tossed restless. “ Easy boy,” said Adam slapping Sport’s neck. “ Get down, Molly,” he ordered her.

“ Don’t talk to me that way,” she said without hiding her annoyance. “ Sport was the only horse saddled and there’s nobody there to help me saddle Handsome.”

“ But, Molly this horse is too dangerous for you, you know that,” he said full of exasperation at her lack of sense. Adam looked at Joe over his shoulder and asked him to carry Molly back to the ranch.  

“ Wait a minute Adam, and stop being bossy,” Molly interrupted him abruptly. “ Joe is not going to carry me to the ranch, I can do it by myself.”

Joe crossed his arms over the hook of his saddle as he smiled with amusement. He loved to witness an argument between Adam and Molly.  He glanced at Hoss and noticed that his brother was enjoying it too. Adam stretched his arms to get Molly off the horse, but she refused to do it.

“ OK, Molly, let’s do it this way,” Adam finally said tired of fighting with her. “ I’ll ride you home and then ride all the way back.”

Molly smiled with satisfaction and nodded, while Adam shook his head with resignation. He mounted Sport knowing that she had achieved her purpose. He shifted behind her and gently took the reins from her hands. Molly leaned back against him and smiled triumphantly at Hoss and Joe.

“ Well done, Molly” Joe said with teasing tone. “ You certainly showed us who’s the boss of the couple.”

Molly raised her loving eyes to Adam. He was looking at her with tenderness, but frowned pretending seriousness. “ You are cute,” she said, while she stretched her neck and kissed his cheek. Adam smiled at her.

“ Cute?” said Joe loudly and outburst a laugher. “ There are lots of adjectives that describes brother Adam, but cute….”

“ He is cute for me,” Molly said gently caressing Adam’s arms.

“ Ok, that’s enough,” Adam said moving Sport away from the wagon. “ I’ll see you two later.”

“ OK cute brother,” Joe answered winking at Hoss. “But don’t make us wait too long.”

When Adam and Molly entered the yard, Molly once again sensed that someone was watching at her. She mentioned it to Adam, but he did not take her seriously.

“ It must be me,” he answered placing his chin over her shoulder. His nose played with her silk hair and gently began to kiss her neck. “ I’m the one that cannot take my eyes off you.”

“ I like that,” she said feeling his lips against her neck. “ But you have a house to build, Mr. Cartwright.”

Adam twisted his mouth and get off Sport. He helped her dismounted. “ One last kiss and I’ll leave to build our house,” he said with pleading voice. He kissed her long and strong. Then he set apart and smiled. “ We are coming back for lunch.”

Molly nodded and watched him mount and moved away. She sighed and glanced around the yard before entering the house.

~~ELEVEN~~

Molly had the table ready for lunch. The Cartwrights should be there at any minute. She was waiting them anxiously. She was restless, overwhelmed by an odd disturbing feeling. Ben and Matt were the first to appear and break the silence of the house. Ben was sending Matt to wash his hands when Molly reached them. He frowned as he noticed how tense she was.

“ Is there any problem Molly?” he asked concerned.

“ I don’t know Ben,” she answered hugging herself. “ I have a hunch, that’s all.” Ben snorted a laugher while he shook his head. He passed an arm over her shoulder leading her to the settee. “ I think you are nervous because of the wedding and the house,” Ben said gently. “ Did the boys arrive?”

“ No, and I was wondering why they did not arrive yet,” she said with annoyance. She rose when she heard laughter coming from the porch. “ Here they are.”

Joe and Hoss came into the house laughing. Molly frowned and walked next to them. “ Molly if you are going to keep Adam away from working, you are never going to have your house ready,” he said with a teasing tone. “ Where are you big brother?”

“ Adam left me here and rode to meet you. He did not even came into the house,” Molly commented frightened. The smiles vanished from Hoss and Joe’s faces.

They exchanged worried glances wondering what could have happen to Adam. Ben walked next to them and asked Molly if Adam had mentioned that he would stop somewhere else. Molly shook her head negatively. “ We have to find him, Ben,” she said with desperation placing both hands on his arms as her eyes filled with tears.
“ Don’t worry dear,” said Ben softly controlling his own concern. “ You stay here just in case Adam appears. We’ll find him.”

Ben turned to Hoss and Joe and saw that they were ready to go. He nodded and took his hat and gunbelt from Hoss’s hands. The three of them strode out of the house. While they were mounting their horses, Ben asked them what they thought about Adam’s disappearance. Joe was the first to speak. He told his father that Adam was too anxious to start working on his house to turn his mind to something else.

“ Yeah Pa, I think that Molly is right,” Hoss added full of concerned. “ Something might have happened to him.

Molly was getting crazy waiting. She needed to do something to help. She made up her mind and strode into the kitchen where Hop Sing was speaking out loud to Matt in some Chinese words she could not understand. She was sure that he was struggling to keep Matt’s mind away from what was happening. Molly interrupted Hop Sing monologue asking him to take care of Matt, while she was looking for Adam. Hop Sing tried to stop her, but Molly’s determination was strong. Helplessly he watched her mount Handsome and go out of the yard almost in a gallop.

