The Ties that Bind
Written by Mary Stone

CHAPTER 1
The young man held his horse to a dancing trot as he made
the long familiar ride into town. He was absorbed in thought,
looking all around, taking in sights he knew by heart but never
tired of. He tried to remember how old he had been the first
time he had made the trip alone, ten, twelve? It was such a long
time ago it was hard to even remember what the purpose of the
first trip had been.
He had not lived in this territory all his life, only his
youngest brother had been born here. He himself, the oldest of
three boys, had been born in Boston. His mother had been
Elizabeth Stoddard, daughter of New England sea Captain Abel
Stoddard. And she had married the young man who had served with
him, Benjamin Cartwright, now a prominent and well respected
businessman here in Nevada territory. And the young man who rode
with ease, was his son Adam Cartwright. Adam's mother had died
shortly after his birth, and not much later Ben took his infant
son and journeyed west, leaving the sea behind, and never looking
back.
Adam was thirty one now and his father's right hand man. Ben
often credited much of his success to his eldest son's careful
business mind. Adam was often tenacious about things he believed
in, it was a stubborness his father admired, most of the time.
Adam enjoyed these ventures off the ranch as it gave him a
chance to catch up on news, and with old friends. The
Cartwrights were well known throughout the territory, and for the
most part were always welcomed with enthusiasm. Spring was
nearly upon them so these trips would soon become scarce,
therefore he intended to stay awhile when he got there.
When he was a boy he had found the trips to town very
exciting. The town was alive with people and noisy with
progress. But after he had attended college in the east, he felt
the towns here were behind the times. They could not compare to
the excitement of the New England atmosphere. Sometimes Adam
could not shake the feeling that he was missing out on what was
happening in the world. In the west he was isolated and out of
touch, he longed to be in the midst of it all. But at the same
time he felt a great obligation to his family, his father counted
on him. In fact the selling point of his going to college was
the idea that the knowledge he would gain would be a great asset
to the ranch. So often Adam felt restless, the wanderlust
pulling at his heart. But today he felt relaxed, he had things
to do, he had to pick up the mail, stop at the mercantile, and
maybe stop at the saloon for a drink, and maybe visit with some
friends before heading home.
He could hear the town before he could see it, and he could
feel a quick rush of excitement. He tightened the reins just a
little and brought Prince down to a trot again as he rode up the
street already bustling with people. A few people stopped to
wave or say hello. A few stopped to talk a minute and after
exchanging greetings Adam crossed the street to the post office.
"Any mail for us Charlie?" he asked the clerk. Collecting the
mail he walked back to his horse and put it in his saddlebags.
>From there he walked his horse to the mercantile to pick up
tobacco for his father. On his way out he ran into his good
friend Bill Enders, who invited him to dinner. Adam explained he
wouldn't be in town that long.
"Why don't you join me for drink over to the saloon?" Adam
offered
"Sorry Buddy, I gotta meet Hiram Wood in about ten
minutes,maybe next time. See ya Adam"
Adam was dissapointed but it couldn't be helped. He untied
his horse and started walking to the saloon. After the long ride
into town he preferred walking around town.
It was just about 1:00 pm when he walked through the swinging
doors, but it was already filled with people and smoke. He
walked up to the bar, ordered a beer and went to find an empty
table. He found a copy of the Territorial Enterprise and took it
with him.
He found a table and began leafing through the paper. The
noise behind him became a buzz, when suddenly he heard his name.
"Adam Cartwright, what the hell are you doing here?"
Adam turned to face a vaguely familiar man whose name escaped
him. The man was leaning on the table a broad smile on his face.
"Oh come on Adam, don't tell me you don't remember me?" Adam
struggled for the man's name in his mind, but the man filled him
in.
"College in the east, Clifton Donovan the third"
The name sent a chill up his back as memory flooded in.
They'd been friends until Adam had turned him into the Dean for
cheating on exams. He was then expelled from the college and
disowned by his wealthy New England family. Adam had wondered
what had become of him. He looked road weary and well traveled.
Clifton pulled up a chair and sat down, an amused expression on
his face.
"So is this where you live now Adam?"
Adam leaned back and studied his former friend's face.
"I live outside of town on the family ranch Clif" he stated.
"Ah yes the family homestead, I forgot. God knows you talked
about it enough. But I guess we both talked about our families
and our homes, and all that was waiting for us, didn't we?"
Adam nodded, curious now as to what Clif wanted.
"You know my family had big plans for me. I was gonna work
with my father and then take over the company eventually. My
father died about six years ago, my brother Charles in in charge
now, and he has four sons of his own. I even heard he named one
of them Clifton, after my father of course. I suspect Clifton
the fourth will accomplish what Clifton the third hadn't."
He looked at Adam who was expressionless and silent, not the
reaction Clif had hoped for. Then Adam leaned forward and sipped
his beer, cupped his hands around the mug, and said.
"So what are you doing these days Clif, what brings you to
Virginia City?"
This brought a quick smile and almost too eager response,
"Why I've traveled all over the country Adam, seen more towns
than most people see in a lifetime. I can't stay in one place
too long you know"
"Oh why's that Clif?" Adam said biting at the obvious bait.
"Well because Adam, I can't remember which parts of the
territory I'm wanted in" he stated proudly.
Adam gave a half grin, "Oh I see, you're quite the outlaw now
are you?"
"Yes I am and I have you to thank for that Adam?"
Adam frowned and took another swig of beer
"Oh come on Clifton, every man is responsible for his own
actions and his own destiny"
Clifton's expression changed, and giving Adam a stony stare he
shoved his chair back, and took a drink of Adam's beer.
"Oh yeah, well we'll see about that won't we" He pushed the
mug back toward Adam and said, "See you around Adam" and walked
out of the saloon.
Adam watched him go and sat for a few minutes reflecting on
the situation. After a minute of so he convinced himself that he
was harmless and rose to head on home.
He reached the road leading to the ranch and contemplated what
to do, he thought about going back to the house but he didn't
really want to see his father at the moment so he decided to skip
lunch and go back out to the branding pens and rejoin his
brothers.
He saw the clouds of dust all around the pens and was relieved
he had something to do to distract himself. He searched throught
the dust for his younger brother and spotting him rode up
alongside him.
"Hey Adam, glad to see you found your way back, want a job?"
"That depends what have you got for me?" Adam said
" Now you don't think for one minute I'd give my big brother a
job he couldn't handle do ya?"
Adam smiled with affection at him, he was indeed Adam's
younger brother, but you wouldn't know it looking at him. He not
only was taller, but he outweighed Adam by more than sixty
pounds. His given name was Eric, but a nickname his Uncle Gunnar
had suggested had stayed with him. Everyone called him Hoss,
which was a mountain term for a big friendly man, and that was
Hoss. He stood six foot four and weighed more than two hundred
and fifty pounds. But he was as gentle and kind as he was big,
and people loved him instantly.
" I'll tell you what you take that crew over there and see if
you can round up whatever calves we missed and bring them back
here, can you manage that?" Hoss said good naturedly, Adam knew
he enjoyed being in charge.
" I'll do my best Boss" Adam said and headed in the direction
of the crew. He saw his youngest brother coming towards him with
a deviant smile on his face. His name was Joseph after Ben's
father, and he'd been given the nickname Little Joe as a boy. It
was a name still used in the family and by close friends.
" Hey big brother, you're back. Did those women run you out
of town again?" he said.
He stopped his horse when they were facing in opposite
directions.
"Now Joe you shouldn't express you're envy out loud" Adam
said teasing.
"What in the world would I have to be envious of?"
"You got a couple days and I'll tell you"
Joe gave a short laugh and punched Adam slightly in the arm
and rode off saying, "You are so funny"
Adam watched him go and laughed too, he soon forgot what was
wrorrying him earlier.
********************************
CHAPTER 2
It was nearly dark when the boys returned to the house, later
still by the time they got their horses bedded down for the
night. With all the work to do in the Spring it wasn't unusual
for them to work and eat late.
Their father was waiting for them at the door as they
approached the house. "Well did we get them all tallied up today
boys," he asked.
"Not quite yet Pa", Hoss said, "I don't think we got em all
accounted for, we should finish up tomorrow sometime."
"Good let's get something to eat now, I've been waiting on
you"
They went to the kitchen to wash up then quickly sat down,
gave their thanks, and dug in. For a few minutes the only sounds
were the dishes being passed around as their cook Hop Sing
brought them from the kitchen and placed them on the table. Ben
watched his sons fill their plates, the three of them looking
worn out from a hard days work. He studied each of them briefly
and then froze when he came to Adam. He seemed to be in another
world, absently toying with his food.
"Adam did you pick up the mail today?" Ben asked, no
response.
"Adam did you hear me?" Adam looked up somewhat startled, and
then looked to his father questioning.
" The mail Son, did you get it today?" he asked again.
" Oh yes Sir, I'll get it" He got up from the table and went
out to the barn to retrieve the mail from his saddlebags. While
he was gone Ben questioned his brothers.
