*These characters are not mine and
such…they are the property of David Dortort etc.…Well, except Carrie, she’s
mine, but the rest are the property of David Dortort*
*Also, feedback is greatly appreciated. Hope you like it!*
Good Intentions, Unwanted Attentions
Carrie placed one booted foot on the back of the pew in front of her, only to have it knocked off by her grandfather. The gray headed man’s somber expression and slight shake of disapproval were not misleading in any way. With a quiet sigh, Carrie turned her attentions back to the preacher at the front of the room. Soon though, she discovered that the harder she tried to listen, the more difficult it became. Boredom and discomfort could not be tolerated at the same time. Her limbs were at an awkward stage in length where her feet didn’t reach the floor, but they didn’t stick straight out in front of her either. It was aggravating, which is why she had placed one foot on the nearby pew only to have her grandfather squelch the notion. In an attempt to assuage the incongruity, she began swinging her legs back and forth, slowly at first and then unconscious of the action, she began to move them faster and faster enjoying the way her heavily shod feet propelled the swinging motion. This moment of delight was soon terminated by Adam, who placed a heavy hand on top of her knees and squeezed hard enough to impress his displeasure with the game.
Noting the implicit warning in her pa’s eyes, Carrie attempted, for a second time, to listen to what the young pastor had to say. For a few minutes the little brunette was successful, and had almost deciphered a point in the sermon when that same old nagging desire to have her feet resting on a surface, returned. Images of swinging her legs to the side and placing them on Grandpa’s knees came to mind, but she wisely terminated the thought. For a fleeting moment Carrie contemplated replacing the offending boot to the back of the pew, but her father, seated on her other side, must have had a premonition, for he placed his large hand on her right knee and gave a slight shake of his head, while maintaining his line of sight on the Reverend.
Carrie resigned herself to discomfort and let her eyes wander about the room. There was not a whole lot she could see from the second pew without turning her head to look behind. She knew that definitely would not be tolerated. Having no desire to be more uncomfortable than she already was, she began studying the first few pews at the left of the room. She noticed her friend Caleb sitting in-between his parents in the row adjacent to theirs. He too looked to be suffering from the same ailment as Carrie, but he kept his eyes locked on the pastor. Carrie could not see the large hand of Caleb’s pa stationed on his knee. As her gaze traveled forward, Carrie spied Ms. Hamilton, the children’s Sunday school teacher. She observed that Ms. Hamilton, like the other adults, seemed to be absorbing the words flowing from Rev. Curtis’ mouth. However, unlike the rest of the surrounding grown-ups, and children for that matter, Ms. Hamilton wore a smile. It was not a toothy grin or anything, but a peaceful smile. Carrie realized she could not remember a time when Ms. Hamilton had not borne a smile. ‘I wonder what she’s happy about,’ Carrie thought, ‘nobody else seems to be happy.’
The young Cartwright began compiling the possible reasons for Ms. Hamilton’s unexplained pleasure when she felt a sharp pinch on her thigh, behind her right knee. Biting her lip to contain the gasp of pain that threatened to escape, she angrily looked to the cause of her injury. The “cause” was standing, holding a hymnal, and staring down at his young daughter with a look of annoyance. Carrie became conscious that the entire congregation had gotten to their feet and she hastened to her own just as the singing began.
After the final stanza had been sung, the deep tones of her pa and grandpa still resonated in Carrie’s ears as the worshipers began filing out of the small building. Exiting the service was a lengthy process as each congregant greeted and thanked the Rev. Curtis for his inspiring words. Ben Cartwright watched with amusement as some of the older patrons offered suggestions and advice to the young preacher in regards to next week’s sermon. The Reverend accepted each member’s remarks graciously and thanked them for coming, assuring those with “concerns” that he would take them to heart. Carrie kept her eyes fixed on the approaching gateway to freedom. As their time to speak with the pastor drew nearer the 8-year-old found her impatience coming to a head. She began to fidget, flapping her hands against the folds in her skirt and stamping her feet as her breathing became louder and more noticeable. “Ouch!” Carrie swung around to find her uncle Hoss towering over her.
“Relax, Youngun, you’ve been fidgety all mornin’. What’s eatin’ you anyway?”
Carrie replaced her scowl with a grin and rubbed the back of her head where Hoss’ hard knuckles had thumped it. “Nothin’s eatin’ me, Uncle Hoss. Just wanna be outside, that’s all.”
“Girl after my own heart,” Hoss replied with a rival grin, “Don’t you worry none; we’ll be outta here soon enough.”
About that time, Carrie turned around and found herself face to face with Rev. Curtis. She had been swept forward by the wave of people and had not noticed how close they were. Adam cleared his throat, from his position behind the little girl, and gave her a gentle nudge. That’s when Carrie become aware of the pastor’s hand extended towards her in salutation. “Oh!” Carrie exclaimed, and offered her own small hand to the man.
“Good morning, Rev. Curtis. You preached an excellent sermon today, sir.”
The young reverend gazed down at the little lady and smiled warmly. “Why thank you, Miss Cartwright, I am glad you enjoyed it. I was not certain that I was appealing to the younger generation.” Carrie just smiled in return and nodded. She was not about to let on to her minister that she could not remember more than two or three words from the morning’s message.
“Well, I’ll see you next Sunday,
Rev. Curtis.” Carrie pulled her hand
from the preacher’s strong grasp and took a step backwards onto her pa’s
foot. Feeling his boot toe beneath her
heel, Carrie turned and issued a quick, “Sorry,
With a smirk, Adam gave his daughter a shove and said, “Go on, and get out of here!” Carrie’s gratitude was plainly written on her face. “Thanks, Pa! Bye, Rev. Curtis!” With that Carrie hurried out the door and into the waiting sunlight while her family watched in laughter.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Freedom! Carrie inhaled deeply and lifted her face to the warm sunshine. For the first time in two hours she was at ease. She never could tolerate being cooped up for too long, whether it be school, church, or the ranch on a rainy day. No, she was made to be outside, ‘one with nature’ her pa called it. Well, what was wrong with that? Who wanted to be locked inside a house while there was a great big world waiting to be explored, where you could utilize all your senses at once? Reveling in her freshly achieved glory, a familiar voice echoed in her ears.
“Carrie! Hey!” Little Caleb Michaelson came running over to the pensive girl.
“Hey, Caleb, how are ya?” Carrie brought her face down from its “sun-kissing” position and directed her gaze at her best friend.
“’Bout time we were outta there, huh?” Caleb exclaimed. The blonde youngster enjoyed being outdoors as much as his companion and the two of them had had many an adventure together while exploring the “unknown”. “I hate having to sit still for so long, don’t you?” Caleb squinted at Carrie, wrinkling his nose in an expression of distaste for the idea.
“Yeah, I know what you mean. Church is okay, I guess, I just wish we could have it outside sometimes.”
“Well, we have Sunday school outside, sometimes…and we had that revival thing outside last year. Remember?” Caleb leaned over to get a closer look at the rock he had been rolling with his toe.