Molly rode Handsome madly without knowing in which direction she was going. The Ponderosa was huge and Adam could be anywhere.  Please Lord, send me a sign where to start, she prayed almost in tears. The slightest idea that something dangerous happened to Adam made her heart stopped beating. She could not stand losing him.

Molly had wandered around the ranch for almost twenty minutes without seeing anything odd in the surroundings. She did not even see Ben or the boys, but suddenly in the distance, Molly saw Sport grazing near some trees.   Molly stopped Handsome and glanced around. There was not a sign of Adam. She urged her horse to move fast towards Sport. Once she got there she got off Handsome and ran to Adam’s horse.

“ Easy Sport, it’s me,” she said while she took him by his reins. Sport tossed violently but calmed down once he felt Molly’s hand caressing his ears. “Good boy. Let me see you.”

Molly studied the horse looking for something. Tears rolled down her face when she saw the blood on one side of the saddle. Before her inexpert eyes, the horse did not seem to have run lately, so she arrived at the conclusion that maybe Adam was near. She took the rifle from Adam’s saddle and walked towards the woods.
Molly did not know how long she had been walking through the woods, when she suddenly saw Jeremy Wheeler sharpening a big knife. Molly caught her breath and hid herself behind a huge tree. He was madly waving the knives. Jeremy moved out of her sight, so she moved behind another tree. Then she saw Adam, lying on the ground tied to a tree. He seemed to be at the edge of unconsciousness. His shirt had been removed and his naked torso was mostly covered with blood. Molly covered her mouth with one hand as her eyes filled with tears.

Jeremy was waving the knife near Adam’s face. “ You don’t look so confident now, Adam,” Jeremy was saying with a mix of irony and anger while he made a small cut on Adam’s injured arm. Adam screamed loudly while he twisted his face struggling to control the pain. “ I’m going to cut your head away from your body. It will be a nice picture of yours.” Jeremy laughed out loud. Madness completely covered his face.  “ The arrogant Adam Cartwright without his smart high head.”  He laughed again and slowly slid the sharp knife across Adam’s neck and grinned when he saw the blood spring from the thin cut. “ We are going to wait Adam, I want you to meet Death face to face. I want you to feel how she is, how she takes your life little by little.” Adam mumbled something twisting his face in pain. “ Not even the Lord will save you from this.” Jeremy laughed out loud again and moved away from Adam.

Those words echoed in Molly’s head. Suddenly she was surrounded by darkness. She was blind in pain and Jeremy Wheeler was all she could see. Molly came out of the woods and walked towards Jeremy who was playing with his knife. She took him by surprise, but she did not notice it, nor did she hear him ordering her to stop. She pointed the rifle at him, ready to fire.

“ You killed him,” she shouted with lack of emotions. “ You killed Rafael.”

“ Molly don’t” shouted Adam desperately struggling to free himself.  He screamed because of the pain and closed his eyes.

But Molly did not hear him, she was not even aware that he was there covered by his own blood. She shot and kept on shooting without being able to stop as once and again repeated that he had killed Rafael.

A few minutes later, Ben followed by both of his sons came running from the woods. They had found Sport and Handsome a minute before they heard the shootings. Ben had his heart in his throat, but his face turned to a mask of horror when he saw Adam covered by blood tied to a tree and Molly shooting the dead body of Jeremy Wheeler, even though there were no more bullets in the rifle.

Without wasting time, Joe and Hoss passed next to their father towards Adam. Both of them untied him and helped him to sit up. As far as they could tell, Adam had been shot in one arm and his torso was full of bleeding injuries. Adam was dizzy, struggling to keep himself conscious. Joe and Hoss moved him towards a tree where he could rest and gave him some water. They both raised their eyes in bewilderment to their father.

Ben was walking cautiously near Molly, but she did not seem to notice any of them. Not even Adam.  Her eyes were fixed on Wheeler’s dead body as a mad expression covered her sweet face. Ben gently removed the gun from her shaking hands and she simply let it go. Slowly she turned her face to Ben, but he was not sure that she was seeing him.

“ He killed Rafael and the others,” she mumbled as the tears rolled down her face.

Abruptly she began to shake and fell into her knees covering her face with both hands.  An instant later she was crying sorrowfully and saying things none of the Cartwrights could understand.

“ Adam, where are you?” she shouted with desperation. “ Adam…” And her voice showed the increasing anguish with each second that passed. Over his own bewilderment and pain, Adam managed to drag himself towards her. “Where are you?.” She was at the edge of hysteria now. Adam surrounded her with his arm and pulled her to him. Desperately she clung to his neck. “ Please hold me. I’m scared.”

“ Shhhhh,” he said rubbing her back. “ I’m here my love. I’m here.” Adam closed his eyes struggling to keep the increasing pain under control.

Ben knelt next to him and placed one hand on Adam’s shoulder offering him his support. He raised his gaze and asked Joe to ride to Virginia City and looked for Paul Martin and Roy Coffee. Joe nodded and ran towards the woods where he had left Cochise.

“  Come on honey,” said Adam gently. “ Look at me Molly.”

“ Constance, my name is Constance Leod, not Molly” she said unexpectedly and pressed herself against Adam.

THE END
PART 2


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