"Anything happen today I should know about?"
Hoss and Joe exchanged glances and shrugged
"Nothing out of the ordinary" Joe said with his mouth half
full.
Adam returned and handed his father the mail, then resumed
his seat. He tried to eat but for some reason had no appetite.
He forced himself to eat more then he wanted knowing his father
would question him if he didn't.
"I'm too tired for dessert" he said a few minutes later, "I
think I'll go to my room and read awhile, then go to bed.
Goodnight" and he rose and headed for the stairs, he knew his
father was watching him as he climbed the stairs but he needed to
be alone.
When he reached his room, he sat at his desk and pulled his
boots off. He glanced around the room while rubbing his aching
feet, stopping when he noticed his old college textbooks sitting
on the shelf. He remembered all the hours he spent pouring over
those books, how hard he had worked, the same as most of the
students. Had he been wrong in turning in Clifton Donovan? He
had never questioned before, why was it bothering him now?
He shook his head, got up from the chair and stretched. He
was tired and his whole body ached. He threw himself on the bed
and lay on his back with his hands behind his head. He couldn't
seem to get Donovan off his mind. Was he harmless like Adam had
thought at first? Or was he a wanted man who could be
potentially dangerous? How long was he going to stay in town,
and how long would Adam be able to successfully avoid him?
It was nearly two hours later when Ben walked by his room and
saw the light coming from under the door. He knocked lightly,
and getting no response he opened the door. He found his eldest
son asleep, one arm flung over his head, the other resting on his
chest. Ben stood studying him for a moment, his black hair was
in disarray from sleep, and his face was peaceful. He looked like
a boy again, somehow vulnerable. No longer able to resist the
urge Ben reached out to straighten his hair. As soon as he
touched him, Adam stirred. It took him a minute to realize his
father was there, when he did he quickly sat up.
"What time is it?" he asked sleepily
"Somewhere around eleven I think, I saw your light on"
"Oh sorry, I didn't realize how tired I was"
Adam could feel his father's eyes on him and it made him
uneasy. His father had always had a way of looking right through
him no matter how hard he tried to hide his feelings. He was the
only person that had the ability to do that, and Adam could not
bear to look into those eyes.
"Anything happen in town today, you seem kind've distracted?"
Adam shook his head, studying his hands,
"No just ran my errands, had a drink, came home and went back
to work"
Ben felt his son's forehead, and Adam gave him an embarrased
smile.
"Come on Pa, I'm fine, everything is fine" he assured him
"And you would tell me if there was a problem?"
"Yes I promise" Adam said trying to sound convincing.
Ben straitened up and studied him again.
"Alright then, I'll let you go back to sleep"
Adam lay back down as his father pulled the blanket over him.
Ben paused a moment waiting for Adam to look at him.
"I'm here if you need me, Okay?"
" I know Pa, goodnight" he answered as he wiggled himself down
to a comfortable position.
Ben blew out the lantern and Adam heard him softly say
goodnight and walk out of the room. He lay there for some time
wondering if he was gonna need his father after all. He would
try to avoid involving him at whatever cost.
******************************
CHAPTER 3
Adam continued to see Clifton Donovan every time he went to town for
almost a month. There was no way around it though he was not about to hide
out on the ranch and he really wasn't afraid of him anyway. He figured
Clif had found work somewhere and was planning on staying, but for what
reason Adam didn't know. He found it hard to believe the man was hanging
around for no other reason than to harass him. And when he did confront
Adam it seemed he was trying to get some kind of reation from Adam, and
wasn't succeeding. Adam was a master at keeping a poker face in almost any
situation, and Donovan was finding that out. But he wasn't about to give
up, he didn't really want to harm Adam, but he did want him to squirm a
little. He wanted Adam to know what he had felt. Ideally he would like
Adam to admit his actions had ruined Donovan's life. He had lost
everything important to him, his whole future had been rearranged for him.
He would like to see Adam lose something important to him, but what was
important to Adam Cartwright, that he didn't know.
Clifton Donovan was not the feared outlaw he made himself out to be.
Most of his crimes concerned robberies, which was how he survived. He had
never killed anyone in his life even in cases where he was forced to defend
himself. Adam had begun to realize this too, and he worried less. He
figured he was a patient man and Donovan would move on sooner or later.
However long it took Adam figured he could wait him out, or so he thought.
On Saturday he came to town the first of the month as usual for
supplies. He was walking up the street when Donovan fell in behind him.
"Adam I haven't seen you for awhile, where ya been?"
"Working as usual Clif, the ranch doesn't run itself"
Adam kept walking, he had documents to drop off at the lawyers for his
father, and then he just wanted to go home.
"Yeah it must be nice to have a family and a nice home and all. I
lost all that and can't ever get it back"
Adam didn't say anything, there wasn't anything to say.
"How does it feel to be responsible for a man's loss of his livelihood
Adam?"
" I wouldn't know Clif", Adam said growing impatient. Donovan
suddenly grabbed his arm and swung him around.
"You think you're so high and mighty around here but it don't put you
above the responsibility of what you did to me"
Adam shrugged his arm free and faced him, struggling for control of
his temper.
" When are you going to grow up and face who's really responsible"
Adam growled. Clif was about to respond when they were distracted by a
voice coming towards them.
"Supplies are all loaded Adam, you about ready to go"
Donovan studied the approaching figure and to Adam said,
"Well well, who've we got here?"
Before Adam could say anything, his brother held out his hand.
"Hi, I'm Joe Cartwright, Adam's brother. How are you Sir?"
Donovan shook Joe's extended hand and turned to Adam with a smile. Adam
avoided his glance and looked at his brother instead.
"Adam's brother huh? What a pleasure to meet you. I'm Clifton
Donovan, an old school chum of your brother's"
Donovan realized he may have just found the very thing he'd been
looking for, something that was important to Adam, something that could
bring him to his knees. One look at Adam's face told him he was right, he
saw fear. It was a look that gave him great pleasure. Adam took Joe's arm
and started walking.
"Come on Joe, we gotta get going." As they walked away Donovan
hollered after them.
"Nice to meet you Joe.......hope to see you again."
Joe glanced at his brother who was practically dragging him across the
street. His jaw was set, he was furious, but why?
"Who was that guy Adam?" he asked.
"Never mind, just forget about him." Adam said continuing to pull him
toward the wagon.
"Look Adam, I know he ain't a friend of yours, I saw you practically
hit him. That's why I came over."
Adam stopped walking to face his brother.
"Maybe you should've stayed where you were and minded your own business"
Joe frowned and felt his own anger rising, "What are you yelling at me
for? What the heck did I do?"
Adam let go of his arm and moved his hand to his shoulder. He took a
deep breath forcing himself to calm down.
"Look he's just a guy I knew a long time ago. Just do me a favor and
stay out of his way, ignore him"
Joe glanced in the direction Donovan had gone and said,
"I ain't afraid of him, let him try to start something, I can take him"
This time Adam grabbed him by both arms hard, his eyes flashing.
" I told you to stay away from him, you hear me?"
Joe angrily shook him free and climbed up on the buckboard. He couldn't
stand the way Adam treated him like a child. He wasn't a kid anymore and
he wished just once his brother would treat him like an equal.
Adam stood for a moment with his head down. He had to get control of
himself, he was only making things worse. He was furious with himself and
taking it out on the wrong person. Why did he let Little Joe come into
town with him? Why did he give Donovan the very ammunition he needed? He
had to find a way to keep Joe away from him. He would not let Donovan have
the upper hand.
Adam straightened up and walked to the buckboard climbing into the
seat. He was thoroughly ashamed of himself for hurting Joe and not just
physically. None of this was Joe's fault, they had made this trip together
for years, something they'd always enjoyed. Adam leaned forward to pick up
the reins, sat back and looked at Joe. He was sitting with his head down
looking more hurt than angry, which only made Adam feel even worse.
"Look Joe, I'm sorry I hurt you. It's just this Donovan makes me lose
my temper. It's not you, I'm sorry.......okay?"
Little Joe nodded, unable for the moment to look at his brother. Adam
slapped the reins to the horses and they bolted forward. The brothers
stayed silent for some time both of them lost in their own thoughts. Adam
would occasionally look at Joe, not sure if he'd been forgiven. He felt he
had to say something.
"Donovan and I did go to college together, we were friends. I think it
was more his family's idea for him to attend the college than his. He
wasn't real devoted to his studies, just couldn't seem to apply himself.
And he was the kind of guy who would always look for the easy way out. At
college he cheated on his exams, thought it was real clever of him."
He paused a moment to make sure Joe was listening, he was.
"He used to pay people to do his assignments for him, even tried to get
me to once"
This brought a smile to Joe's face, knowing his brother like he did.
" I overlooked his actions at first, I liked him. But then the others
started noticing what he was doing, so someone was going to turn him in
sooner or later. I just decided to do it before we took our next exams.