“Yeah, I guess so,” Carrie agreed, “Ms. Hamilton lets us go out more than any other teacher we’ve had. I really like her, don’t you? Have you noticed how she’s always smiling, even during Rev. Curtis’ sermons?”
Caleb picked up the stone he’d been studying and began tossing it into the air, enjoying how the sunlight glanced off the quartz embedded in the rock and made it shine. “I like her too, and now that you mention it…I guess I haven’t seen Ms. Hamilton frowning before.” Caleb grinned, “I bet she even smiles when she’s mad.” And with that he tossed his rock to Carrie.
Carrie instinctively caught the stone and smiled back. Rolling it around in her fingers, feeling the rough edges, she said cheekily, “I wish my pa always smiled when he was mad, wouldn’t make him so scary.”
“So I’m scary when I’m mad?” Adam stood with his arms folded and chuckled as his daughter spun around on her heel and looked up to face him.
“Uh,” Carrie stammered, “you can be…Pa…sometimes.”
“Well, good, I would hate to think you weren’t taking me seriously.” Adam grinned at his baby girl and tweaked her nose, then with one hand on her back he directed her towards the wagon. Saying their ‘good-byes’ to Caleb, Adam helped his daughter along with a playful swat to her backside.
“Hey!” Carrie squealed as she rubbed the stinging area.
“Just trying to motivate you, Sweetheart,” Adam replied as they reached the wagon, “Hop Sing’s waiting for us with lunch and you know how he gets when we’re late.”
“Well, I don’t need that kind of motivation, Pa,” Carrie answered back as she hauled herself into the bed of the vehicle, “Just thinking about Hop Sing’s temper is enough to get me movin’.” As soon as he saw she was in and sitting down, Adam climbed up next to his father and chirruped the horses into a trot, Joe and Hoss traveling behind on their mounts.
The jostling ride home gave Carrie ample time for contemplation. It was indeed a beautiful day, and the bumps of their small journey, which vibrated through the wagon slats, were not conducive for napping. Adam and Ben were engaged in conversation, discussing the various points of interest throughout Rev. Curtis’ sermon and Joe and Hoss seemed to be wrapped up in thoughts of their own.
To pass the time, Carrie began to recall the different children who had attended meeting that day. Many of them were her age and took part in the Sunday school lessons before church. Each peer’s face flashed through Carrie’s mind and she considered them individually. There was Caleb, of course, she had known him all her life and they were best friends. And then there was little Jacob Martin who ended up in the corner of the small Sunday school room almost as much as the schoolhouse’s. Then there was Ada Mae, she was a year older than Carrie with curly red hair and crooked teeth. Carrie was not terribly fond of Ada Mae because of the way Ada Mae tried to boss her all the time. If there was one thing Carrie hated, it was having someone boss her around, unless of course, that someone was a parent or an uncle or a teacher or something. Carrie knew better than to balk at an adult’s instructions.
As the list of children began to unravel in the youngster’s head, one common trait appeared to her. All of her friends had mothers. It was true that not all her companions were governed by their own mothers. Some kids, like Carrie, had lost their mother to illness or accident, but they had stepmothers. ‘I wonder why I don’t have a stepmother,’ Carrie thought. Memories of her mama were vague at best and the only relationship Carrie had with her mother was through the stories her pa told her. The tales and the daguerreotype Carrie kept next to her bed were the only visions she had.
Carrie turned in the cushion of straw in which she was sitting and gazed at the back of her father’s dark head. Many times she had conjured images of her ma and pa together, creating the memories she had heard time and again, memories carried not only by her pa, but by her uncles and grandfather as well. It was hard for Carrie to imagine her father with another female companion, besides herself, but she found she was not opposed to the idea if it would make him more contented. ‘Pa already seems pretty happy to me,’ Carrie observed, ‘but maybe he would be happier if I had a ma. Maybe I would be happier if I had a ma.’
The little girl concluded that it must be better to have a mother than not and arriving at this conclusion, the little matchmaker went to work, hypothetically pairing her father with the sparse available women in town. The list was not an extensive one and it did not take the child long to rule out most of the candidates. As she contemplated ending the notion, a friendly face appeared in her mind, a face that was always smiling. Ms. Hamilton! What was it that Pa was always saying about her ma? Mama was always smiling, that’s what Pa had said. Pa often mentioned to Carrie that one of the reasons she reminded him so much of her ma was because she always carried a cheerful grin. ‘Well, if Pa likes ladies who are always smiling, then surely he would like Ms. Hamilton!’ Carrie decided. Now it was just a matter of making Pa see that Ms. Hamilton would be a good ma. After all, as she and Caleb had exclaimed, ‘I bet she even smiles when she’s mad!’
Absorbed in the planning of her future, Carrie hardly noticed when the wagon came to a halt in front of the house. Sundays were a laid-back time on the Ponderosa, where only the most necessary of chores were attended to, and the day of rest gave the family the opportunity to enjoy each other. Carrie jumped down from the straw-filled conveyance and landed on the dusty soil below. Her uncles had already led their mounts into the barn where they would attend to the animals’ needs before dinner and her father was preparing to do the same with those hitched to the wagon.
Running around the wagon’s slatted side, Carrie caught her grandpa’s hand as he made his way down. Ben Cartwright was not a feeble man by any means and still maintained a hard day’s work, but he was getting older and when the opportunity came to escape the pains of being astride a horse, he took it. He gladly grasped his granddaughter’s hand and led her to the house. No words were exchanged between the two; the look on each one’s face was enough to express all that needed to be said. Ben loved this little lady more than he ever could have imagined possible and if he’d ever romanticized about having a daughter, he’d lived it out these last 8 years. Every day with Carrie was a new experience and he regarded this anomaly in his life with gratitude and thanksgiving. This girl was truly a blessing for all of them. He hoped he might be able to add more “blessings” to his life, through his other sons one day. For now, he was perfectly content with the small one walking beside him. Together they plodded onto the wooden porch and he opened the heavy front door releasing the smells of Hop Sing’s cooking.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After a satisfying meal and a full morning, the Cartwrights made their way to separate corners of the large room. Hoss and Joe amused themselves by starting a checker game at the side table. Hoss had vowed to “whip Joe for sure” because he was tired of losing to his little brother and was certain that his new strategy was unconquerable. There were many things Hoss excelled in over Joe, but mastering the art of checkers was not one of them. This did not keep him from trying however, and the youngest son settled himself for the long haul.
Grandpa Cartwright, seizing the opportunity for a nap, was dozing on the settee and Carrie wondered how he could sleep sitting up. His snores were soft and did not disrupt the harmony of the room. Adam had made himself comfortable in the blue velvet chair next to the fireplace and began perusing a well-worn novel. The sight of this hardly surprised his little daughter for whenever he was not working it seemed, he was reading.
