LIFE’S LESSONS

by

Christy Gleason

“Eric Cartwright...please.”

Hoss licked his lips in a panic. “Please,” he repeated. “P-l-e-z-e,” he spelled slowly, his face scooched up in concentration. “Please.”

A thin, raven-haired boy in a seat halfway back in the classroom felt his heart drop, and his shoulders sagged in despair. He kept his head down, pretending to read his lesson, but actually staring through his long lashes up at his brother now quaking at the front of the class, knowing from the teacher’s expression he’d just failed the test. Adam Cartwright, himself a brilliant scholar, simply didn’t understand why Hoss couldn’t do better on something as elementary as spelling. It wasn’t like Hoss was stupid, Adam thought. But he just hated everything to do with books and reading.

“No, Eric,” Miss Wilson was saying. “That’s seven out of ten you’ve missed. I’m afraid I’ll have to fail you. You’re to stay in at recess and work on the words you misspelled.”

“Yes’m,” Hoss replied, staring at the floor.

Adam observed his younger brother with frustrated sorrow. Hoss was only seven but he towered over the others in his class. In fact, he was nearly as tall as Adam himself, though Adam was nearly six years older. His size made things hard on Hoss, Adam knew. Adults tended to expect too much from the boy, simply because he looked so much older than he was, and other children found him intimidating until they discovered his innate gentleness, and near-incapacity for anger.

The class filed back to their seats, and Adam watched as his brother plopped down heavily, clearly wishing he were anywhere but where he was. Adam loved to learn, and was delighted that he finally had the opportunity to attend formal schooling, but for Hoss it was a nightmare. Adam sighed, shook his head, and went back to his lesson.

When Miss Wilson called recess, all the students stood and filed out the door, except those that had failed in their lessons and were denied the opportunity to run and play with their classmates. And Adam Cartwright. Instead of leaving the room, he headed toward his brother and sat down beside him. He bent his head toward the younger boy and whispered to him. “You okay, Hoss?”

Hoss looked up at his older brother, tears swimming in his crystal-blue eyes. “I hate it here, Adam. Honest I do.”

“I know, Hoss. But Pa says you hafta go to school.”

Hoss’ bottom lip stuck out in a pout. “Don’t know why. You can read to me.”

“But what if I’m not around to read to you, Hoss? What if I go away somewhere?”

Panic showed on Hoss’ round, open face. “You ain’t leavin’ me, are ya, Adam? Promise you ain’t!”

“You know I wouldn’t leave you, Hoss. But what if I go on a trip somewhere? Like to San Francisco on a timber deal. You gotta know how to read.”

Hoss looked at his brother scornfully. “You ain’t gonna go on no timber deal. You ain’t even thirteen, yet.”

Adam resisted the urge to clip his brother across the head. He didn’t like being reminded that he was still only twelve years old. “Yeah, well, you gotta read, anyway. Come on, I’ll help you with your spelling.”

He began drilling Hoss on the words he’d missed, not noticing Miss Wilson watching the two brothers as they worked. She smiled to herself. The two were a study in opposites. Adam, thin, raven-haired, studious. Hoss, chubby, blond, destined never to be a scholar. Yet the two were inseparable. They were both charming children, and she was glad to have two such well-behaved students, but there was no denying that Adam was the easier to teach. He was extraordinarily bright and learned seemingly without effort. His penmanship was flawless, he read and wrote like a child far older than his age, and showed an innate understanding of physics and mathematics. Poor Hoss had to struggle with every lesson, and clearly hated learning. But his open, affable, fun-loving nature made him popular with his fellow students, and he was accepted in many ways far easier than his shy, reticent brother. She smiled to herself, knowing that Adam would find a way to drill the lesson into his younger brother’s head, if anyone could.

At the end of the day the class of youngsters made a mad dash for the outdoors. Most of the students lived in the newly-founded town of Virginia City or on small farms nearby, and they had time to play before heading home to their chores. The Cartwright boys had a much longer ride ahead of them, and Adam bustled about buttoning Hoss into a heavy coat for the long ride home, and handing him the last of their lunch as a snack to hold him until they arrived at the ranch house. Miss Wilson finished tidying the schoolhouse for the evening, then walked over to the brothers.

“Be careful riding home,” she told them, as she did every afternoon. “And Hoss,” she reverted to the boy’s nickname rather than the formal “Eric” after school hours, “make sure you stay near your brother. You have a long ride.”

“Yes’m,” Hoss replied, looking at the floor, too embarrassed to meet the teacher’s eyes. “I’ll do better next week, Miss Wilson. I promise.”

“I’m sure you will, Hoss,” Miss Wilson smiled.

“I expect Pa’ll tan me when he finds out I failed spelling again,” Hoss added, mournfully.

Miss Wilson tousled the youngster’s hair, suspecting he was probably right. Ben Cartwright expected a lot from his children.

Adam watched the exchange with narrowed eyes. He loved Hoss more than anything else in the world, and hated seeing him so miserable.

“You know, Miss Wilson,” he said brightly, presenting her with his most charming smile, “Hoss didn’t have a lot of time to study last night. Did you know that his cat, Belle, had six kittens and then up and croaked? Kittens couldn’t even lap milk. Had to be fed with a spoon.”

Miss Wilson looked at Adam then back to Hoss in amazement. “Is that true, Hoss?”

Hoss stared at his brother whose raven locks were bobbing vigorously as Adam nodded encouragingly. “Well,” he said dubiously, “Belle done snuffed it, all right. Had six kittens then got kicked in the head by our mule, Dudley.” Hoss didn’t mention that this had occurred three months previous, and the six kittens were now lapping milk on their own just fine.

“Hoss,” Miss Wilson said. “I had no idea you were so good with animals.”

“Oh, he’s a natural with animals, ma’am,” Adam told her, white teeth flashing, cheeks dimpling. “He can just about fix anything that’s wrong with them. Never met an animal that didn’t trust him, right off. ‘Course it makes it hard on him, ‘cause when they’re hurt or need help, lots of animals won’t let people near ‘em. Leaves it to Hoss to do lots of the work, ‘cause they like him.”