Maybe I should've kept my mouth shut, I don't know. I felt responsible for
ignoring it in the beginning"
"Did he ever try to get someone to help him?" Joe asked.
"You mean did I ever offer to help him? Yeah I did and so did a lot of
the others, but he just wasn't willing to make the effort"
"Too bad I know you could've helped him. You helped me with my math
when I thought I'd never get through it."
Adam smiled, he remembered and knew he'd been forgiven.
"You know Joe you can't help someone that doesn't want to be helped"
Joe nodded in agreement then said, "Why didn't he just go to a
different school or just go to work somewhere?"
" Well first of all his father owned a huge lumber business in the area
and story got in the local paper. His father was furious, threw him out of
his house and his life, said he didn't want to look at him"
"So what did he do after that?"
" I don't know, he said his father died a few years ago and his younger
brother took over the business. He claims he's a wanted man but I think
that's just talk."
Joe was thoughtful absorbing the information.
"So what does he want with you now........revenge?"
"I wish I knew, he starts picking at me every time I come into town.
Trying to make me admit I ruined his life or something. I haven't really
felt threatened by him..........."
Adam stopped suddenly and Joe looked up at him.
" .........until today that is." he said finishing the sentence almost
in a whisper. He hated the way his feelings for his family got locked up
somehow. Why was is so hard to just say what he was feeling?
Joe looked straight ahead, he felt the emotion hanging there between
them. He was perfectly aware of how Adam felt about him, he also knew how
hard it was to express it. It was true they got on each other's nerves at
times but most of the time they got along fine. At this moment Joe felt
like a kid again, warm in his older brother's shadow.
"Are you afraid of him?" Joe asked studying Adam's face.
Adam kept his eyes forward and gave a slight shrug.
" You know I never thought you were afraid of anything" Joe said
seriously.
Adam half grinned at that, " That would be a bit unrealistic wouldn't
it? Besides everyone is afraid of something in their life at some time or
another."
Joe was thoughtful again, he could think of several things he had been
and was afraid of but he wasn't going to mention them.
"So what are you afraid of?" he asked Adam.
" I just have one thing that's my absolute worst fear" he stated still
looking at the road ahead.
"Yeah what is it?" Joe asked persistenly
Adam hesitated, he wasn't sure he wanted to continue this
converstation. They were entering an area he seldom talked about. When he
faced his little brother he could tell he was waiting, he sighed deeply and
answered with one word.
"Death"
Joe nodded, yes he too was afraid of that when he thought about it but
at his age he didn't think about it too much. He was rather surprised that
Adam might.
"Yeah I guess everyone is afraid to die"
Adam shook his head and his brother gave him a puzzled look.
"I'm not afraid of dying myself, I'm afraid of someone close to me dying"
Joe quickly looked away, now that was something he hadn't ever really
thought about at all. And now the idea shook him, what would that be like,
he was sure he didn't want to know.
" I'm afraid of that too" he said quietly. Adam could feel something
go out of him and was sorry he mentioned it. He decided to change the subject.
" You know there is a way to solve my problem with Donovan"
Joe looked up at his brother's smiling face.
" Yeah how?" he asked curious.
" I could just introduce him to Hoss"
They both laughed relief flooding over them. The air suddenly seeming
to clear
*********************************
CHAPTER 4
Ben sat at his desk with his chin resting on his hands. He had just
finished his end of the month paperwork, a job he dreaded but was always
filled with satisfaction when it was done. The boys were in the barn
tending the stock for the night. Spring branding was finished and the crews
had been paid off. The timber contracts were finalized and in the next
couple of weeks they'd have to move the horse to Spring pasture and bring
in the two year olds for breaking. It looked like they were going to have
a good bunch to sell this year. All was pointing to a good, profitable year.
He put his books and paperwork away and sat back, lighting his
favorite pipe. He looked at the pictures of his wives that adorned the top
of his desk. Each of them had given him a son,and each of them had died
when the boys had been very small. Three wives, three sons, it still
amazed him how unique they all were. While glancing at the pictures his
thoughts suddenly turned to Adam, something was going on with him lately.
He had been so distracted and absent minded for some time now, and these
were traits that he'd never apply to his eldest son. Adam had always been
the responsible one, the one that could always be counted on. But the last
few weeks he'd been almost in a fog, forgetting things, not paying
attention to business, and was having trouble sleeping too. Ben could hear
him moving around at night when he thought everyone was asleep. He'd been
letting it go because Adam insisted it was nothing more than Spring fever
and it would pass.
Ben rose from his desk deciding to check on the boys, they should've
been back in by now. He went to the door and stepped out into the night
air. He paused to take a deep breath savoring the sweet smell of pine he
loved so much. After a moment he moved on toward the barn. He could hear
his son's voices floating towards him before he reached the barn. He
stopped outside the door to listen to them, he'd learned a long time ago it
was the best way to get information.
" I just don't want to give him a simple name like Blackie, I want him
to have a special name."
That was Hoss, and Ben peeked to see Hoss holding onto the orphaned
foal they'd brought in that morning.
" How about Black Magic?" Joe offered, he was sitting on a bale of hay.
" No that's no good, we had a critter with that name."
They were silent for a while, then Adam said,
"He's probably gonna turn grey when he's older you know?"
" Oh yeah that's right" Hoss said with some disappointment
" Grey Ghost" Joe said trying again.
" How about Scruffy?" Adam said from his position on the saddle stand
" Scruffy..... why?" Hoss inquired
" Doesn't he look scruffy to you?" Adam demanded.
" Oh come on Adam, he's only a baby, he may grow up to be our next
stallion" Joe said reaching out to scratch the foals neck.
" We don't need a new stallion, we have King" Adam said evenly.
Ben knew the reason for that tone, King was Adam's horse, and he was
very proud of the foals he produced each year. He was not about to let
King be replaced.
"Oh we could always get a good price for him at the fall sale" Hoss
said teasing.
" We could get a good price for you too if we sold you by the pound"
Adam answered half kidding.
Joe laughed loudly and Ben decided to move into the conversation.
" Evening Boys", he said as he entered the barn, they all jumped.
"Pa help us think of a name for this here colt" Hoss pleaded.
" Oh Hoss, you've got plenty of time to name him, he's hardly got a
personality yet. Why don't you give him a chance to earn a name, alot can
happen in just a short time."
" Pa's right, besides I'm too tired to think anymore" Adam said,
standing up, ready to go inside.
" Oh come on Adam, you think in your sleep," Joe teased, " I bet you
sleep with your eyes open so you don't miss anything"
Adam hooked his arm around Little Joe's neck and squeezed just a little.
" Alright boys, let's hit the hay, we've got a big day tomorrow" Ben
said slapping his hands together for emphasis. Hoss quickly ushered the
foal into the stall with it's foster mother. Joe was unsuccessfully trying
to dislodge himself, when Adam suddenly let him go, and fell in behind his
father and brother. Joe jumped up and went charging at Adam's back but
didn't anticipate Adam's quick move out of the way and he sprawled to the
ground.
" Nice going Grace" Adam said shaking his head with mock sadness.
Hoss laughed heartily and Ben reached out to help him up, wiping off his back.
"Alright boys that's enough" Ben warned as Joe plotted silent revenge.
Hoss suddenly stopped in front of his father.
" I got it, what about Royal Grace?" Hoss exclaimed.
" Very funny" Joe snarled and stomped into the house.
Hoss turned to Adam expectanly.
" Yeah great what if he grows into a klutz" and he too went inside.
Ben quickly put his arm around his disappointed son.
" I think it's perfect Son, don't pay any attention to them. You're
the only one who knows real horseflesh when you see it"
"Really Pa, you like it?"
" I do indeed and that's the very name I'm putting in the registry book.
He's your colt and you can name him whatever you want."
" Thanks Pa, I reckon he's named for sure. Those two wouldn't know a
good horse if it stepped on em, goodnight Pa"
" Goodnight Son, pleasant dreams" Ben said and watched him enter the
house proudly. He looked up and saw the lantern in Adam's room go on and
took a deep breath. Time to try out his plan, he knew whatever was going
on with Adam had something to do with his trips to town. He was determined
to find out what was troubling him.
He went inside and walked up to Adam's room and knocked lightly on the
door.
" Enter at your own risk" Adam warned. Ben smiled and pushed the door
open.
" I hope that was meant for your brothers" Ben said lightly.
" Sorry Pa, I thought you were Little Joe"
" Oh I see. You know you shouldn't pick on him so much. He's still a
growing boy and look what happened to Hoss."
Adam smiled at that and said, " Pa if we didn't pick on him, he'd
think we didn't like him"'
Ben laughed and leaned on the bureau, it was suddenly silent. Adam
was sitting on the bed with papers spread out in front of him. He looked
up expectantly
" Anything wrong Pa, am I in trouble or something?"
" Oh no not at all. Actually I uh have to go to town tomorrow to see
Mr. Troutman,, find out if he's going to be looking to buy some colts this
year, and I'd like you to go along with me"
Adam suddenly paled and Ben knew he'd been right.