With the only sounds in the room being the gentle snoring of her grandfather, the turning of pages from her pa’s book, and the infrequent outbursts of her competing uncles, Carrie’s thoughts returned to Ms. Hamilton and her father. Unsure of how her pa would react to the idea of ‘a new ma’, Carrie chose to ‘beat around the bush’.
“Hey Pa?” Carrie inquired, putting one hand on each of his knees and peering at him from below his book.
“Hm?” Adam briefly looked down at the cherub face of his daughter.
“What did you like best about my ma?” Carrie rested her chin on Adam’s right knee and looked up into his face.
Adam set his book down on the other knee and placed one hand on his baby girl’s head. He considered her for a moment, gazing into her big dark eyes and contemplated his answer. There were so many things he had loved…cherished…about his wife. He could scarcely choose one of those features that he had held dear, habits and attributes that had become even more precious since her passing.
“Sweetheart, that’s a hard question for me to answer,” Adam smiled down, “one thing that folks used to comment on was your mama’s countenance, uh, her personality. Your mama was the kindest person I ever met; she never knew a stranger and was always the first to offer assistance to those in need. Whether the answer called for food, or a necessary chore or even an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on, she was the first one there…” Adam paused for a moment and then continued, “Your mama was always smiling. No matter how difficult a situation became, she could maintain a pleasant, calming expression on her face, one that no person could stay tense with…including me.” With that Adam rewarded his daughter with a grin and stroked the wavy curls that graced her head. “It wasn’t very often that I saw your mama mad, and when she was, I was the most likely culprit.”
Carrie realigned her gaze and studied her father’s hands. One was resting on his left knee, beside her head and she traced the veins and lines with her eyes, reaching over and gently squeezing two of his fingers. Adam returned the squeeze and lifted her chin up with his other hand. “Why do you ask, honey?” he questioned, wondering if there was an ulterior motive behind her query.
“I was just curious is all,” Carrie responded and she brought her head back down and continued to stare at her father’s hand. Adam merely raised his eyebrow a bit and resigned himself to her answer. He knew what it was like to wonder about a lost parent; he still had moments when he speculated, ‘what if?’ ‘It’s going to get harder,’ he thought to himself, ‘the older she gets, the more questions both of us are going to have.’ Temporarily shaking the worry out of his mind, he reached over with his free hand and brought the book back up to a position where he could resume his reading.
For several moments, the two of them sat there in that state, Adam reading, Carrie curled up at his feet, holding onto his hand. It was a picture of quiet serenity when a slew of checkers suddenly hit the ground, shattering the peaceful scene, and the perpetrator jumped to his feet. The loser of the game, evidently, was Hoss because in his exasperation with the situation, he had made a grand gesticulation with his hand and wiped his side of the board clean with the stroke. Due to the sudden clatter of rolling checkers, Little Joe’s uncontrolled laughter and Hoss’ frustrated utterances, Ben Cartwright awoke with a snort and turned his head to view the disturbance.
“What’s going on over there?” he demanded in a tone loud enough to interrupt the commotion.
“Oh nothin’, Pa,” Joe managed to say in-between giggles, “Hoss has just been provin’ to me how great his strategy is,” Joe grinned at his big brother and ducked as a hand swept over his head.
“
“Well, I don’t care what the reasons are…take your strategies, your argument, and your noise, somewhere ELSE!” Ben refolded his arms across his chest and settled back down into his corner of the settee keeping the grumpy expression on his face in hopes that it would deter further outbursts.
Carrie gazed at her uncles in amusement. They acted like kids sometimes, no older than she. She didn’t stifle her giggles and turned to her pa to witness his response. He rolled his eyes at his siblings and continued reading. Realizing this was the distraction she needed to ask her pa another question, Carrie again interrupted his thoughts.
“Pa?” Carrie continued holding on to his hand.
“Hm?” Adam replied as he usually did.
“What do you think about Ms. Hamilton?” Carrie had to know whether her pa even liked Ms. Hamilton. If he didn’t like her, there was no way her plan was going to work.
Adam didn’t put his book down this time but continued to stare at the page and said, “Your Sunday school teacher?”
“Yeah, Pa, what do you think of her?”
“Well, she’s a very nice lady,” Adam answered, pondering the cause of this random questioning. Meanwhile, Joe and Hoss were trying to work out their dispute without reawakening their father.
“I think so too,
Adam placed his book down again, “doesn’t have any,” he corrected and then answered her by saying, “Well, I suppose the reason would be that Ms. Hamilton has never been married that I’m aware of.”
“Oh,” Carrie said looking down for a moment, “I’ll bet that Ms. Hamilton would love to have some younguns of her own, don’t you, Pa?” Carrie looked back up at her father with a big smile gracing her face. Adam arched his left eyebrow and looked down at Carrie with a puzzled expression. He also noticed that she was picking up more of her uncle Hoss’ clichés.
“Perhaps,” he responded, “but that’s really none of our business.”
“Oh, Pa,” Carrie patted his knee, “I bet Ms. Hamilton would make a great ma!”
Adam shook his head and picked his book back up. “She probably would, Carrie. Maybe she’ll have children of her own one day.” He began his reading again hoping to make it through the next paragraph before Carrie asked any more questions.
For a few moments, Carrie was silent as she considered her next inquiry. Just as Adam thought the conversation was over she piped up, “Why do you think she’s not married, Pa? There’s nothing wrong with Ms. Hamilton, is there?”
Twinges of exasperation began to stir within him, but Adam answered her by saying, “No Carrie, there is nothing wrong with Ms. Hamilton that I can tell. Some women just don’t get married. That’s the way it is. I am sure Ms. Hamilton would make a wonderful mother and a good and loving wife…but she hasn’t met the right man yet. Okay?”
“’
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Throughout the week, Carrie continued asking her father assorted questions, questions that were seemingly unrelated. At each new query, Adam would respond as well as he could and decided that it was just her natural child-like curiosity spurring the stream of interruptions. All the boys had gone through it and he, himself, knew that he had questioned everything as a child. It was the best way to learn and resigned that she was simply doing the same thing. What he didn’t know was that Carrie was compiling a mental list of all his answers so that she could compare them with Ms. Hamilton’s the next Sunday. Carrie assumed that if a woman represented all of her father’s favorite things, then he would be incapable of not loving her.
Adam’s favorite color was blue, although this answer made Carrie wonder why he always wore so much black. His favorite food was chicken pie and his favorite novel was Moby Dick. She knew her pa loved to read and the story of the great white whale was one of many at the top of his list. He also loved poetry and books that detailed new theories involving architecture, engineering, blueprints and schematics. Carrie was pretty sure Ms. Hamilton wouldn’t care too much for the latter, but was confident that she was a person who enjoyed poetry and good books.
Carrie’s father also liked to sing and play his guitar, a hobby that the little girl held in higher esteem than any of his other habits. She loved hearing her father’s rich baritone voice smoothly lulling her to sleep. He did this almost every night when he put her to bed, and she had heard Ms. Hamilton sing some songs during Sunday school. The warm-hearted teacher may not have had the most pleasing voice to the ear, but she could carry a tune and Carrie counted this an asset.