“I suppose that does take a lot of time, feeding six kittens,” Miss Wilson said, smiling at Hoss.

Hoss stared resolutely at the floor, and remained speechless.

Adam stepped smoothly into the silence, his smile widening. “Oh, he never complains. Just loves animals. But it can make it hard for him to get all his studying done.”

Miss Wilson knew she was being manipulated by the older Cartwright boy. But there was no denying Adam was a charmer, and if Hoss had to spend time feeding six kittens in addition to his other chores, it wasn’t really surprising that he hadn’t gotten his spelling homework completed. She thought about what she considered Ben Cartwright’s unreasonably high standards, and felt herself giving in.

“Well, Hoss, under the circumstances, maybe you just needed a little extra study time. I tell you what. If you can spell the words to me now, I’ll change your grade.”

Hoss looked up at Adam, his mouth hanging open. Adam smiled encouragingly. “I’m sure he can, Miss Wilson,” he told her. “He tried really hard during recess. And, of course, there weren’t any animals bothering him, so he could really concentrate.”

Hoss closed his eyes, wishing his brother would shut up. Pa’s gonna be so mad when he finds out about this, he thought. It never occurred to him that his father wouldn’t find out. Pa always knew everything.

Slowly, carefully he recited every word, remembering the way Adam had spelled them over and over, while he repeated them. He opened one eye and looked up at his teacher. She was smiling proudly, and he felt a little sick.

“Very good, Hoss! That was perfect. I can’t give you a hundred, since it took you two tries to do it, but your father ought to be pleased with a 95, don’t you think?”

Hoss covered his eyes with the heels of his palms, then felt Adam steering him down the aisle towards the door.

“Pa’ll be real proud of him, Miss Wilson,” Hoss heard his brother saying. He could hear the familiar tone in Adam’s voice and knew that he had that smile on his face that always made ladies start fussing over him. “Thank you, ma’am. We’d better go. We got chores to do. See you Monday!”

“Good-bye, Boys,” Miss Wilson answered. “Have a nice weekend!”

Then Hoss felt the chilly air on his face as Adam opened the door and shoved him out into the cold. He heard the schoolroom door slam behind him before he uncovered his eyes.

“Adam...” he started.

“Not here,” Adam hissed at him, pulling him toward the stable where they left their horses.

Hoss waited while Adam saddled the horses, then clambered onto his horse’s back from atop a nearby bale of hay. He refused to look at his brother, but followed him out into the afternoon sun. The two rode several miles in silence before Adam spoke to him.

“Okay, Hoss. What’s the matter?”

Hoss pulled on the reins, signaling his ancient horse to stop. He glared at Adam. “You lied to Miss Wilson!”

“Did not.”

“Did so!”

“Did not!”

“Did so!”

“Hoss,” Adam said in the soothing tone usually reserved for the emotionally unstable, “I told her you didn’t have much time to study yesterday. That was true.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t have much time to study ‘cause we went fishin’ without Pa givin’ us permission.”

“So? She doesn’t know that.”

“You told her it was ‘cause I had to feed the kitties.”

“Hoss, I never said that. I said you didn’t have much time to study. Then I just happened to mention about your cat. I never said that was the reason you didn’t study.”

Hoss glowered at him. “Them kitties ain’t gotta be hand-fed no more.”

“Never said they did.”

“Did too.”

“Did not.”

“Did too,” Hoss insisted.

“Look, Hoss,” Adam explained patiently. “Just ‘cause I happen to mention two unrelated facts in the same breath doesn’t mean I’m saying they have anything to do with one another. If people assume they do, well, they shouldn’t go around making assumptions.”

Hoss glared at him. “You know what Pa’ll say when he finds out. He’ll say that’s a lie by...a lie by...emission.”

“Omission,” Adam corrected him, unconsciously rubbing the seat of his trousers as he remembered the tannings he’d received for exactly this type of behavior. He and his father definitely did not see eye-to-eye on the subject. Adam saw no reason why he should be punished for other people’s imprecise reasoning skills. For himself, he always listened very carefully to what people said, and questioned them scrupulously before coming to conclusions. It wasn’t his fault other people neglected to do the same. Of course, Pa hated it when he cross-examined people. Although it made his stepmother laugh and sometimes refer to him as the Ponderosa in-house Legal Counsel, it just made Pa mad. Pa said it was disrespectful. Adam preferred to think of it as being thorough.

“Anyway,” he went on, “how’s Pa gonna find out? You gonna tell him?”

“N-o-o-o-o,” Hoss said slowly. “But what if he asks me straight out about my spelling test?”

“You tell him you made a 95,” Adam said exasperated. “You heard Miss Wilson.”

“But what if...”

“Hoss! You made a 95. Just say so. There’s no reason to bring up the more painful details.” He saw Hoss’ face become even more like a thundercloud, and quickly cut him off. “Ain’t Pa always sayin’ that children should be seen and not heard?”

“Well...yeah...”

“Then there’s no reason to elaborate. Pa’s a busy man. He ain’t got time to listen to lots of irrelevant facts.”

“What’s ir-revelant?”

“It means, just stick to the main subject, then shut up. Come on; let’s get home. We got chores.”

When the two made it home, Adam sent Hoss into the house for a snack and busied himself unsaddling and currying the horses. Then he walked to the woodpile and chose some logs to split for firewood. He watched as two fat, sleek, three-month-old kittens scurried away from behind the pile and grinned, feeling very pleased with himself. Thinking on your feet, he mused. Very useful skill. He whistled happily as he began to chop wood, and was so preoccupied that he failed to hear the ringing of horsehooves as his father rode into the yard.

Ben’s eyes narrowed as he watched his oldest son swinging the axe, apparently without a care in the world. He dismounted and tied his horse to the hitching post before ambling over to his son. He stood off to the side a moment, then opened his mouth.

“Adam!” he barked.

Adam was so startled that he hit the log with a glancing blow and the axe skittered, twisting his wrist and nearly escaping his grasp.

“Ouch!”

He turned and looked at his father in amazement. Pa knew better than to yell at someone with an axe in his hand.

“What’d ya do that for?” he asked, rubbing his aching wrist.