" What d'ya need me for?" he asked
" Oh Adam you know how he's always trying to tell me what they're
going for elsewhere. You're up to date on what's happening in the market,
you can keep him in line for me."
Ben waited watching different emotions float over his son's face. He
was struggling for an excuse, a way out. But Ben knew he didn't want to
refuse his father.
" We gotta move those horses tomorrow" Adam tried.
" Your brothers can handle that. Come on Adam I'm counting on you"
Ben knew he had sealed any way out now.
Adam sighed heavily and nodded, " Okay Pa, whenever you're ready then."
" Good we'll leave right after breakfast"
Adam nodded again, he looked truly defeated and for a moment Ben felt
guilty. But then he remembered the weariness he'd seen more often and
quickly changed his mind. He had to know what the source of the torment
was for Adam's own good. Adam had always been hesitant about asking for
help, even when he obviously needed it.
"Alright then, goodnight Son, pleasant dreams" Ben said and left the
room. As he was walking up the hallway he heard something heavy hit Adam's
bedroom wall, he could guess what that was. He was tempted to go back and
squeeze the truth out of him but as soon as he thought it, he knew it would
never work. With Adam the more you pushed him the more he resisted. He'd
always been like that, even as a small boy. He never liked being
approached by strangers and would hide behind his father and observe
people. If he found them safe though he would respond, but always on his
own terms.
Ben reached his room and was still thinking of Adam as a boy,
remembering what a beautiful child he'd been. Ben had loved holding him on
his lap and reading him stories, and answering his never ending questions.
He remembered sadly the day Adam had come to him with the question he had
dreaded.
" Papa, how come I don't have a mother?"
He had been about three or four at the time, the babyhood fading from
his face. Ben had lifted him on his lap and held him close. Was he ready
to hear this, would he understand?
" Adam your mother died a long time ago, do you know what that means?"
" That my mother went to heaven?" Adam asked
" Yes that's right Adam"
" Why what happened to her?" he asked sounding desperate.
Ben felt his heart tighten, he hated to have to tell him any of this
but he had known this time would come.
" She died about a week after you were born. Your mother was very
delicate I guess"
" Did she get to hold me and stuff, did she like me?"
" Of course she did" Ben turned his son to face him, " She caled you
her precious boy, she gave you your name you know. She loved you very
much, just as I do"
" Then why did she die, why don't she come back to see me?"
Ben held him to his chest and rocked him silently for a minute.
" Adam when someone dies they can't come back"
Adam was quiet and his head felt heavy against his father's chest.
Ben thought he'd fallen asleep but he spoke up again
" So I won't ever see her will I?"
" Yes you will, someday when you go to heaven, she'll be there waiting
for you" Ben promised, his heart was aching for his little boy. Adam
looked up at his father, his face full of concern.
" How will she know me Papa?"
" Oh Adam, every mother knows her own son" he assured him.
Adam layed his head down again, and grew silent once more.
Ben could feel his tiny heart beating and sat wondering what this
information would do to him, how it would change him. Then Adam asked a
question he could barely get out.
" Papa what will happen to me if you die too?"
Ben shuddered, it was a fear he himself had grappled with but he was
not about to let Adam worry about it.
"Adam I'm not going to die for a long, long, long, time"
" You promise?" it was just a whisper.
" I promise with all my heart that I will be your Papa for as long as
you need me."
With that Adam flung his arms around his father's neck and held on
tight. They stayed that way until Adam's arms loosened
and his body grew heavy with sleep.
When Ben returned to the present he could almost feel the familiar
pressure on his chest.
***********************************
CHAPTER 5
Adam was ready and waiting for his father early the next morning. He
hadn't slept much the night before, instead he had lain awake worrying
about running into his tormenter. He could only hope they'd go straight to
the International Hotel and then come home.
On their ride to town Ben tried to carry on idle conversation, even
though Adam wasn't one to participate in it. He was only getting yes and
no answers to his questions so he decided to just enjoy the quiet.
As soon as they got to town, Ben handed Adam an envelope he'd removed
from his saddlebag.
" Take these papers over to the laywers office for me, these are the
ones you forgot to deliver a few weeks ago. Let Hiram know I'm in town and
where we'll be for the day. I'll see if I can talk Mr. Troutman into a
late lunch at Garsons"
" We shouldn't be all day though, we ought'a be home by dinner"
" Well Adam I figured as long as I'm here I can look up some more of
our best customers"
Adam frowned but turned to cross the street to the lawyers office. At
least this way Clif could only single him out and would never have to meet
his father.
Strangley though Adam never saw Clif, he returned to the Hotel
wondering if Clif had tired of the game and left town. He certainly hoped
so because he was growing tired of it.
They finished their business in town after five and Ben was quite
pleased with the days accomplishments. They stepped out onto the porch and
Adam walked immediately to his horse. Ben watched him, he wasn't quite
ready to leave town though.
" Hold on Son, why don't we go over to the saloon and get a drink
before we head home?"
Adam looked toward the saloon and then back at his father.
" Pa I'm kind've full and we've had plenty to drink"
" Oh come on Adam, how often do we get to town like this?"
" Yeah but it's gonna be dark soon, we ought'a get on home"
Ben smiled and said, " Oh nonsense, we got a full moon tonight and
since when are you afraid of the dark"
With that he turned and started walking towards the saloon knowing
Adam would follow. He didnt' right away, instead he stood undecided. He
could just hop on his horse and head on home alone rather than risk running
into Clif. But he decided not to let Clif affect his day and went after
his father.
Adam scanned the tables and bar as soon as they walked through the
swinging doors, there was no sign of Clif. He followed his father to a
table and they sat down.
Once they were seated he glanced around again, his vision temporarily
blocked by one of the saloon girls. Ben smiled and greeted her warmly.
" Well good evening Betty, how about a couple beers for my son and I?"
" Coming right up Mr. Cartwright. Hello Adam, nice to see you" she
said, and winked at him before sauntering off.
" Adam are you blushing?" Ben said dramatically.
" Not exactly Pa, she's not my type"
" Not refined and educated enough for you Son?"
" Now Pa I admit to having a few faults, but one thing I'm not is shallow"
Ben laughed and leaned back in his chair enjoying himself. Betty
returned shortly with their drinks and placed them on the table. Ben payed
including a generous tip. She thanked him with a big smile and turning to
Adam said," Adam by the way Clif was looking for you earlier. He was here
around lunchtime, but I'm sure he's back out at the ranch by now."
This time Adam's face really turned red and his father saw it. He was
stuck now, but also curious.
" What ranch?" he asked her.
" Oh silly didn't you know, he's been working at the Lazy K for weeks"
Adam was about to ask her more but she was called to the bar. He didn't
have to look up to know what was coming.
" Who's Clif, that name doesn't sound familiar?"
Adam looked around the room, trying to focus on anything else before
answering.
" Oh he's just someone I knew in Boston, he's been in town for awhile
looking for work, guess he found it."
" Why didn't you offer him a job at the Ponderosa, we could've used him
a few weeks ago?"
Adam's face colored again as he studied his drink
" Pa we weren't exactly close friends, he probably wouldn't have
accepted it."
Ben knew he was on to something simply because Adam was having a
difficult time looking at him. That had always been a sure sign that he
was hiding something. Ben wanted to get more information from him but an
old friend came over to the table and joined them. Nearly an hour passed
when Ben announced,
" Well we better get on home, the boys are probably waiting on us"
Adam looked greatly relieved, and stood without hestitation.
"Aren't you going to finish your drink?" Ben asked him.
" No I don't want it, I'll wait for you outside."
He walked out to where the horse were tied and looked up and down the
streets. Now he knew Clif was staying, but why would he hang around except
to carry out some kind of cause. Did he want revenge, was he dangerous?
Or was he just a man looking for a place to settle down. But why here in
this territory? Why didn't he just go home and re-establish himself with
his family, maybe things were different there now?
Ben broke into his thoughts as he approached the horses. He stood on
the deck and looked around.
" What a beautiful day we had, I could use some more of those"
Me too Adam thought sarcastically, but he didn't say anything. They
mounted up and rode out of town. Ben had been right about the full moon,
they could clearly see the path back to the ranch.
Ben was thinking about how to bring up the subject of Adam's friend but
decided to let it go for awhile. They rode along in silence letting the
horses pick their own trail home. Adam was thinking about when he and his
brothers were younger and how they'd tie the reins in a knot and lay back
on the horses and let them find the way home. He suddenly smiled
remembering a day when Little Joe fell asleep on his horse and had fallen
to the ground.
" I like riding at night" he heard his father say, " the darkness makes
you feel isolated from everything. Is that why you used to go off alone at
night when you were younger?"
Adam looked at his father and nodded, " I still do sometimes when
something is bothering me"
" Yeah I know, I've noticed you missing a few times in the last couple
of weeks"
Adam smiled realizing his father had snared him again. It was going to
come out now but in a way he was relieved. He had always been able to tell
his father his troubles. There wasn't anyone else in his life he trusted
more. Yet for some reason it was hard to open up.