Carrie did not even consider the issue of physical attraction. Her pa had always told her not to judge a person by the way they looked and the only thought she had given to Ms. Hamilton’s appearance was that she needed to wear items of blue, her pa’s favorite color. Her devoted teacher had no striking irregularities in her appearance other than a tiny pair of spectacles that always sat right above the end of her nose. The fact that Ms. Hamilton was at least 10 years older than her papa did not concern her either. She didn’t notice, or didn’t care. The most crucial facets were that Ms. Hamilton was a single lady who loved children and was always smiling, which is what her Pa had said he liked most about her ma. It had to work.
After composing an impressive list of favorable traits from her pa, Carrie traveled to school the next morning with a burden on her mind. The early hours of the day were cool and the damp scent of the morning filled Carrie’s nostrils as she made her way to school. Her chaperone that day was her uncle Joe and he rode alongside her at a moderate pace. Several times he had attempted to make conversation with his niece and each time she had responded with a single word or a shrug, if she responded at all.
“Carrie, honey, are you alright?” Joe asked the girl.
“Hm?” Carrie responded in a manner identical to her pa.
“I asked you if you were alright,” Joe studied the girl’s face and started to reach over to feel her forehead. Carrie recoiled from his touch and pushed his arm away.
“I’m fine, Uncle Joe. I’m not sick.” Carrie kept her eyes focused on the path ahead. “I’m just thinkin’ is all.”
Joe considered her for a moment and asked, “Do you have a problem? Is it anything I can help with?”
Carrie looked back over at her uncle, “No Uncle Joe, it’s nothin’ like that. I’ve just got a few things on my mind.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Joe asked again.
“Not really, Uncle Joe. Don’t worry about me, I’m alright,” she informed him with a smile.
“Well, okay. But if you decide you wanna talk about it, I’m here to listen, ok?” Joe returned the smile to his niece and attempted to muss her dark waves.
Again avoiding his reach, Carrie grinned up at her uncle and assured him she would. At the moment, she didn’t think it would be wise to inform her family of her plans, or at least of her goal. The problem was that she was having difficulty arriving at a fool-proof strategy that would ensure her pa’s and Ms. Hamilton’s ending up together. Carrie had all the necessary tools to work with (her pa’s likes and dislikes etc.) she just didn’t have a blueprint from which to follow.
Before long, the duo arrived at the schoolyard and Joe helped the little girl remove her saddle from the pony and make Biscuit comfortable before he continued into town.
“You gonna be alright, Shorty?” Joe teased.
Carrie shielded her eyes from the sun and gazed up at him. “I’ll be alright, Little Joe,” she responded with a giggle and ran towards the entrance of the schoolhouse.
‘I’m never gonna shake that nickname,’ Joe
fumed to himself as he urged his horse into a walk and continued down the path
towards
During their morning break, Caleb found Carrie sitting cross-legged under a cedar tree near the side fence of the schoolyard.
“Hey Carrie, whatcha doin’?” Caleb greeted his friend.
Carrie looked up in response to the question and greeted her blonde companion. Earlier in the week, Caleb had participated in a wrestling match with his older brothers and lost. He was now sporting a shiner on his left eye but his smile remained intact and the little boy beamed. The young lad was rarely in a foul mood and this was the most likely reason he and Carrie got on so well. They were of similar dispositions.
Carrie answered Caleb’s question by telling him that she was “thinkin’ ‘bout somethin’.” Caleb joined her on the ground and leaning his back against the rough bark of the cedar, began shredding the blades of grass at his feet.
“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” Caleb replied.
“Caleb, do you ever think it’s strange that I don’t have a ma?” Carrie asked him.
After a second’s meditation, Caleb replied, “No, lots of people don’t have ma’s.”
“All of our friends have ma’s,” Carrie answered, “or step-ma’s.”
Caleb considered this development in her argument and after a moment succumbed to her assessment. “Yeah, I guess they do. I never really thought about it before.”
“Well, that’s ‘cause you have a ma,” Carrie informed him.
“What do you want a ma for?” Caleb asked her, incredulity on his face. Caleb had often envied the fact that Carrie only had one parent. That was one less person to get in trouble with. Of course he thought it was sad that her mother had died, but neither of them had ever known her mother and since her pa didn’t speak of it often, or seem upset, they didn’t dwell on it much. At least he had thought she didn’t dwell on the subject. Carrie’s pa took care of her real well and she had her uncles and her grandpa. Caleb had never met his extended family. The Cartwrights had a cook too, one of the purposes of a mother, in Caleb’s eyes.
“Maybe I’m supposed to have one. If everybody else does, shouldn’t I? Maybe I’m not normal if I don’t have a ma.” Carrie turned to her friend.
Carrie’s ‘normalness’ was one of her most endearing qualities in Caleb’s eyes. After all, Carrie was a girl, but she was the best friend Caleb had. “You’re normaler than anybody I know, Carrie,” Caleb exclaimed.
“Normaler’s not a word, Caleb…but thanks.” Carrie turned away and began to pluck the grass stems at her own feet and peeling away the layers, tossed the pieces onto the ground.
“Caleb?”
“Yeah?” Caleb replied, tossing his grass aside.
“I’m workin’ on a plan to get me a new ma, but I’m going to need your help,” Carrie looked into her friend’s big blue eyes with her equally large brown ones and smiles broke out on the children’s faces.
“You know I’ll help you with anything you want me to,” Caleb reminded his partner.
“Good…what we need to do is…” Carrie’s voice trailed off as she and Caleb whispered their ideas back and forth
As the school day came to a close, the children, who knew it was Friday, began to fidget in their seats and their attention waned. Mr. Hudson also looked forward to the respite from his toils and the ongoing restlessness from his pupils did not escape his watchful eye. Glancing at his timepiece he made the decision to forgo the last 10 minutes of class and release his small scholars, early. This is the opportunity Carrie and Caleb had been awaiting since their first break that morning. Pushed out the front doors by the throng of their excited classmates, it did not take long for Carrie to spot her uncle Hoss who had arrived a few minutes early to pick her up. Although Carrie had promised her family that she would never again pull a stunt like she had a few weeks before, her uncles made a point to get there a few minutes early from then on. All grins, the two schemers approached Carrie’s large uncle and began to work their wiles.
“Hey there, Caleb, how’re you?” Hoss dismounted and took the youngster’s small hand in his own large one.
“Hi, Mr. Hoss, I’m great, how are you, sir?” Caleb pumped the rough hand up and down exuberantly.
With an amused grin of his own, Hoss answered Caleb’s cheerful greeting and turned to his niece. “What about you, Pumpkin, how’re you?”
“I’m just fine, Uncle Hoss,” Carrie turned on the charm. She had hoped that her middle uncle would be picking her up from school that day, for some reason he was always a little easier to manipulate than the rest of her family. “Say, Uncle Hoss, can Caleb come home with us this afternoon and maybe spend the weekend? His ma and pa could pick him up at church on Sunday.” Carrie looked up at her uncle, blinking her long eyelashes and forming what she hoped was a convincing expression of innocence and need on her face. Caleb, meanwhile, was on his best behavior with his hands clasped behind his back and a rival expression of purity and desire.