“Get in the house. Now!”

Adam gulped, dropped the axe, and silently headed to the house, forcing himself not to shield his rear end with his hands. He walked in and scurried behind a chair, hoping to keep some distance between himself and his father.

“Hello, Adam.”

Adam glanced to his right and saw Hoss, Marie, and baby Joe sitting around the table. Hoss appeared to have nearly polished off a large snack of cookies and milk and Marie seemed to be unsuccessfully trying to get one-year-old Little Joe to eat something that looked suspiciously like mashed peas.

“Good afternoon, ma’am.” Adam smiled nervously at his stepmother before turning his attention back to his father who had closed the door quietly behind him and was unbuckling his gunbelt, his dark eyes blazing at Adam with undisguised anger. Adam felt his stomach slowly settle into his feet.

“Hoss,” Ben barked. “Get over here.”

Hoss froze, his teeth still sunk into his last cookie and his wide eyes looking to his older brother for reassurance. He found none.

Hoss shoved the last of the cookie into his mouth and dragged himself into the great room.

“H-hi, Pa,” he said in a small voice. His courage failed him then, and he ran over to Adam and hid behind him, unconsciously mimicking Adam’s frightened response.

“Get over here you two.”

Adam took a deep breath and stepped out from behind the chair and moved a scant few steps towards his father. Hoss scurried behind his brother, though Adam’s slim frame was not enough to hide his greater bulk.

“Hoss!”

Hoss peeked out from behind his brother. “Y-yessir?”

“I understand you had a spelling test today.”

Hoss gulped. “Yessir.”

“What did you make on it?”

Hoss’ mouth dropped open and he stared up at Adam.

“He made a 95, Pa,” Adam said brightly. “Ain’t you proud of him?”

Ben’s eyes blazed at his eldest. “I don’t believe I was addressing you, young man,” he snapped. “Hoss?”

“I...I...I...”

“Hoss!”

Hoss looked at the floor. “Made a 95, Pa,” he said in a small voice.

“Yes. So I understand from your teacher.”

Adam and Hoss looked at one another in panic.

“Miss Wilson so proud of Hoss she sent you a note about it?” Adam asked hopefully.

Marie was watching the exchange in amazement. She had no idea what was going on, but one look at Adam’s face and she was beginning to suspect he’d been engaging in some of his conversational shenanigans again. She kept her face neutral, willing herself not to laugh. She would back her husband, no matter what, but privately thought many of Adam’s statements were actually quite clever, if somewhat underhanded.

“No, Adam. As a matter of fact I had to go to town unexpectedly. So I decided to stop by the schoolhouse so that I could ride home with you. You’d already left, but it gave me a chance to talk to Miss Wilson.” His eyes moved from Adam to Hoss. “Miss Wilson was quite impressed to hear about your talent with animals, Hoss. She told me that she’d never heard of a seven-year-old taking full responsibility for hand-feeding six orphaned kittens before.”

He broke off, and neither boy made a move, barely daring to breathe. The silence stretched interminably. Finally Hoss cleared his throat. Swiftly, Adam kicked him.

Ben’s eyes immediately returned to Adam. “Adam.”

“Yessir?”

“Adam, did you tell Miss Wilson that Hoss did not have time to study his spelling last night because he had to hand-feed six kittens in addition to his other chores?”

Adam raised his chin. “No sir.”

“Adam!”

“Yessir?”

“I’ll ask you just once more. Did you, or did you not, tell Miss Wilson that Hoss did not have time to study his spelling last night because he had to hand-feed six kittens in addition to his other chores?”

Adam steeled himself, and looked his father directly in the eye. “I did not.”

“I see. Then it will no doubt come as a surprise that Miss Wilson told me that is exactly what you told her.”

“No sir.”

“No sir? No sir, what?”

“No sir, it does not come as a surprise to me.”

“And yet you deny saying it.”

“I do,” Adam said, attempting a dignity he didn’t come close to feeling.

“Explain.”

“I told Miss Wilson that Hoss did not have time to study his spelling last night.”

“And did you explain to her that it was because the two of you snuck off to go fishing?”

“No sir.”

“Then what explanation did you give her?”

“I do not recall an explanation coming up.”

“You do not recall an explanation coming up.”

“No sir.”

“Then how did Miss Wilson find out about the kittens?”

“I mentioned them.”

“You mentioned them.”

“Yessir.”

“You admit you told her, yet you deny explaining away Hoss’ abysmal spelling performance on the kittens.”

“Yessir.”

Ben was by now so red in the face that, despite the situation, Adam was becoming somewhat alarmed.

“Pa,” he asked anxiously, “you sufferin’ from apoplexy?”

“With a son like you, I wouldn’t be a bit surprised.”

Adam huffed and lapsed into a wounded silence.

“Tell me precisely what you told Miss Wilson.”

“I said, ‘Hoss didn’t have a lot of time to study last night.’ Then I said, ‘Did you know that his cat, Belle, had six kittens and then up and croaked? Kittens couldn’t even lap milk. Had to be fed with a spoon,’” Adam rattled off, as always his near-eidetic memory serving him well.

Marie immediately turned her attention back to the baby, to hide her smile. She’d known it would be something like this.

Ben rubbed his forehead. “So your story is that Miss Wilson just assumed that all your statements were connected, and she therefore thought you told her something that you did not.”

“Yessir.”

“What have I told you that is called?”

“Lying by omission.”

“Correct. And what does that mean?”

“That I didn’t mention the real reason for Hoss’ lack of study time.”

“Correct again. So perhaps you would like to explain why you left out such a pertinent piece of information.”

Adam hesitated. It was one thing to avoid mentioning something to get his brother out of trouble. It was quite another to do so to save himself.

“I was deliberately trying to mislead her,” he admitted honestly.

“Well, congratulations. You will no doubt be delighted to discover that you were entirely successful. Which will doubtless make it that much more interesting when you explain the truth of the situation to her on Monday morning.”

Adam blanched at the thought. “Nothing I said was a lie,” he argued, despite knowing it was unwise to cross his father when he was in one of his moods.

Ben’s eyes narrowed. “You deliberately mislead her. That is a lie.”