" So what's been troubling you lately Son?" Ben asked
When Adam didn't answer right away, he pursued it further
" Does this Clif fella have something to do with it?"
Adam simply nodded, he reached down to pull strands of his horses mane
out from under the saddle blanket before speaking.
" Clif was cheating on exams at school and I reported it to the Dean.
He was expelled from school and says it ruined his life and I'm
responsible. He hounds me everytime he sees me, sometimes he actually
makes threats. I don't know if he's serious or even anything to worry
about, I just keep hoping he'll get tired of it all and leave town. That's
why I was surprised wehn Betty said he was working at the Kelly ranch. I
don't get it Pa, he tried to give me the impression that he was a dangerous
drifter and yet he's been hanging around this area for almost two months,
what does he really want?"
Ben shook his head, " That I don't know Son, you'd have to ask him"
" I don't even want to talk to him anymore, I just want him to leave"
The horses kept picking up their pace so they knew they were close to
home. They held them back until they could see the barn come into view and
then they let them go a little.
They tended the horses quickly and without talking. Ben turned when he
saw a shadow in the doorway, it was Joe.
" Where've you guys been, I was getting worried?"
Ben saw he and Adam exchange a glance and realized that Adam must have
already told Joe about his problem with Clif, that was odd.
" We were just taking care of business Joseph, no need to worry.
Where's your brother Hoss?"
" He went to bed a little while ago, it's almost ten you know?"
" Is it? What time were we supposed to be back?" Ben asked.
Joe stared at him, took the hint and turned to go back inside.
" He was really worried about us" Adam stated with a smile
" Yes he was, he'll make a good parent someday"
Ben said smiling too with a wink. He blew out the lantern and put an
arm around Adam as they walked inside.
Inside the door they removed their hats, coats, and gunbelts. Joe was
watching them from the sofa, and Ben had a feeling he was waiting to talk
to Adam. Adam was thinking the same thing so Ben decided to leave them
alone for a few minutes.
" Well I'm gonna see if there's any coffee left" he announced and went
into the kitchen. Adam went to sit on the sofa and looked at his brother.
" Well what happened, did Clif start something?" Joe asked
" No nothing happened, Clif wasn't even in town. But guess what?"
Seeing Joe was waiting he went on , " He has a job at the Lazy K, been
working there for some time"
" Doing what? He sure didn't look like a cattleman"
" I don't know, but I intend to find out"
Joe sat back and rested his head, taking a deep breath.
" Well at least you didn't have to explain his problem to Pa"
" Well actually I did tell Pa about it, most of it"
Joe picked his head up, started to say something, then changed his
mind. He put his head against the back of the sofa and closed his eyes.
For some reason he felt hurt that Adam had told Ben, he liked being the
only one Adam had shared the problem with. He felt disappointed and didn't
even know why.
A few minutes later Ben came from the kitchen carrying a cup of coffee
and sat down on the opposite side of Adam as he moved over.
" It's still hot if you want some?" Ben said
Adam shook his head and Ben looked around him and saw that Joe was asleep.
He smiled and then turned back to his eldest.
" There's something I wanted to ask you about your friend"
Adam looked at him expectantly
" Well you said Clif wanted you to take responsibility for waht
happened. How do you feel about that?"
Adam looked confused by the question, he didn't know how to answer that.
" What I mean is, do you feel responsible for him?"
Adam was going to say no right away, but couldn't. He stood up and
walked to the fireplace to watch the flames.
" You know Pa if you'd asked me that then, I would've said no, now I'm
not sure. I mean don't I have some of the responsibility for the direction
his life has taken?" Adam said turning to face his father halfway through
the sentence.
When their eyes met Ben said softly but seriously,
" You're the only one who can answer that Son"
Adam dropped his head and turned back to the fire. Seeing this
reaction Ben rose and stood behind him. He put his hands on Adam's
shoulders and massaged them lightly.
" Adam I think as long as you have any doubt at all, your Mr. Donovan
will hang around. Maybe he senses your doubt and that's why he continues
to antagonize you. You can't second guess yourself, once you know in your
heart who the blame lies with, you can confront him and walk away from it."
Adam nodded, straightened up, and faced his father again.
" Of course you're right, and I'll do that. I'm sorry I didn't tell
you about it sooner"
" Well I'm glad you did, looked like a heavy load" Ben said and Adam
smiled slightly. Ben wanted to hug him but didn't. As usual he resisted
the impulse for fear of embarassing him. Instead he put a hand on his
shoulder, " Why don't you go on to bed now, and try to get some sleep tonight"
" Yeah I will, thanks Pa. Goodnight" and he walked up the stairs, his
steps heavy.
Ben turned to his youngest, who was breathing heavier now. He leaned
down to take hold of his shoulder and shook lightly. His head rolled a
little.
" Joseph, come on wake up Son"
He slowly opened his eyes looking around with confusion.
" Geez, I must've fallen asleep, what time is it?"
" Past your bedtime, come on" Ben said pulling him to his feet. He
followed him wearily up the stairs, mornings came too early he thought.
*****************************
CHAPTER 6
Ben sat atop the fence watching his sons herd a group of
colts into the holding pen. He sat with a prespective buyer and
his foreman as the colts filed in.
The colts milled around, one would occasionally flatten his
ears and kick out or nip the others. But for the most part they
stayed huddled in a corner watching the humans on horseback.
" How many you got this year Ben?" Walt Troutman asked.
" Sixty three total Walt, we got about half here and we'll
bring the rest down tomorrow"
Walt turned back to the herd studying them closely. He was
not a new customer to the Ponderosa, but he was a steady one.
" I can buy maybe twenty five this year, maybe more next.
You say these have been broke?"
" They've been green broke, you want the boys to put one
through it's paces?"
Walt looked thoughtful a moment than shook his head. He
motioned the boys to get the colts moving again. Walt put on a
rodeo every year and then sold the stock afterward to out of town
buyers, he almost always made a good profit.
" You get the rest down and I can have my pick right?"
" Same as always Walt, you want them?"
Walt turned to Ben with his hand out, " You got a deal Mr.
Cartwright, I'll be back in three days, fifty dollars a head,
cash"
Ben took his hand and they shook on it to secure the deal.
Then Walt hopped down from the fence walked to his horse and rode
off with his foreman.
Ben was soon joined by his sons, who looked at him
expectantly. Adam spoke for all of them, " Well?"
Ben smiled with pleasure, " He'll take twenty five, he'll be
back on Monday to pick em out"
" Wow he buys more of them every year, maybe next year he'll
buy the whole passle of em" Hoss declared.
" Mr Bishop wants ten, fifteen for Mr. Thurman, that's fifty
bought already. If we have to we can sell the rest at the fall
auction" Adam offered thoughtfully.
" Well I want to talk to Andy McKaren too, he may want to
buy a handfull of them too." Ben added.
" This has to be the best year we've ever had with our
stock" Joe exclaimed
" Well let's hope we do just as well with our other
ventures" Ben said turning to Adam " Which reminds me, let's get
to that tree marking Adam"
Ben climbed down and untying his horse said, " Hoss you and
Joe tend these horses, then go bring the bull down"
Joe groaned, how he hated that ornery thing, and he just got
meaner every year. He couldn't wait for the first excuse to get
off the ranch. Hoss studious as ever only said, " Yes sir Pa,
you fellas gonna be back for supper?"
Adam mounted his horse and rode up beside his father as Ben
said, " We'll do our best Hoss, you be sure and save us some"
Hoss blushed and smiled and waved them on, " Aw get out'a her
Pa"
They all laughed and Ben and Adam rode off. Joe and Hoss went
straight to work opening gates to give the colts full access to
the pen and more room to move around. Then Hoss moved the
buckboard alongside the fence and started throwing some hay over.
Joe joined him and they were soon engrossed in their work. As
they were working a rider came galloping up in the distance.
Both of them stopped to watch the dust cloud approach to try and
see who it was. It was Frank, the telegrapher, and schoolday
friend of Joe's. Joe was absolutely thrilled to see anyone
outside of the ranch.
" Hey Frank, it's great to see you. What'd you do find us a
new rig?" Referring to a pasttime he and Frank had enjoyed for
some time. They often would find old rigs, fix them up like new
and then resell them.
" Oh no, this is much better. How would you like to go to a
dance tomorrow night?"
Joe jumped down from the wagon, " A dance, where?" he asked
his face lit up with excitement.
" In Virginia City, the bankers daughter is home from school
and Mr. Weems is celebrating. You remember Jenny don't you?"
" Oh boy do I" Joe said catching Franks wink. " I'm sure I can
go but I gotta check with Pa tonight. What time are they gonna
start this shindig?"