“Well,” Hoss considered, “I guess that would be alright, you’ve been pretty good these last few weeks, Pumpkin, although it would be best if we asked your pa first.”
Carrie looked down at her shoes and sighed, “Aw, Uncle Hoss, if we go all the way home to ask Pa it’ll be dark by the time we can go get Caleb and so Pa will say it’s too late and then he’ll put it off tomorrow until late afternoon and by then I won’t get to spend any time with Caleb because we’ll have to eat supper and go to bed and then go to church and then his ma and pa will pick him up and the weekend will be over,” Carrie argued as only an 8-year-old can.
Hoss marveled at his niece’s ability to reason with him. She was quite the debater and though her pleas were a bit exaggerated, they did make sense. ‘Well, surely Adam wouldn’t have a problem with this. She’s behaved the last few weeks…if it’s not alright, I’ll just take him home.’ And with that Hoss gave into the little girl’s whims.
The large man reached over and tousled Carrie’s hair. With mock annoyance, Carrie smoothed the mussed hairs back down. “We need to stop by your house and work things out with your ma and pa, Caleb. Are you sure they can do without ya, all weekend?”
“Sure Hoss, I’ve been real good this week; I’ve got somethin’ comin’ to me.” Hoss smirked at the blonde lad and his black eye, “You sure what you’ve got comin’ is somethin’ good?” he teased.
Caleb stuck out his lower lip in a playful pout and assured Hoss it was something good. Hoss walked to the two playmates over to the stable where their horses were waiting and helped them to saddle up. After mounting they made their way to Mr. Michaelson’s blacksmith shop near the town’s livery.
The little boy’s father proved more difficult to convince than Carrie’s easy-going uncle, but at long last he consented. Before releasing his charge, however, he made sure that Caleb left with numerous directives on his conduct, ringing in his ears. Satisfied that his son had been duly advised, the blacksmith redirected his attentions to Hoss and informed him that the Cartwrights had complete autonomy to “warm Caleb’s britches” if the situation arose.
Caleb’s cheeks had begun to crimson and Hoss put the youngster at ease by saying, “Well, I’ll pass that onto Adam, Shad, but I doubt that’s gonna be necessary.” Caleb’s breath whooshed out and he looked at Carrie with large eyes as though to say, ‘it’d better not be necessary’. Carrie returned the look with what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
“It better not be,” Shad voiced his son’s thoughts and cast a warning gaze upon his young son and then his expression relaxed and he allowed a grin to break through the sweat and smoke on his face. “Go on,” he admonished, “And have fun. I’ll tell your ma.” He reached down with a grimy hand and ruffled Caleb’s blonde hair, sending him on his way with a playful swat to his bottom.
“Thanks, Pa!” Caleb yelled back, nearly tripping over a stone in the road. Shad Michaelson watched his excited child stumble over to the waiting horse and smiled to himself. Shaking his head he bent back over the horseshoe he’d been working on and realized how quickly his children were growing up. Caleb was the baby and he was already nine. Maybe it was time to add a few more younguns to the Michaelson family. The burly blacksmith resolved to mention the matter to his wife that evening after the children had gone to bed, and began reshaping the heated iron.
Before the trio could head back to the ranch Hoss announced that he had a few errands that needed attending. The two youths could scarcely believe their luck. Ms. Hamilton owned a small bakery near the mercantile where Hoss needed to pick up a few items for Hop Sing. Armed with the little Cantonese man’s grocery list, he instructed the duo to wait for him outside.
“Um, Uncle Hoss?” Carrie asked, “We’re right here at Ms. Hamilton’s bakery, do you mind if Caleb and I run in to say hi?” Carrie flashed her teeth at her benevolent uncle and Caleb followed her lead.
“Well, I guess that’d be alright. I’ll only be a few minutes, you two stay out of trouble,” and Hoss entered the mercantile, leaving the children on their own.
“Why does everyone keep telling us to ‘stay out of trouble’?” Caleb asked his companion.
Carrie shrugged her shoulders and swung her right leg down off her horse and pulled her left foot from the stirrup. Caleb did the same and they clomped down the boardwalk to their teacher’s modest shop.
A little bell tinkled over their heads as they pushed through the door to the bakery and their nostrils were filled with the sweet, doughy, fragrance of baked breads and confections. Carrie’s mouth began to water and her stomach felt as though she had never eaten lunch. Caleb’s belly was sending him the same message and the two children found themselves drawn to the display of freshly baked loaves, cakes, and cookies.
“Good afternoon, Carrie, Caleb,” Ms. Hamilton greeted her church-time pupils warmly. “You two look hungry, would you like to sample what I’ve been working on today?”
Carrie and Caleb looked at each other and then at their teacher and nodded eagerly. Ms. Hamilton smiled knowingly and retrieved for each of them a thick slice of freshly baked soda bread, lavishly spread with creamy butter and a smaller slice of the spice cake she had cooked earlier that morning. Carrie was so hypnotized by the joy of her tastebuds that she almost forgot her reasons for coming into the older woman’s store.
“At least you know she can cook,” Caleb whispered in her ear through a mouthful of bread.
“Shh,” Carrie admonished and politely swallowed before addressing the kind baker. “Ms. Hamilton, I see you’re wearing a blue dress today. Is that your favorite color?” Carrie looked into Ms. Hamilton’s bespectacled gray eyes and smiled sweetly.
“As a matter of fact it is, Carrie. Do you like it?” Ms. Hamilton smoothed the wrinkles out of the front of her skirt and absent-mindedly patted the bun at the back of her head.
“Oh yes, Ms. Hamilton,” Carrie quickly assured her, “I think it’s one of the prettiest dresses I’ve seen you in, ma’am.” Carrie silently observed Ms. Hamilton’s flattered response and continued down her trail of questioning. Caleb just watched the scene play out in quiet awe.
During the following few minutes, Carrie managed to wheedle the answers to several of the questions on her list including Ms. Hamilton’s favorite pastimes, the book the Sunday school teacher most enjoyed, the lady’s favorite poet, and her favorite hymn. Deciding this was enough material to work with, Carrie changed the subject to the upcoming Sunday school lesson, mentally filing each of her teacher’s answers in her mind. The children did not have to wait much longer before Hoss Cartwright’s large frame filled the doorway of the small bakery.
“Afternoon, Ms. Hamilton, ma’am. I believe these two’re mine.” Hoss removed his hat and walked towards the children.
“Good afternoon, Hoss. The children have just been regaling me with conversation. They are full of questions today,” she smiled and focused her eyes on each of the youths. “Can I interest you in some freshly baked soda bread, Hoss?” Ms. Hamilton swiftly sliced a thick piece of the crusty loaf and slathered it with rich butter.