“You know, Pa,” Adam said conversationally, “The other day I was reading all about the Trojan War, and it seems that the Greeks made this giant wood horse and left it outside the city of Troy, then pretended to leave. Only they hadn’t, ‘cause they were hiding inside the...”

“I know all about the Trojan War, young man. I fail to see the significance.”

“Well, it wasn’t the Greeks’ fault that the Trojans jumped to conclusions. They never actually said the horse wasn’t just a friendly peace offering. The Trojans just assumed that they...”

“Adam!” Ben roared.

“I’m just sayin’...”

“Adam. Go outside and wait for me in the barn.”

Adam sighed and headed for the front door, taking care to stay out of the reach of his father’s long arms. He’d just opened the door when he heard his father speaking to his brother.

“Now, Eric...”

Adam turned sharply at his father’s use of Hoss’ real name, knowing it did not bode well, and saw his little brother quaking in fear. As always when his brother was in danger, Adam forgot everything but protecting him.

“It wasn’t his fault,” he cried out. “I was the one who did all the talkin’. You can’t blame Hoss for...”

“Adam! What did I just tell you?”

“But Pa, Hoss didn’t...”

“ADAM!”

“You can’t give him a tanning for somethin’ he didn’t do!” Adam shouted. Then he froze in abject fear as his father turned slowly toward him, his eyes glittering dangerously. Adam gulped.

“It is not your place to tell me what I can and cannot do, Boy. Now go out to the barn and wait for me there,” Ben said, clearly enunciating each syllable. “And I do not wish to hear one more word out of your mouth.”

Adam sent one last despairing look at his little brother and left the house heading to the barn to await the fate he knew was coming.

When the door closed behind the boy, Ben closed his eyes and breathed heavily, counting to ten before turning back to Hoss. He saw the boy’s pale face, tears dancing in his eyes, and reminded himself that Hoss was only seven years old, and was highly influenced by his adored, and badly-behaved, older brother.

“Hoss, what you did today was very wrong. Do you understand that?”

Hoss nodded, too terrified to speak.

“I know that you didn’t lie, Adam did, but aiding and abetting a lie is just as bad. Do you see that?”

Hoss had no idea what aiding and abetting was, but he was clearly supposed to agree, so he nodded vigorously.

Ben nodded then walked toward him. Hoss flinched, but his father just passed him by and picked up a book off the mantle. He moved back to his son.

Hoss stared at the book. Was Pa going to spank him with it? He wondered whether it would hurt as much his pa’s belt. Well, it can’t hurt worse, he told himself philosophically, and squeezed his eyes shut, bending over in preparation.

“Hoss,” he heard his father saying.

He opened one eye warily, and saw his father holding the book out to him. The sight caused him to open both eyes wide in surprise and straighten up. He looked at the McGuffy’s Reader his father was proffering, but made no move to take it.

“I think you need to spend a bit more time reading. So you are going to read this book from cover to cover, and until you are done you will not leave the house except for school and chores. Have I made myself clear?”

Hoss looked at the book in horror. It wasn’t as fat as those dumb ol’ books Adam always had his nose it, but it had to be at least fifty pages. Maybe even a hundred! He’d be ten or maybe twelve by the time he made it through all that. He’d be OLD!

“But Pa...!”

“No buts. You’ll start tonight after supper, and when you’re finished, you will come tell me, and I will give you a test to see how well you’ve read it.”

Hoss thought longingly of Adam awaiting his punishment in the barn. “Pa, can’t you just give me a hidin’ instead?”

Ben kept a stern look on his face despite his desire to laugh. “I think this will be more of an object lesson.”

Hoss scowled. He didn’t know what an object lesson was, but already knew he didn’t like them. He took the book gingerly with two fingers, and unceremoniously dropped it on the coffee table, his face scrunched up as though the book emitted some foul odor.

Ben bit his lip to keep from laughing. “Now, it’s time for chores. Supper will be ready soon. Go out and sweep the front porch, then wash up and set the table.”

“Yessir.” Hoss walked to the front door, throwing a baleful look over his shoulder at the book he was now saddled with, and walked out, closing the door behind him.

Ben rubbed his forehead and began to walk to the door to find Adam.

“Ben.”

He turned to Marie, and was startled to see an amused smile crossing her face.

“Don’t tell me you think this is funny!”

“Ben, they’re just children.”

“They’re old enough to know better. Especially Adam. His behavior is inexcusable. He’s getting worse about this as he gets older, not better.”

“Well, you have to admit, he didn’t actually tell a lie.”

“Marie, what he did was just the same as lying. You know that.”

“Well, lawyers do that sort of thing every day. Maybe he’ll grow up to be a famous attorney.”

“God forbid.”

Marie laughed. “I’m not saying what he did was right. But you’ve got to admit it shows a certain ingenuity. He’s very bright.”

“I know. The boys have only been in school for two months, and already Miss Wilson has begun talking about getting Adam ready for furthering his education. Going to college.” Ben snorted. “As though any son of mine is going to waste four years of his life with his feet propped up, reading books. Adam does too much of that, already.”

“Ben, you can’t keep Adam here on the Ponderosa forever.”

“Oh no? Watch me.”

“Ben, Adam is extremely gifted. He’s going to want to expand his horizons one day. Trying to keep him in line by whipping him is only going to make him more determined to leave, and sooner than he’s ready, sooner than he possibly survive alone. You might try reasoning with him.”

Ben scowled. “I can’t reason with him. He’s smarter than me.”

Marie hid a smile, knowing how much it cost her husband to admit that.

“Not only is he smarter than me,” Ben added darkly, “he’s beginning to recognize that fact.”

That was one of the things that truly galled Ben about sending his son to school. He had had indications of Adam’s extraordinary brightness over the years, but Adam had never had any understanding that he was any different than anyone else. Now that he was in school, and comparing himself with other children, it was beginning to dawn on him how much differently his mind worked. Ben had begun to notice a certain smugness overtaking his first born, and did not care for it one bit.

“He’s got to learn that this sort of behavior is unacceptable.”