" Seven o'clock, come on Joe you gotta be there"
" I know, look I'll be there. I just gotta let Pa know I'm
going. You just wait for me and make sure she saves me a dance"
Frank slapped Joe on the arm, smiling broadly
" Great you got it, I'll see you there then"
Frank practically ran back to his horse, hopped on and turned
to wave. Joe smiled back at him and returned the wave, " See you
tomorrow night" he hollered after him. He knew his father would
let him go and he couldn't wait. He was tired of the hot
relentles work and dawn to dusk schedule they'd been on for
weeks. He walked back to Hoss feeling just a little less tired.
He told Hoss about the dance and asked him to go along.
" No thanks little brother, I'm saving myself for the end of
the summer hoe down, the daddy of them all. That's the best one
and everyone is there. Besides by tomorrow I'll be too tired for
any dancing"
" Oh well" Joe said in mock sadness " I'll miss you. It must
be rough getting old"
Hoss answered that with a forkfull of hay on his head. In no
time they were both covered and laughing like schoolboys. The
horseplay was a great stress breaker for the long days they put
in.
They were not alone, nearly every man in the territory was
putting in the same kind of work day. Every man including
Clifton Donovan, who strangely was enjoying every minute of it.
He was not raised to do this kind of work, it was a behind the
desk kind of future his family had been planning for him. But
when young Dave Kelly offered him a job, Clif saw it as a chance
to stay in town a little longer. So he was quite surprised to
find himself comfortable with the work and the people. His
purpose for taking the job had been to stay around and rile Adam
some more, but there had been little time for that or anything
else.
He'd also been listening to the people around him and found
that most of them had great respect for the Cartwright family.
Some even had tales of being carried through rough times by them.
Because of this Clif was beginning to have a change of heart. He
felt as though he belonged on the Kelly ranch and was making new
friends. For the first time in a long time he was thinking about
a future in one place, perhaps he could settle here. He was
making honest money and gaining respect from the people around
him. He was tired of drifting around the country, he wanted a
place of his own. Mr. Kelly had already promised him six head of
cattle when the job was done, he would have his stake. Just the
thought of it filled him with pride and excitement, he wondered
vaguely what his family would think of him now. He had thought
many times of going home, but never got closer than a hotel room.
Through old friends and family acquaintances he was able to get
information about them. It was how he learned of his father's
death and had contemplated seeing his mother, but never did.
That wasn't his home anymore.
He had stood alone on that last trip looking down at his
father's grave. What was there to say? His father had banished
him from the family home with a look Clif would never forget. He
felt empty as he knelt there on the ground and simply whispered,
" I'm sorry Father" He didn't know what else to say. He longed
to see his mother but couldn't bear to face her and so he moved
on growing more angry and bitter than before. And he had
silently vowed to make the man he felt was responsible pay for
this pain he felt.
But now in this new life, he could perhaps forget the
bitterness and move on. Maybe even marry someday and have his
own family. The mere thought made him feel warm and content,
this was his home now and he was going to stay.
The sound of riders approaching broke into his thoughts and he
recognized Dave Kelly and some of the hands. They rode up behind
him and then came up alongside him.
" Well Foreman, you gonna get these strays in today or what?"
Dave asked with authority.
" I intend to eventually, are the pens ready?"
" Ready and waiting but that ain't all we got waiting"
Clif turned to examine the beaming faces around him, and to
one of them said, " What's he babbling about Buck?"
" Well Foreman" Buck began but was swiftly rewarded with a
punch on the arm. Clif had made the mistake of commenting that
he would like to be foreman someday. Now his new friends took
great joy in teasing him about it. Although they were smart
enough not to mention it in front of the real foreman. Buck
laughed good naturedly and finished, " It seems tomorrow night
we'll be rewarded for our hard work"
" Well it ain't the end of the month so we ain't getting paid,
so what's the big surprise?" Clif said impatiently. He looked
from one to the other and they all sat with those silly smiles on
their faces. Unable to stand it any longer he grabbed Dave's arm.
" Come on already, what is it?"
" Okay okay, it's a dance tomorrow night in Virgina City. At
the town hall at seven o'clock. Mr. Weems is welcoming his
daughter home. She left here a little girl some four years ago,
but you know how they can change in just a short time.
Personally I can't wait to see her" Dave stated
Clif adopted the look of his friends. What a time they would
have, a chance to let loose and have fun.
" Well what are we waiting for , let's get these dogies
corraled" he shouted happily.
He let out a whoop and surged forward, the others all
following close behind.
*********************************
CHAPTER 7
Ben not only gave Little Joe the okay to go to the dance, he
informed him that he was coming along. He added that he wouldn't
stay long, just long enough to say hello to Jennifer and her
father and maybe visit with friends a little. That was fine with
Joe as long as he was free to enjoy himself.
After another long day, Joe's every muscle ached and he
worried that he wouldn't have the energy to enjoy himself. But
later, a long hot bath did the trick, and he was raring to go.
He practically ran down the same stairs he'd dragged himself up
earlier.
Hoss was at the table helping himself to yet another of Hop
Sing's tarts. Hop Sing's desserts were family favorites, and the
smell of his cooking was something that made coming home all the
more pleasureable.
Adam stood by the fireplace poking at the wood, apparently
lost in thought. Joe noticed he was still in his work clothes,
he frowned knowing what that meant, he wasn't going either. He
had felt so good and happy, he wanted to share it with everyone.
"Don't tell me you're not going either, are you staying here
with Grandpa over there?" Joe said indicating Hoss who looked up
with his mouth full. Adam turned to face his youngest brother.
" Yes I'm staying home, I'm too tired to be any good tonight"
Joe suddenly grabbed him around the waist and danced him
around saying, " Come on Adam, come with us and teach me how to
charm the ladies. Then I could sweep Jenny Weems off her feet,
she'll marry me and we'll name the first one after you"
Adam playfully pushed him away,mussing up his hair.
" You ain't gonna get anywhere if you step on her foot like
that, ya klutz"
Joe took up a mock fighting stance and jabbed at Adam's chest
dancing all around him. Hoss was laughing loudly as Adam joined
in the pretend fight. Joe's excitement was contagious and it
couldn't help but wear off. They were abrubtly interrupted by
their father's booming voice at the top of the stairs,
" What in thunder is going on here?" he demanded
At first glance he thought the fight was real, but quickly
realized his mistake by the expression on their faces. Hoss
merely confirmed it for him.
" Aw Pa, they weren't hurting anything, they was just funning"
Ben straightened his tie and tried to look grim.
" We'll have none of that in the house, Adam I'm surprised at
you"
Adam put his arm around Joe's shoudler and leaned a little too
hard and said, " He started it"
Joe looked at Ben with such innocence he had to laugh, then
gaining his composure said, " Well we better get going Joseph"
With that Joe gave Adam one final poke in the stomach and
leaped for his coat. He was dancing around so much Ben shook his
head. He may have to keep him out of trouble tonight. He turned
to the other two.
" Boys I'll be back in a couple hours, see to the fire if you
go to bed before that. Joseph will be back by midnight"
Joe frowned but recovered quickly and smiling sweetly at his
brothers bolted out the door.
" Comb your hair " Adam hollered after him, shaking his head
with a smile.
" Have a good time" he added to Ben with just a hint of
warning.
" Yeah " Ben answered with a sigh. " I hope I'm not going to
be sorry" and he walked out the door nearly slamming it.
Adam and Hoss looked at each other and laughed knowingly.
The town hall was full of people by 6:30 and Jenny Weems was
living a dream. She was home with all her old friends and a
party to celebrate, what more could a girl ask for. There were
so many faces, so much happiness and excitement she thought she
would burst. She watched as yet another familiar face came
towards her, dragging another young man behind him.
" David Kelly how are you? Oh look at you all grown and
proper" David took her arm and kissed her cheek, a warm smile on
his face.
" I'm not the only one whose grown Jenny, I hardly recognized
you" He suddenly turned to his companion. " Oh Jen, this is Clif
Donovan, best hand we ever hired and a good friend
Clif reached out to take her extended hand, he felt the color
rush to his face. He was at a loss, he had not been in the
company of such a lady in a long time.
" Miss Weems it's a pleasure to meet you" he said quietly
She was quite surprised by his shyness, and she saw something
in his eyes too that intriqued her. They were so blue she felt
she could drown in them. She felt something pass between them
that she'd never felt before. Something had clicked for him too
as soon as he took her hand. He realized with a start that he
was still holding it.
" Well I'm gonna get me some punch" Dave suddenly announced.
Clif watched him go feeling a sudden rise of panic.
Jenny offered Clif a seat beside her and he gratefully took
it. He watched her gracefully sit and smooth her skirts, and
then she smiled at him and said, " Where are you from Clif?"
" Massachusettes, near Boston" he answered
" Oh I love Boston, it's so beautiful" she gushed " Why did
you ever leave?"
" Oh I don't know" Clif cleared his throat growing
uncomfortable with the direction the conversation was going " I
guess I was looking for a new life"
" Well I have to say, the west is quite a contrast. I admit I
loved going to school and meeting all kinds of new people. But
this is my home, wild and untamed"
Clif looked into her face, for some reason her statement
made him feel wonderful. When she met his eyes it was if
everyone in the room disappeared. He'd never believed in love at
first sight but he'd never felt like this before either. He
vaguely wondered if she was feeling the same thing.