Receiving the delight from Ms. Hamilton’s hands, Hoss grinned and took a bite, moaning his approval. “Mm, mm, Ms. Hamilton, you shore do know the way to a man’s heart, ma’am. This is some of the best tasting bread I’ve ever had, and that is the truth.” Hoss quickly devoured the rest of the snack and brushed the crumbs from his hands. “Well, I reckon we better be going. See ya in church, ma’am.” Hoss placed one large hand on the backs of each child and led them to the door.
“Bye, Ms. Hamilton, see you in Sunday school,” the children waved at the woman and in a moment found themselves blinking in the bright sunlight. The first part of Carrie’s plan was carried out and the big part remained, the part where her pa would realize that he was the perfect man for Ms. Hamilton, and she was the perfect ma for Carrie.
The weekend flew for the ambitious youngsters. Adam was slightly perturbed at Caleb’s arrival without his permission, but the moment passed and the children were soon out enjoying themselves and leaving the more adult Cartwrights to attend their business. Carrie had chores around the ranch, as did most of her friends, and Caleb was more than willing to help. They had often assisted each other in their duties when visiting at the other friend’s house and this weekend was no different. With two workers to get the job done, the chores were finished in record speed leaving more time for the conspirators to plan Adam Cartwright’s fate.
Adam discovered his two hopefuls, Saturday evening, halfway buried beneath the straw in the loft, their voices rising and falling in laughter and hushed tones of excitement. ‘I wonder what they’re up to now,’ he thought. Adam was glad that Carrie and Caleb were such good friends; he knew it must be hard for her sometimes to be the only child on the ranch, let alone the only female. Their old friend Shaunessy, had come out often, after Adam’s wife died, and tried to accustom Adam to the ways of raising a little girl on his own. She still rode out to the Ponderosa when she could and provided at each visit, additional instructions on the raising of the Cartwright girl in attempts to make Adam’s job easier and relieve some of his worries.
“Kids, it’s time to come down for supper,” Adam called loudly enough to be heard in the loft.
The happy chattering abruptly ceased and two little heads peeked over the side of the loft. “Oh hey, Pa,” Carrie answered, her eyes wide wondering what her pa had overheard. Neither of the children had heard him enter the barn. “We’ll be down in a second.”
“All right, we’re waiting. And make sure you clean up before coming to the table.” Adam turned on his heel and exited the barn.
“Whew, that was a close one, Carrie. Do you think he heard us?” Caleb asked his partner.
Carrie shook her head and began making her way to the ladder leading down to the ground floor. “I don’t know, Caleb. I don’t think so; he would have asked some questions. Come on, I’m starving!” And with that, the playmates skipped over the last two steps of the ladder and jumped to the hard dirt floor below, racing each other to the main entrance of the ranch and in their hunger, forgetting to wash up.
It took Adam more than an hour to get the children to settle down that night. The two rascals had been subjected to baths that evening, in preparation for church the following morning and the action seemed to have riled them all the more. He had allowed them to share Carrie’s room, Carrie on her bed and Caleb on a pallet on the floor. The children were still young and Adam saw no harm in it, except that they couldn’t seem to control their chattering and go to sleep. Only after two warnings and a threat to take Mr. Michaelson up on his offer of ‘warming’ Caleb’s and Carrie’s britches did the two children lower their voices and make an attempt at sleep. Carrie found herself too excited to rest because she was going to launch her final campaign at dinner the next day.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
The sun rose early on the Ponderosa and soon after the roosters’ announcement of the dawn, scrumptious odors of breakfast pleasures wafted through the children’s bedroom. Hurriedly they dressed, Carrie using her room and Caleb dressing in Adam’s and made their way down the stairs for the morning meal.
The Sunday services passed quickly for once and Carrie was surprised when the final hymn was announced. Caleb’s parents had retrieved him after Sunday school so the two were no longer sitting together. He would not be present for the noon meal either, which was when Carrie was going to execute their plan.
As soon as the services had concluded, Carrie impatiently waited in the line of worshipers exiting the meetinghouse. She had to catch Ms. Hamilton before the unsuspecting woman left for home. Finally breaking through the crowd of people gathered around the main entrance of the church, Carrie spied Ms. Hamilton speaking with old Mrs. Crenshaw.
Without wanting to interrupt the ladies’ conversation Carrie waited patiently, at a polite distance, from the visiting friends. She did not want to appear as though she was eavesdropping, but she was eager to speak with Ms. Hamilton before her pa called her to the wagon. The elder of the two ladies took notice of the healthy, dark headed little girl beside them and welcomed her into the conversation. “How are you this morning, Miss Cartwright?” the elderly woman asked the young brunette.
“I am doing well, ma’am,” Carrie answered as politely as she could, “and how are you today, Mrs. Crenshaw?”
Wrinkles formed at the edges of Mrs. Crenshaw’s eyes as she smiled warmly at Carrie. “I too, am quite well, Carrie. Thank you for asking,” the older lady glanced from Carrie’s face to Ms. Hamilton’s and saw where the youngster’s attentions seemed to be directed. “If I am not mistaken, I believe you need to speak with Ms. Hamilton, here. Am I correct?” She continued to smile at Carrie while gently patting the little girl’s shoulder.
Carrie flushed a bit and hastened to say, “Well, yes ma’am, but I did not mean to interrupt your conversation.”
“Oh not at all,” Mrs. Crenshaw waved her hand dismissively in the air, “We were just visiting and I need to take my leave, I have a dinner to put on the table. Good afternoon, Grace. Good afternoon, Carrie.” And the sprightly woman turned her back on the two younger folks and made her way to her buggy.
‘Grace?’ Carrie thought to herself. Ms. Hamilton had a first name? Carrie had never considered Ms. Hamilton having any other name than ‘Ms. Hamilton’. It made sense that she would have a first name, her father needed to be able to call her something other than ‘Ms. Hamilton’ didn’t he? She didn’t think she would be able to get away with calling her teacher anything other than her formal name…at least until her name was ‘ma.’
“Ms. Hamilton, I was wondering if I could interest you in coming to dinner at our house this afternoon,” Carrie recited the invitation that she had been practicing in her mind all morning. She was pleased that the older woman was wearing the blue dress Carrie had complimented at the bakery a few days earlier. The little Cartwright decided she better make the invitation sound more official, so she added, “My pa says he would love it if you would come.” Her pa had not actually said any such thing, but she had every confidence that he would have, had he known his daughter’s intentions.
Grace Hamilton’s cheeks flushed a bit at Carrie’s mention of her father’s delight. “Why Carrie, I would be honored to share a meal with your family. When will you be dining?”
“We’ll be eating in an hour or so most likely. Hop Sing doesn’t make us wait too long after we get back from church.” Carrie smiled brightly, pleased that her plan was unfolding so favorably.
“Well,” Ms. Hamilton considered, “I would need to make a brief stop at my home before heading out to the Ponderosa. I don’t want to arrive empty handed, I’ll pick up some of the goods I baked yesterday. Might you wait for me until then? It shouldn’t take too long.” The unsuspecting lady adjusted the eyeglasses that had slid to the end of her nose and waited for Carrie’s response.