“He only does it to protect Hoss. You know how Adam feels about him. And he’s already showing the same sense of protectiveness towards the baby.” Marie ran her hand over Little Joe’s head, combing through the soft, brown curls. “I, for one, think brotherly love like that is an asset.”

Ben shook his head. “Brotherly love is one thing, but lying is quite another, and if I have to take off my belt to prove it to him, well, that’s only because he’s too stubborn to learn it on his own.”

“I wonder where he gets that?” Marie teased.

Ben smiled sheepishly. “I like to think he gets it from his mother.”

“Mm-hmm. Well, just remember that in the twelve years of his life, he’s survived more pain and tragedy than most people twice his age. He might still be young, but in some ways he’s been an adult for a long time. It’s only natural he’ll resent being treated like a child.”

Ben squirmed uncomfortably at the implication. He knew Adam had had a hard life. “I know Adam hasn’t exactly had the kind of upbringing most children get. But I’m still his father. He’s still my son, and I’m responsible for teaching him right from wrong.”

Marie sighed, and stood up, carrying her sleeping infant over to the small crib near the fire that Adam had hand-carved for the baby. He’d begun making it the day he found out he was going to have another sibling, and it had taken him months. The workmanship was beautiful, and Marie had been truly astonished and touched at the gift. She laid Little Joe down and watched her sleeping angel for a long moment, thinking about how her son would be growing into a man over the years. Of course, with two loving parents, and two adoring older brothers to watch over him and raise him right, Marie had no doubt that he would always remain just as sweet and innocent as he was at that moment. He was clearly a child that was never going to give anyone a moment’s worry. She stroked his hair once more before heading toward the kitchen to help Hop Sing finish making supper.

“Just don’t be too hard on him, Ben,” she added as she left the room. “He’s a sensitive boy. More sensitive than I think you know.”

When Ben walked back into the house, Hoss stared up at him in fear, wondering where his older brother was. Usually after a tanning, Adam accompanied Pa back to the house, though he generally refused to look at the older man. This time Adam was nowhere to be seen.

Pa couldn’t’a kilt Adam, Hoss reassured himself. Then he thought of his own dire punishment and realized just how mad Pa really was. Maybe Adam really was lying dead in the barn.

Hoss set the table slowly, keeping an anxious eye on the door, and was profoundly relieved when he finally heard the click of the latch, and saw Adam walking stiffly into the house. Adam was pale, and Hoss knew Pa had really walloped him. He wanted to run over to give his big brother a hug, but didn’t dare do it with Pa and Ma sitting at their places ready for supper.

Hoss gathered his courage, and spoke, instead. “Come on to the table, Adam. We’re havin’ roast pork.”

Ben cleared his throat. “Your brother will not be joining us this evening, Hoss. Adam, go to your room.”

“Yessir.”

Adam headed for the stairs, but heard Hoss break into uncontrollable sobs. Getting a whipping was bad enough, but having to skip a meal—Hoss couldn’t imagine a more dreadful punishment. Even having to read a book was better than that!

Adam turned back to his brother. He didn’t care a bit about missing a meal. It saved him from having to spend the evening sitting on his sore bottom, avoiding his father’s almost palpable glares. Besides, it would give him time to start that new book about steam engines he’d finally managed to save up for. He reassured his brother with an almost imperceptible wink, then turned back to mount the stairs.

But Adam was not as subtle as he thought himself to be. His father had intercepted the exchange between the brothers, and frowned, realizing that Adam was not quite as cowed as he’d believed him to be. Which meant he hadn’t received the extent of punishment Ben had believed he’d handed out.

“But before you go, Adam...” he added in sudden inspiration.

Adam turned to his father, a polite smile pasted on his face. “Yessir?”

“...You will go to the barn, retrieve a couple crates and gather up all your books from your room and bring them downstairs.”

This announcement shook Adam to the core, and he abandoned his resolve to be properly polite, yet distant, to his father.

“What?” he yelped.

“You heard me,” Ben replied evenly. “Every last book.”

“But...but...”

Ben raised an eyebrow, and Adam’s mouth snapped shut. He turned and left the house, returning with two wooden crates. He climbed the stairs with all the melodrama of a convicted criminal heading to the guillotine, and returned a short time later staggering under the weight of his many books. Even Ben, who was well aware of Adam’s near-devotion to reading, was surprised at the size of the library his son had managed to acquire.

“Take them to the storehouse,” he ordered.

Adam’s lips narrowed into a thin line, but he did as he was told. When he returned he stood facing his father.

“Is that all of them?” Ben asked.

“Yes.” There was the barest trace of defiance in the boy’s tone, but Ben chose to ignore it.

“Very well. Then you may go to your room,” he dismissed the boy.

Adam didn’t stir. “When do I get them back?” he demanded.

Ben’s eyes remained on his supper. “If you’re lucky, perhaps by Christmas.”

Adam’s eyebrows shot up, and his mouth dropped open in shock. “But that’s almost two months away!”

Ben put his fork down and looked deliberately at his recalcitrant son.

“I am aware of that. I said you might get them back by Christmas. But given your present behavior, my guess is that you won’t be getting your books back until your birthday.”

Adam balled his fists in fury. His birthday was in May! Thinking of a long, bleak winter without any books to read, and glowering darkly, he turned away, breathing heavily. He climbed the stairs, his feet landing heavier on the steps than absolutely necessary, but not quite loud enough for his father to accuse him of stomping. He entered his room, and slammed the door noisily behind him.

*******

When Adam came in from doing his chores the next morning, he found his father, stepmother and baby brother all sitting around the table awaiting his and Hoss’ arrival to begin breakfast.

Adam’s face lit up.

“Good morning, Marie,” he said brightly, receiving a pleasant greeting in return. Then he walked over to the baby and swung him up out of his high chair and into his arms, giving him a big hug and a kiss. “Good morning, Little Joe!” he sang out. The baby’s arms curled around his big brother’s neck, and he laughed with delight at the attention.

Adam put the baby back down and slid into his customary spot, sitting carefully and steeling himself not to flinch as his welted and bruised backside connected with the hard, wood chair. He ignored his father entirely.

“Good morning, Adam,” Ben said dryly.