They stayed that way for a long time, talking like old
friends. Though now and then she would stand to greet her guests
she always came back to him and gave him her full attention. He
never felt so special, and he knew he was in love. He wanted to
tell her how he was feeling when suddenly she leaped to her feet.
Her eyes danced with delight, she was practically dancing with
excitement. Clif looked in the direction of her attraction
" Little Joe Cartwright, look at you" she cried as he came
and hugged her lightly.
" Oh Jenny, you are more beautiful then ever" Joe said
He held her at arms length, beaming at her with affection.
Ben came up behind him and also hugged her.
" Oh Mr. Cartwright it's so wonderful to see you"
" You look absolutely radiant Jennifer, how are you?" Ben
said warmly.
" I'm wonderful" she declared. Remembering her companion she
turned her attention to him. " Do you fellas know Clif Donovan?"
They turned together to look at him, Joe forced a smile. Ben
was rather surprised to see him.
" We've met before, how are you Mr. Donovan?" Joe said
Clif nodded at Joe, hiding his fury. He was fuming at
Jenny's reaction to his arrival. All the old resentments began
to build again. Leave it to a Cartwright to spoil everything, he
thought. Ben extended his hand to him
" I've heard a lot about you Clif, nice to finally meet you"
Clif shook his hand, not sure what the comment meant. He
looked into Ben's eyes and nearly faltered when he realized they
were Adam's eyes. He mumbled an excuse and departed the group,
unable to bear anymore.
He walked over to the punch bowl and leaned against the wall
watching them from a distance. He watched how Jenny was giving
Joe the same attention she'd given him. He felt foolish for
having thought he'd found something special in her. The more he
watched, the angrier he got. The flame in his heart quickly grew
to a fire. These Cartwrights are too smug and sure of themselves
he thought, they need to come down a notch or two. He still owed
Adam a lesson in life, and he was going to make sure he learned
it.
Dave Kelly joined him a few minutes later. He held a flask
out to him and followed Clif's angry stare.
" Want a drink?" he offered
Clif took it without taking his eyes off Joe and Jenny.
" So what happened with Jenny" Dave asked.
Clif glared at him, shifting his anger, " What the hell is
that supposed to mean?" he demanded.
Dave held his hands up defensively, " Hey take it easy, I was
just asking"
Clif dropped his head, " Sorry I guess it's been a long day"
he apologized. He held the flask back out to Dave
" Hey keep it, apparently you need it more than me" and he
walked off.
Clif watched him leave and then turned his attention back to
Jenny. Joe and his father were gone,and she was visiting with
new guests. He thought about rejoining her but couldn't bring
himself to do it. Instead he turned away and went looking for
Dave.
Joe in the meantime had joined his friend Frank and some
others. Mike Walsh was telling them about an auction the next
day in Genoa. He told them there was an old coach there they may
be interested in.
" I guess it's just been gathering dust for some time, but I
bet you two could fix it up nice in no time. From what I saw it
just needs shocks and a new lamp on one side, nothing major"
Joe and Frank looked at each other smiling.
" What time does the auction start?" Frank asked
Mike checked his pockets and produced a piece of paper and
handed it to Frank. Joe leaned over and read over Frank's
shoulder.
" Two o'clock, if we leave early in the morning we can get
there in time " Joe said, then added, " I wanna go let Pa know
I'm going before he leaves" and he ran off to find his father.
A couple hours later Clif was waiting for Dave in the cloak
room. The alcohol he'd been consuming all night didn't help his
mood any, it only intensified his anger. He'd been hoping that
Adam would show up but he never did. Then he thought about
confronting his brother, but he was never alone so that didn't
pan out either.
He did manage to dance with Jenny a few times, and was even
more taken with her. He had so much to say to her but said
little when he had the chance. He was baffled by the effect she
had on him but wasn't sure he even cared.
Growing impatient with waiting he glanced around the room
when something caught his eye. It was a simple jacket left
hanging there, a very familiar jacket. It took him only a moment
to remember who he'd seen wearing the green jacket earlier that
evening, Joe Cartwright. He slowly walked over and lifted the
jacket from the peg. His mind began working up a plan, this was
exactly the thing he needed to teach Adam a lesson on loss.
Not much later a chicken was sacrificed to put his plan into
action. He sent Dave back to the ranch without him and got
himself a room in town for the night. Tomorrow was Sunday so he
didn't have to work anyway, it would be perfect. The only thing
he hadn't figured out was how he would get Adam to come into
town. He was thinking about this as he gazed out the window of
his room watching the people in the street.
He looked up and saw the livery stable in the distance, that
was it. He would have Adam meet him there, it would be closed
tomorrow. And he would get one of the town boys to deliver a
message to get Adam to come. And there he would show him the
jacket, he smiled at the thought. He turned to look at it
hanging off a chair, now soaked with chicken blood. He couldn't
wait to see the look on Adam's face, he would think Clif had
killed Joe and he would feel his world crumble. He wondered how
long he should wait to tell him the truth, how long should he let
him suffer. No amount of time would make him feel they were even
up, but just to see that look of devastation on Adam's face would
be some justification.
He lay back on the bed too excited and too worked up to
sleep. He'd waited a long time for a chance like this and he was
going to enjoy it. He took a long drink from the whiskey bottle
he'd purchased earlier that evening. Yes sir tomorrow would be a
day worth waiting for .
*******************************
CHAPTER 8
When Ben woke Sunday morning it wasn't quite light yet. He
wanted to rise early though to see Joseph and his young friend
off to Genoa. He was also planning on going to Virgina City to
attend church services and to have breakfast with an old friend.
He quickly dressed and shaved in the dim lantern light and
went downstairs. The fire was roaring in the fireplace so he
knew Joe was probably up already. Sure enough Joe and Frank were
in the kitchen having coffee.
" Morning boys" Ben said, " What're you doing in here?"
" Morning Pa" Joe replied " We thought we'd stay in here so
we didn't wake anyone up"
" Well that was very thoughtful of you boys. What time did
you get in last night?" Ben asked as he poured himself a cup.
" A little after eleven. You know Hoss was still up, he
said he was reading but I know better than that" Joe said with
annoyance.
Ben smiled with a little empathy. It must be hard to be the
youngest he thought. All the time trying to convince yourself
your grown, and yet everyone around you treats you like a child.
" Wow it's almost six, we better get going Frank" Joe
exclaimed.
" Right, hey thanks for letting me stay overnight Mr.
Cartwright" Frank said.
" Anytime Frank " Ben said. He put his cup down preparing
to walk them to the door. He watched them strap on their guns
and felt a sudden stab of anxiety. He always felt it when one of
his boys went off like this.
" Be careful now" Ben called after them, then added, " Have
a good time"
Suddenly Joe poked his head back in the door
" Hey Pa would you do me favor if you go to town today?
Would you stop at the town hall and get my jacket? I left it
there last night, thanks"
Ben nodded but Joe was already gone by the time he did.
Then he sighed deeply and returned to the kitchen. Finishing his
coffee he put all three cups in the sink. Hop Sing was away for
the weekend and he briefly thought about making another pot for
Hoss and Adam. But remembering they usually slept in a little on
Sunday he changed his mind. He thought about leaving them a note
about his whereabouts but decided to do it once he was ready to
leave, just in case one of them got up before then.
Unfortunately he forgot to write the note and didn't think
of it until he was halfway to town. Oh well, there really wasn't
anything for them to worry about.
Adam woke sometime after seven. He yawned and stretched,
then got up to look out the window. He'd been up late reading in
his room as usual and was still tired. He'd heard his father
come home around ten, but must've fallen asleep before he came
upstairs, there was no telling when Joe got home.
He scratched his face, feeling the stubble and hating the
idea of shaving. Sometimes he considered letting his beard grow
out, but the one time he'd let it go, he ended up looking like
something off a wanted poster.
He felt better, more alert, after a shave and headed
downstairs to get some breakfast. He could hear Hoss snoring
through the closed door of his bedroom as he passed by, and he
smiled. He stopped suddenly outside Joe's room when he found the
door open. Joe had to be dragged from his bed most mornings, he
couldn't possibly be up already. Especially considering the fact
he'd been out late the night before. Adam walked in his room
surprised to find the bed empty. Maybe his father had gotten him
up for some reason but he doubted it, he'd just have to ask his
father himself.
Adam was even more surprised to find Ben missing as well. He
checked the table and his father's desk for a note, there wasn't
any. This was puzzling and Adam hated puzzles, where were they?
He now wished he'd stayed up until they both got home. But
thinking again he realized Ben would have alerted them last night
if there'd been any trouble. Hoss might've been up when they got
home and he thought about waking him but didn't really want to.
This was the only day they ever got any extra sleep. He decided
a cup of coffee might clear his head a little and walked into the
kitchen.