“That’d be just fine, ma’am. We’ll be expecting you,” and Carrie turned her head at her father’s call. Seeing his daughter speaking with her Sunday school teacher, Adam waved at the two of them and beckoned his little girl over towards the wagon where Ben Cartwright had already seated himself. Waving goodbye, Carrie ran to where her family was waiting and jumped into the back of the wagon.
Carrie watched Ms. Hamilton get into her buggy and urge her horse down the path towards her bakery and home before saying anything to her pa.
“Pa?” Carrie hesitated, “um, I invited Ms. Hamilton to dinner today. I hope that’s all right.”
Adam turned from the driver’s seat to look at his baby girl, settling herself on the cushion of hay that the wagon provided. Raising his eyebrows he reprimanded Carrie for not asking his permission before she invited her friend to dinner, but ended by saying he ‘supposed it would be all right.’ Carrie knew she had pushed her luck that weekend, first by inviting Caleb without permission and now her teacher and realized that she had probably not heard the end of the matter. But, as long as she was not in immediate trouble and her pa had agreed to Ms. Hamilton’s visit to the ranch, everything would be all right. In fact, things were going better than planned because Ms. Hamilton was bringing some of her wares to share with the household and her pa would be allowed to sample Ms. Hamilton’s capabilities.
As soon as the wagon came to a halt in front of the barn, Carrie hopped out of the back and ran into the ranch house to notify Hop Sing of their extra guest. Expecting Ms. Hamilton within the next few minutes, Carrie positioned herself on the front porch to await her arrival. While she was waiting, Carrie observed her uncles and pa unhitch the team and lead the animals into the stables. Carrie sat at the edge of the rocking chair seat, she had chosen and pushed with her legs in order to achieve a precarious back and forth motion from her little throne. Not much pleasure was derived from this activity, however, because she soon felt the steadying hand of her grandfather weighting the back of her seat.
“Easy, Darling,” he gently scolded, “you’re liable to fly right out of that chair.”
“Sorry, Grandpa,” Carrie apologized, “I’m just excited is all.” Carrie thought for a few moments and blurted out, “Grandpa, do you think Pa will ever get married again?”
Benjamin Cartwright was stunned. Whatever he had expected his granddaughter to say, it wasn’t that. Ben ran a hand through the silver hair on his head and stumbled over his response. “I really don’t know, Sweetheart. I think that is a question best presented to your father.” The older man leaned over the back of the little girl’s chair and placed a large hand on each shoulder. “Carrie,” he inquired, “why do you ask?”
Carrie shrugged, “I was just wonderin’.”
“Well, you’ll have to put your thoughts on hold for the moment. Your dinner guest has arrived.” Ben removed his hands from the youngest Cartwright’s shoulders and moved to welcome their guest.
“Hello, Grace. How are you?” Ben greeted the Sunday school teacher warmly.
Carrie did not miss a beat and ran over to Ms. Hamilton’s side. “Hey, Ms. Hamilton, I’m so glad you’re here.”
“Why thank you, Carrie. I am glad to be here,” Ms. Hamilton flashed one of her famous smiles the little girl’s way and presented the child with her contribution to the meal.
“Those look wonderful, Grace, but you didn’t need to go to all that trouble,” Ben assured their visitor.
“Oh, it was no trouble at all, Ben. I baked them yesterday and thought you folks might enjoy them.”
“We will at that, Ma’am,” Hoss approached the three friends after attending to his horse, “If these bear any resemblance to what I tasted the other day, Pa, we’re in for a real treat. I can hardly wait to get my hands on ‘em.” Hoss looked longingly at the baked goodies wrapped in white linen cloths and licked his lips.
“Uh, Carrie, why don’t you take these in to Hop Sing before your Uncle Hoss leaves us with nothing but crumbs,” Ben instructed the beaming girl beside him.
“Sure, Grandpa,” Carrie took the loaves in her arms and entered the house. Ben escorted Ms. Hamilton into the large room and the boys took up the rear.
Throughout the course of the meal, the Cartwrights maintained friendly conversation with their guest. Carrie had seen to it that Ms. Hamilton was seated directly across from her pa. She had considered placing them beside each other but thought it might be more difficult to develop rapport that way. Satisfied with the seating arrangement, Carrie placed herself next to her friend and absorbed the casual chitchat as she started on her meal.
During a lull in the conversation, Carrie decided to put her plan into action. In order for her pa to fall in love with Ms. Hamilton, he had to be shown their common interests. “Pa,” Carrie spoke up, “Don’t you like Ms. Hamilton’s dress? I think it’s awfully pretty.” Carrie smiled and looked from her table companion’s face to her father’s. The older woman blushed and Adam cleared his throat before saying, “Yes, Carrie, I think it is a lovely dress.” He concluded with a polite smile for their caller.
“It’s blue, Pa,” Carrie informed him as though he could not see this for himself, “Pa’s favorite color is blue, Ms. Hamilton.”
“Mine too, Carrie. Your father has excellent taste,” Grace rewarded Carrie with a smile and looked back down at her plate, taking a particular interest in the snow peas Hop Sing had prepared.
With no desire for anymore awkward pauses, Ben changed the subject and mentioned the recent negotiations with the local Paiute tribes. This was an area of little interest to Carrie, she was preoccupied with other matters and hardly even heard the words of those around her.
When talk of the Indians had ceased, Carrie jumped at the opportunity to open a new floor of discussion. “Ms. Hamilton loves Alfred Lord Tennyson, Pa, she said so the other day. That’s your favorite poet too, isn’t it Pa?”
Adam shot his daughter a puzzled look, “He is one of my favorites, Carrie, yes. But I enjoy others as well.”
“Why don’t you recite one of his poems for her, Pa?” Carrie pleaded.
“Not right now, honey,” Adam cleared his throat and began to change the subject again but Carrie beat him to the punch.
“What about a song then, Pa? Ms. Hamilton loves music too, even though she doesn’t sing as good as you…”
“Carrie!” Adam’s voice was raised this time and there was an unspoken warning in his tone. “I’m sorry, Grace, she gets a little excited sometimes.”
“No apology is necessary, Adam. I am fully aware that my musical abilities are no match for yours.” She smiled graciously at the man seated before her and patted Carrie’s hand.
It was Carrie’s turn to blush. She hadn’t meant to insult her teacher, she just wanted Ms. Hamilton and her pa to make a connection.
Adam smiled back and stated, “I am sure you have a lovely voice. Carrie often comes home singing the songs she learns in your class.”
Sensing the opportunity to promote her friend again, Carrie declared, “She makes the best bread and cake in town, Pa. She let me and Caleb try some the other day.”
“That I can vouch for,” Hoss chimed in, “and I would be delighted if I could sample a piece right now, ma’am.”
Ms. Hamilton’s expression revealed her pleasure at the compliment and as if on cue, Hop Sing brought the two loaves to the table for the family to enjoy.