Adam kept his eyes riveted on is plate. “Sir.”

Marie tried to smooth over the situation. “I trust you slept well.”

“I did not. Thank you for asking,” Adam replied with almost aristocratic dignity.

Marie bit her lip to keep from smiling. “Where’s your brother? We’re waiting breakfast on him.”

“I don’t know.”

“Didn’t you get him up to help with morning chores?” Ben asked sharply.

“No Sir, I did not.”

“And why not?”

“I thought perhaps he stayed up too late reading. I’ve done that myself on occasion.” For the first time that morning Adam looked squarely his father. “Of course,” he added with his most beatific smile, “that was back when I used to have books.”

Ben felt his head begin to pound. “Go and get him now.”

“Yessir.”

Adam rose from the table and disappeared up the stairs. Ben and Marie exchanged a look.

“I know one should never say ‘I told you so’ but I told you so.”

“That boy is going to learn proper manners if I have to beat them into him day after day,” Ben said grimly.

“Ben, he’s just resenting you right now, and blowing off a little steam. Taking his books away was a very harsh punishment.”

“His punishment is his own fault. He has no right to feel resentful.”

Marie sighed. “I know that, but...”

She broke off as Hop Sing suddenly ran in from the kitchen.

“Mr Cartlight! Mr Cartlight!”

“What is it, Hop Sing?” Ben growled, in no mood for further problems.

“Mr Cartlight, quick. Men outside house with guns!”

“Oh, for Heaven’s sake,” Ben muttered under his breath, rising and heading to the door. “Why can’t I ever have a peaceful life?”

Just as he reached the door it swung open, and two men, wearing gun belts and armed with rifles, burst in the door. Ben’s hands immediately shot into the air, while he glanced at the nearby credenza where he kept his gun belt. It was out of reach.

“Move back, Mister,” one of the men told him.

Ben obligingly retreated while the men moved forward. As they came into her view, Marie gave a short scream, scooping her child up into her arms to protect him.

“Sorry to frighten you, ma’am,” the same man told her.

“W-what do you want?” she asked breathlessly. She held the baby so tightly to her that he suddenly began to wail at the top of his lungs.

At the unexpected squalling the other man jumped abruptly and his rifle shot off accidentally. The spokesman looked at him in disgust.

“Earl,” he said, clearly annoyed. “Haven’t I talked to you about that trigger finger of yours?”

Earl looked abashed. “Sorry, but I ask you, have you ever heard a noise like that in your life?” he asked, pointing at Little Joe. He shook his head in revulsion.

There was the sudden sound of running feet in the hall upstairs, and Adam and Hoss appeared around the corner. They started down the steps and stopped in alarm at the sight that met them.

The leader looked at Ben and motioned to the children. “Who’re they?”

Ben glowered, not pleased at answering questions to someone who was in his home uninvited, and holding his family at gunpoint. “My other two boys.”

“Anyone else in the house?”

“No.”

The man sized the two boys up. “You two. Get down here.”

Adam descended the stairs slowly, Hoss sticking closely behind him.

“Who shot a gun in the house?” Adam asked furiously.

Earl scratched his head, embarrassed. “Guess that would be me.”

Adam glared at him. He had spent long, exhausting months with his father building this house, barely finishing it in time for Little Joe’s birth, and he was extremely protective of it.

“Didn’t anyone ever teach you not to shoot a gun in the house?” he demanded. “Do you know how much work it took to design and build this place? What’s wrong with you? Maybe if you’d done the work, you’d be a little more careful!”

“Well, what did you expect? That kid was yelling its head off!”

“And you thought you’d quiet him down by shooting a gun?” Adam almost yelled in disbelief. “How can anyone be that stupid? Haven’t you ever been around a baby before?”

“Adam!” Ben shouted, terrified the men would shoot the outspoken child.

Adam scowled. He knew what he’d said was rude, and the tone of voice he’d used was what Pa always referred to as “taking up his elders” and therefore assumed his father was angry with him again. He looked at the floor, fighting a battle with himself. “Sorry, Mister,” he finally muttered.

The leader of the two had been watching the exchange in frank amazement.

“What’s your name, Kid?” he asked.

Adam’s head shot up. He hated being called a kid. “Adam Cartwright. What’s yours?”

The man laughed. “I’m Chuck Rogers, and you’ve already met Earl, there.”

Adam looked at the armed men and cocked his head. “What’d you want with us?”

“You seem like a bright enough kid. Can’t you figure out what we want?”

“Well, I suppose most people are looking for money when they break into other people’s homes,” Adam reasoned. “But I don’t know why you’d think we had any.”

Chuck grinned at him. “Pretty big spread you got here. Pretty big house.”

Adam stood taller with pride. “Yep. Pa and me just built this house last year.” He glanced over at this younger brother. “And Hoss helped, too,” he added.

Marie called frantically to them then. “Adam! Hoss! Come over here right now!”

The boys obediently walked over to her. She attempted to push them behind her to protect them, and while seven-year-old Hoss complied, twelve-year-old Adam did not. He stood next to her with his arms crossed glowering at the invaders and Chuck suddenly laughed as he looked from the boy to his father, noting their identical expressions.

“You sure do take after your pa, Kid,” he chuckled.

This statement did nothing to improve Adam’s mood. Generally he was proud when people told him he was like his father, but today the news was far from welcome.

“I do not!” Adam declared vehemently.

Ben glared at his son. “Adam, for once in your life, keep your mouth shut!”

Adam’s lower lip began to protrude in a hint of a pout, but he said no more.

Chuck watched the exchange with increasing amusement.

“Not to fond of your pa, are you, Kid?”

Hoss peeked out from behind his stepmother. “Pa gave Adam a hidin’ yesterday,” he volunteered cheerfully.

Both men laughed this time, and Adam and Ben whirled around and glared furiously at Hoss. Hoss ducked back behind Marie.

Chuck’s eyes twinkled at Adam. “What’d he tan you for?”

Adam looked directly at his father, definitely pouting now. “Improvisational ingenuity.”

“What’s that mean?” Earl asked with great interest.

Adam’s eyes dropped to the floor. “Pa calls it lyin’,” he muttered.