Once there he found the empty pot of coffee, and going to the
pump to fill it, he found three empty cups in the sink. Now he
was more confused, he knew Hoss was sleeping, and Hop Sing
wouldn't be back until that evening, why was there three?
Growing irritated he filled the pot quickly and decided he'd
ride into town and maybe find them there. He made himself a
quick bite to eat while waiting for his coffee, and finishing
went quickly to the barn. As he walked out the door he took note
that both his father and brother's gunbelts were missing.
He was saddling his chestnut when he heard someone galloping
up to the house. He rushed outside hoping it was his father but
instead found Sammy Peterson, a local boy from town.
" Hi Sammy, what the heck are you doing out here so early?"
The boy dismounted, somewhat out of breath from the ride in.
" Adam some fella paid me a whole dollar to give you this
here note, he said it was real important"
Adam frowned, expecting the worst and took the note from the
boy.
" Who gave it to you?" he asked thoughtfully.
" I don't know his name but I seen him around before. He's a
yellow haired fella works on one of the ranchs hereabouts"
I guess I know who that is, Adam thought as he unfolded the
note and read,
Adam
Meet me at the livery stable right away, a matter of life and
death.
Clifton Donovan
He folded the note back up and stuffed it in his pocket.
Looking at Sammy he dug in his pocket and pulled out a dollar,
and flipped it to him.
" Thanks Sammy, listen now you go on inside and wake Hoss up.
Tell him to feed you a decent breakfast and tell him I went in to
town okay?"
" Wow thanks Adam, you bet I will" and he proudly sauntered
off.
Adam watched him go then quickly went for his horse. Once
outside he rechecked the cinch and then climbed on. His horse
was already trotting off, and once he was seated he pressed him
into an easy canter. He knew he had to pace him so he wouldn't
get him too hot by the time they reached town. He didn't want to
waste time having to cool him off. And yet he felt as though he
couldn't get there fast enough. His mind was going a mile a
minute, trying to come up with any reasonable explanation for the
day's already strange events. He was growing more and more
irritated the closer he got to town.
Once he reached town he was surprised to find his father's
horse tied outside the International Hotel. He abrubtly pulled
his horse to a stop unsure of what to do next. He glanced around
looking for Joe's paint mare but didn't see her anywhere. He
thought about seeking out his father but at the moment was more
curious about what Clif was up to.
When he reached the livery stable it looked deserted and it
took him a moment to remember it was closed for the day. He tied
his horse to the fence and hestitated at the door of the barn.
He pushed on it expecting it to be locked, it slowly swung open.
Adam cautiously stepped inside, he was struck by the strong smell
of liquor. He waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness and
soon spotted Cliff near the loft ladder.
" Morning Adam, I'm glad you got my message"
Adam looked around the barn, he had an uneasy feeling in his
stomach, something was very wrong. He had the feeling that he
should just turn around and leave, but he wanted the whole game
to end here and now.
" Yeah I got it, what's this all about?"
" Oh I had something I wanted to show you" he said reaching
down to pull a hunting knife from his belt, twisting it around so
Adam could see the glint of the blade.
" Yeah that's real impressive Clif, look you're drunk and on
top of that you're trespassing. What d'ya want with me, what's
with the life and death message?"
" Oh that, well Adam I'm afraid you're a little late, I'm
afraid it's death" As he spoke he bent to pull the jacket from
behind the bales of hay. He held it up making sure Adam saw the
blood and getting the reaction he wanted, dropped it.
Adam broke out in a cold sweat, he felt the air go out of him.
Every emotion hit him at once like a punch in the gut. He
couldn't focus and could feel the blood draining from his face
and then to his dismay he could hear Clif laughing.
Clif saw it all flashing across Adam's face and felt himself
rewarded. In his drunken state he found Adam's reaction pleasing
and funny. He started to laugh loudly and couldn't seem to help
himself. Out of nowhere Adam was on him. He istinctively
brought his hands up, aware Adam was choking him. He was
starting to struggle for breath when he realized Adam was losing
his grip and was falling back. The fury in Adam's eyes changed
to something else and he put his hands to his stomach. Clif was
confused as he watched Adam falling to his knees, his hands
turning red. Clif suddenly remembered the knife and seeing the
blood dropped it in horror.
'Oh my God' he thought, 'No this is all wrong,I was just
supposed to scare him. Not this, it happened so fast'
He didn't know what to do, his legs started shaking and his
run reflex was twitching like crazy but he couldn't move. Adam
was now sitting against the wall. Clif grabbed the jacket and
knelt by him, he moved Adam's bloodsoaked hands out of the way
and pressed the jacket in their place.
" Adam here hold this there..... Oh God. Adam listen to me, I
didn't mean it I was just trying to scare you, I didn't mean it"
Adam was losing consciousness, struggling to stay awake.
Clif's voice was far away now. He was cold and more afraid then
he'd ever been in his life. He was dying and he knew it, he
needed his father desperately, he didn't want to die alone like
this. He grabbed Clif's shirt gasping,
" Clif....... please, my father. Go get my father."
" Adam please hold that there. I'm gonna get the doc"
Adam had a tenacious grip on his shirt. Exasperated Clif
started hollering for help as he watched Adam sliding down the
rest of the way.
Adam was adrift at sea now and it was swirling, sucking him
down. He felt nauseos and tried to focus on something familiar.
He wanted his father and thought he was calling him but couldn't
be sure. He thought it was strange that he wasn't there, where
was he? And Adam was not sure where he himself was or where he
was going, and he was afraid.
He felt like a small boy again, lost and unable to find his
way back. Why didn't his father come, he kept trying to call him
but wasn't sure if he was even making any sound.
Clif was still hollering for help as Adam whispered for his
father over and over. Clif was desperate, he couldn't leave Adam
now or he would bleed to death for sure. His only hope was that
someone would hear him.
Someone finally did as three men came bursting through the
door. They stared in horror at the scene before them.
" What happened in here, is that Adam Cartwright?"
" Yes get the Doc, quick, hurry!" Cliff yelled at them.
" I know where he is, I'll get him" one of them said and he
rushed out the door.
Adam groaned and whispered his father's name again.
" Ben's over at the International, I'll go find him" one of
the others said and he too rushed away.
'Hurry for God's sake' Clif thought watching Adam slip away.
Adam was shivering violently now, he was so alone and afraid. It
was dark and nothing made any sense to him. He was surrounded by
strange voices and sounds, and the ringing noise in his ears was
getting louder and louder.
Ben was just finishing his coffee when old Charlie came
rushing in the door. He rushed to Ben's table shouting,
" Ben the livery stable, it's Adam, he's hurt real bad. You
gotta get over there fast, he's dying"
Ben felt his heart drop, he passed Charlie at the door and yet
felt as if he were moving in slow motion. This had to be a
mistake, he knew where his sons were and Adam was at home. He as
not prepared for what he saw when he rushed into the stable. He
stared at Clif still holding the jacket against the wound,
everything looked red.
" My God, what happened" Ben cried. Clif looked up at him a
pleading in his eyes.
" Mr. Cartwright, I'm so sorry, it was an accident. I stole
the jacket last night, I just wanted to scare him. He jumped me
it happened too fast, it was an accident, I'm sorry" Ben looked
at him in disbelief, what was he babbling about. Why was he here
with Adam and how did they get here. Then he heard Adam whisper
for him and he dropped to his knees in the hay.
" It's gonna be alright Son, Papa's here" he said, then pulled
him into his arms, until Adam's back was resting against his
chest. He felt the violent shivering and wanted to cry out loud.
He looked at Clif still kneeling beside Adam holding the now
unrecognizable jacket against the wound. Ben could feel the panic
rising in his throat.
" Get me a blanket or something. Did anyone go after Doc
Martin?" Ben asked
" Yes Sir Ben, Lem did. We thought it best not to move him"
the man said as he handed Ben a blanket off one of the stalls.
Adam stirred, he heard his father's voice from far away and
called again. Ben quickly wrapped the blanket and his arms
around him, then quietly spoke in his son's ear.
" Adam, I'm right here, it's okay. You're gonna be alright,
everything's okay, I'm here"
Adam became aware of the voice close to him, he was pulled
from the swirling waters to safety. He then became aware of his
father's arms around him and struggled for consciousness. He had
to tell his father something but couldn't remember what. It
didn't matter though he wasn't alone anymore, he was safe.
" Pa, I think I'm dying.............. I'm sorry"
Ben held him tighter, tears falling freely. He couldn't speak
he had felt like this before, too many times. He knew he could
not survive it again, words failed him, he kissed his son's head.
He struggled for hope and faith, he would not give him up,
" No Son, you're not dying, you're gonna be just fine. I'm
here, you just sleep now, I'm not going to leave you, I'll be
right here"
With that Adam closed his eyes. He was safe and warm now, no
longer afraid. Death was not so frightening either and he let
the darkness take over.
************************
Continued in Part 2

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