After the meal was over, the party retired to the main living room to continue conversations carried over from the meal. Despite further requests from Carrie for her father to sing and recite poetry, the discussion continued smoothly for the adults and before long, Ms. Hamilton arose announcing her need to depart.
Carrie jumped to her feet, as did the men in the room and followed Ms. Hamilton and her father to the door. Hoss preceded the trio, and brought the lady’s buggy up to the porch. As the family issued their farewells, Carrie saw her plan unraveling in her face. It hadn’t worked, her pa wasn’t anymore in love with Ms. Hamilton now, than he had been the week before. With a sense of urgency, she tugged on her pa’s coat sleeve.
“Pa,” she implored, “aren’t you going to ask Ms. Hamilton to come back?”
Adam looked at his daughter again with a perplexed expression and directed his focus towards his little girl’s friend. “Ms. Hamilton is welcome to visit whenever she pleases, you know that.” Adam took the woman’s hand and helped her into the front seat of the black buggy.
“No, Pa, I mean…” Carrie stalled, “don’t…don’t you want Ms. Hamilton to go somewhere with you sometime…so you can be together, just the two of you?”
Adam almost swallowed his tongue. He studied the older lady in front of him and watched as a red line crept from the neck of her blouse to the top of her forehead, turning her whole face a bright shade of crimson. He looked at his daughter and was at a loss for words. Stammering an apology to the beloved teacher, he ordered Carrie to get in the house and redirected his attentions back to their embarrassed guest. After seeing the woman off, with numerous apologies and assurances of his ignorance of Carrie’s intentions, a flustered and slightly mortified Adam stormed back into the main room where his daughter sat waiting for him on the settee.
“Pa?” Carrie started but was cut off by a look from her father.
“Carrie, go to your room,” Adam ordered, snapping his fingers and pointing at the staircase in a manner very much like his father’s.
Ben, Joe and Hoss had been present for the humiliating exchange between Adam and Grace Hamilton and up to this point had been too shocked to say a word. Not wishing to wait around for the ‘fireworks’ Joe excused himself to the barn and Hoss followed his little brother’s lead, leaving father and son in the living room.
“Pa, I had no idea she wanted me to fall for Ms. Hamilton,” Adam spoke through his hands, which were covering his face. He had set himself down on the settee and was staring at his boots through his fingers. “What on earth would have given her the idea that Grace and I might be attracted to each other?"
“I don’t know, Son. Come to think of it, she asked me prior to the woman’s arrival, if I thought you would ever marry again. I told her to ask you.” Ben sat down on the arm of the settee and crossed his long legs. “How would you have answered her, Son?” Ben pried gently.
Adam removed his hands from his face and stared at his pa. How would he have answered his daughter? He himself, had wondered if he would ever remarry and though he was not opposed to the idea, he had no current desire for it. There were certainly no prospects at the moment and he could only guess at what had placed the notion in Carrie’s mind.
“I would have explained to her how much her mother meant to me, Pa, and I would have told her that one day I might meet another woman I could love, but it would never change the love that I felt and still have for her mother.” Images of Carrie’s mama flooded Adam’s mind and he felt a wave of loneliness wash over him.
“Why don’t you go up and tell her that now?” Ben coaxed, casting his eyes on the staircase leading up to Carrie’s room.
“I think I will, Pa. Wish me luck,” Adam got to his feet and made his way across the room.
Ben watched his eldest son advance towards the staircase and shook his head in empathy. “Good luck, Son,” he said quietly as he offered up a silent prayer for wisdom and guidance on behalf of his child.
Carrie was sitting on her bed, fighting back tears, and listening for her father’s footsteps in the hall. She had never intended for anyone to get embarrassed and here she had succeeded in humiliating not only her Sunday school teacher, but her father and herself as well. Carrie felt horrible over the outcome of her ‘planning’ and worried not so much for her, but for the feelings of her pa and her kind friend. Hoping she had not caused irreparable damage to all of their relationships, her ears caught the familiar sound of heavy bootfalls outside her door.
Knocking once, Adam let himself into the sunny bedroom where his bereft, little girl sat meekly on her bed, chewing nervously on her lower lip, a habit she had inherited from her mother.
Before her father could say anything, Carrie opened the discussion by apologizing. “Sorry, Pa. I didn’t mean to embarrass you, honest.” She looked down at her lap, unable to look her papa in the eyes.
Adam cupped her chin in his right hand and lifted her eyes till they were peering into his. Gazing intently into his baby’s face, shifting his glance from her right eye then to her left, he responded quietly with a question. “Carrie, why did you ask Ms. Hamilton to the Ponderosa today?” He cocked an eyebrow and awaited her reply.
Feeling that honesty was the only thing that would save her now, Carrie answered without hesitation, “I thought if you and Ms. Hamilton realized how much you have in common, you might love each other….and….” Carrie chewed some more on her bottom lip, “and then I would have a ma.” Tears began to fill her eyes and she broke eye contact with her father.
Adam felt his heart breaking in his chest and he cupped his daughter’s face in his hands. “I didn’t know you wanted a new ma, Carrie. You never said anything.”
Carrie continued to stare at her lap, “I didn’t know I wanted one either, Pa. Not ‘till I started thinking about my friends and how they all have ma’s and I don’t. I thought you might be happier if I had a ma again.” She plucked at the hem of her smock.
“Do I seem unhappy to you, Honey?” Adam asked his sniffling daughter.
Carrie considered the question a moment and replied, “No, Pa, I guess not.”
“Carrie,” Adam continued, “I loved your mama more than any woman in the whole world…except you. When your mama died, I was sad for a long time, and I still get sad sometimes. I miss your mother, just like you do. But I can still be happy because there is a part of her that lives on in you, and you were the greatest gift God could have ever given to me. As long as we’re together, I will always be happy and you don’t need to concern yourself with the matter, okay?” Adam forced her to look at him again. “I may find another woman one day, that I can love and marry, but that will never change the feelings I have towards your mama. Can you understand that?”
Carrie nodded and wrapped her arms around her papa’s neck. Adam went on, “And rest assured that my feelings for you will never change, no matter what.” Adam returned his little girl’s embrace, wrapping her in his strong arms and patted her back.
“From now on, Pa, I’ll leave the match-making up to you,” Carrie assured her father and nestled her face into his shoulder.
“The only match I care about right now, is the one between you and me,” Adam quipped and Carrie lifted her face off his shoulder to grin into her father’s face. Adam pinched her nose and said, “How about a game of checkers, hm? I might let you win.”
Carrie’s grin grew even wider and she jibed back, “Only if I let you,” and wiggled free of her father’s grasp in order to make a break for the door. She moved quickly, but not swiftly enough to escape a pop on the bottom from her pa’s strong hand.
“Just motivating you, Sweetheart,” Adam teased.
“I don’t need that kind of motivation, Pa” Carrie taunted back, and ran out the door and down the stairs to the waiting checkerboard.