At this Chuck threw his head back and laughed heartily. “I like you, Kid,” he told Adam warmly. “I really do.”

Adam gazed up at the tall man. He approached Ben in height, but in coloring he resembled Hoss. Blond hair peeked out from under his hat, and the eyes that twinkled merrily were the color of a clear summer day. Adam felt himself warming to the man, despite the gun he held. He found he didn’t even mind Chuck calling him “Kid.” He walked over, approaching the men with only mild trepidation.

“So what you want with us, anyway?” he asked again.

“Well, Earl and me, we need us a change of horses, and I don’t suppose some fast cash wouldn’t hurt, neither.”

“Why? You runnin’ from someone?”

“Yep. Sheriff over in Carson City. Leastwise, as far as we know he’s still chasin’ us.”

“Why? What’d you do?”

Chuck scratched his head, considering the boy. “Well, Kid, I tell you. The folks in that town don’t much cotton to strangers winning at games of chance.”

“You cheated at poker,” Adam translated shrewdly.

Earl and Chuck both grinned at him.

“This one do got a brain on him, Chuck,” Earl commented.

But Ben had had enough of his son interacting with armed gunmen. “Adam,” he barked harshly. “Stop talking to them, and get behind your mother.”

Adam scowled. He’d been enjoying the men’s company, and, of course, Pa had to go and spoil it.

Chuck cocked an eye at Ben, then looked back to Adam. “He always talk to you like that?”

Adam opened his mouth to say yes, but realized that wasn’t actually true. “No,” he admitted grudgingly. “Only when he’s mad.” Then he considered a moment. “‘Course he’s mad a lot,” he added.

“Adam!” Ben roared, his face reddening both from anger and embarrassment.

“See?”

“Yeah,” Chuck responded shaking his head. “You got my sympathy, Kid. I had me a pa like that once.”

“Really?” Adam asked, amazed. He couldn’t imagine someone else having a pa like his. “What happened to him?”

“He punished me once too often.”

“Then what?”

“Then I decided that I didn’t need me a pa like that no more, and took off.”

“How old were you?”

“Fifteen.”

Adam’s face fell. “I’m only twelve,” he admitted.

“Thinking about leaving home, are you, Kid?” Chuck asked conversationally. “Hey Earl. What’d ya think? Think we could take the Kid here with us?”

Earl grinned amiably and tousled the boy’s dark hair. “Don’t see why not. Kid’s got some smarts on him. Might be useful to have around.”

“You’re not taking my boy anywhere,” Ben said furiously. “Adam, I told you before. Get behind your mother. Now do what I say.”

Adam scowled and turned to obey, then thought again of his books stacked irreverently in the storehouse, and his temper got the best of him. He turned back to his father. “Or what?”

Ben stared at his son in total disbelief. Adam could be a handful on occasion, but outright mutiny had never been threatened before. He narrowed his eyes and spoke in cold, measured tones.

“Or you-know-what, young man. Apparently one trip to the barn was not enough for you.”

Earl shook his head. “Chuck’s right, Kid. Come on with us. Ain’t no trips to the barn on the trail.”

Adam thought a moment. “Would you let me read my books?”

“Sure, why not? Who’s stopping you?”

Adam scowled and indicated his father. “He is. He took ‘em all away.”

Earl scratched his head. “Never saw much use in books, myself, but if that’s what you want to do on your off-time, it really don’t make me no never mind. What about you, Chuck? You’re always readin’.”

“Sure, I like books. We can get you some. Now let’s see about them horses.”

Adam hesitated, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “Ain’t that stealin’?”

“Sure it is, Kid.”

“Stealin’ ain’t right.”

“Who says so?”

“Pa does.”

“Well, he stole your books,” Chuck pointed out.

Adam scratched his head thoughtfully. “Well, he didn’t actually steal ‘em. He just made me put ‘em in the storehouse and won’t give ‘em back.”

“So he took ‘em and is keeping ‘em. Ain’t that stealin’?”

Adam dug his toe into the rug nervously. He knew full well it wasn’t the same thing at all, but the idea of getting his books back nearly obliterated every other thought in his head.

“Adam Cartwright,” Ben growled. “You are not going anywhere, and if you don’t get away from those men this instant and stop talking nonsense, you will never get those books back, because I will personally burn every last one of them.”

Adam stared at his father in disbelief. Burn books? His books? His beautiful, beloved books that gave so much without ever asking anything in return? He attempted to get his mind to grasp the alien concept.

“You wouldn’t,” he gasped, almost daring his father.

“You should know by now I’ll do anything I think is necessary.”

“Ben!” Marie was horrified. Couldn’t he see that a threat like that was only going to make Adam more determined to leave? Ben’s words were putting his son at greater risk of falling in with outlaws. Adam’s life, so full of promise and potential, would be ruined.

“No, Marie,” Ben said. “The boy’s got to learn he can’t have things his own way all the time.

Adam was suddenly furious. He glared directly at his father, seeing him through a red haze. “Have things my own way? When do I ever have things my own way? I spent the first nine years of my life on the road, traveling all the time, no friends, no home, because you want to live in the middle of nowhere. Then when we finally stay in one place, put down some roots, and things are finally settled up enough that I can go to school like I’ve always wanted, you take my books away and threaten to burn them! I never let my schoolwork get in the way of my chores. I do as much as a hired hand would do, and more. And what thanks do I get from you? You telling me I read too much, that it’s a waste of time, and it’s gonna affect my mind! Miss Wilson told me that I could go to college, but I know you’d never let me, even if I earn the scholarships she told me about, and it doesn’t cost you anything. You don’t care about me at all! So I might as well leave. At least they won’t stop me from reading!” he shouted at his father.

He turned back to the outlaws. “If I was a hired hand he’d have to pay me. So I figure I’ve earned the price of a couple horses, especially if we leave your old ones in trade. I’ll go out to the barn and saddle some.”

He glared once more at his father, then marched determinedly past the men and out the door.

Ben stared open-mouthed at the door as it slammed shut behind Adam. Then, coming to his senses, he started after the boy. Chuck immediately pointed the gun at him.

“Sorry, Mister. I prefer not to use force. I consider myself a gentleman. But we need them horses.”

“I have to go after my son. You know as well as I do that he can’t leave with you. And I don’t appreciate your filling his head with nonsense.”

Chuck’s eyes that had been so warm and inviting when they gazed on Adam were now as hard and cold as flint.

“You know, Old Man, you really do remind me of my pa. And I suddenly remember why I left home.”

“Why? Because your pa tried to teach you some manners and sense?”

“No,” Chuck replied with cold dislike. “Because I could never please him, no matter what I did. I'd get perfect marks in school. Did he care? No, he just wanted to know if I’d watered the crops and fed the stock. I told him I wanted to study, go to college, be a doctor. He told me he was my father and had the legal right to keep me on the farm working for him until I was twenty-one and old enough not to entertain ideas above my station. He ruined all my dreams because he only cared about his own. I hear tell he died a month ago in a threshing accident, but as far as I was concerned he died six years ago when I couldn’t stand it any longer and left. I haven’t grieved a day for him.”

Ben was suddenly shocked. Was this how Adam perceived their relationship? “Look, you can have the horses and any money we’ve got around. It isn’t much, but you’re welcome to it. Just leave my son behind.”

“Sounds to me like the kid don’t want to stay.”

“He’s just angry. Look, Son, when you have children of your own you’ll understand. What your pa was doing...he was trying to build something for your future. Because he loved you.”

Chuck snorted. “If he’d loved me he’d have seen I wanted to be my own man, I wanted to be something besides a farmer, but he was determined I was going to live his dream, not my own. So now I ain’t livin’ either one.”

Ben glanced at Marie, remembering how she’d told him he couldn’t keep Adam on the Ponderosa forever. Did she know his son better than he did?

“Sir,” Marie spoke up politely. “Surely you don’t want for someone else the life you have for yourself. You can see that Adam’s life wouldn’t be improved by leaving with you. It’s only going to cause more problems.”

“Ma’am, I’m real sorry if I’ve unearthed some family troubles. But it seems to me that the kid’s father is the real cause of them. Looks to me like he’s the one driving your son from you, not me.”

“He’s doing what he thinks is best for his child.”

“From what the kid says, it sounds like he’s doing what’s best for himself, if you don’t mind my saying so, ma’am. Sounds to me like the kid has high aspirations, but his pa don’t see fit to help him realize them.”

“He definitely won’t realize those aspirations by taking up with outlaws.”

“Well, ma’am, the way I see it, the choice is really up to the kid.”

“He’s twelve. He’s not old enough to make decisions for himself!”

“Ma’am,” Earl piped up. “We really ain’t that bad. We’re just a couple of card sharks. This is the first time we’ve done any home invading, and it’s only ‘cause we’re being hunted. That sheriff over there, Coffee’s the name, he’s one tough nut. Don’t give up any too easy and we figure he just might be bullheaded enough to still be tailing us.”

Ben grunted. He knew Roy Coffee, and had been trying to recruit him to give up his job in Carson City and become the sheriff of Virginia City ever since the town had been officially founded. He knew the type of lawman Roy was, and knew he was unlikely to give up a search once he had made up his mind to bring someone to justice.

“I have no doubt Roy is still hunting you,” he told the men with genuine relish.

Earl glanced at Ben in annoyance, then turned back to Marie. “Normally we’re real likeable fellows, ma’am, I assure you. We really don’t do nothin’ bad.”

“Card sharking isn’t legal. I love my son dearly. I want the best for him. I want him to live an upstanding life, not spend it running from the law.”

The men were silent a moment, considering her words, and Ben suddenly realized to his surprise that the two were, deep down, decent men who’d made some extremely poor choices early in life.

Finally Chuck addressed Marie. “Ma’am, I think I speak from experience here. I don’t think that kid’s gonna stay here much longer feeling the way he does. If he leaves on his own, or with someone else who’s gonna take advantage of his youth, there’s a good chance he’s gonna end up in a real bad place. If he leaves with us, I promise you this. We’ll take care of him, best we can.”

“You can’t take care of him like his family can.”

“No ma’am, I don’t expect we can. But I honestly do like the kid. Maybe he just needs to stretch his wings a little. Might make him ready to come back home. If it does, I promise you, we’ll bring him home to you.”

Marie had tears in her eyes. Adam was not her natural child, but she loved him as though he were.

“Please don’t do this. We need him. Don’t you ever think about how your leaving affected your mother? I’m a mother, and I can tell you without a doubt, it broke her heart.”

Chuck flushed in embarrassment, but answered in an even voice. “Probably did, ma’am. She was a mighty fine lady. You remind me of her quite a bit, if you don’t mind my saying it. But the fact is, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t make my father love and respect me, and I just couldn’t live there anymore. Much as the kid no doubt loves you, ma’am, I gotta say, it looks like he’s chafing under the collar from too much of his daddy ridin’ his back day after day. I understand that feeling, ma’am, I surely do, and I gotta say, even though I missed my ma something fierce every day after I left, missing her didn’t hurt near as much as living with him.”

Marie burst into sobs then, and both men looked at their feet, clearly uncomfortable. They were relieved when the door swung open and Adam came back into the house. He looked directly at the men, ignoring his father completely.

“I curried your horses and put them in the stable. Then I saddled two others for you. Plus I got my horse. He’s not that fast, but I’m a good rider, and I promise I won’t slow you down.”

For the first time he noticed Marie crying and his face, until then determined and resolute, darkened angrily. He turned back to the outlaws. “What’d you do to my ma?” he demanded.

“Hey, Kid. We didn’t do nothin’, promise. We didn’t touch her.”

“Then why’s she cryin’?”

“Adam,” Marie sobbed, holding Joe in one arm, and stretching her other out to him. “Please don’t leave us. We couldn’t bear it.”

Hoss, who had understood only snatches of the conversation that had been whirling around him since Adam had left the house, suddenly heard what his stepmother had just said, and realized that Adam was going away with these strangers. He panicked.

“Adam!” he began to wail. “Adam, don’t leave me! You told me yesterday you wouldn’t leave me!”

“Adam, this family isn’t a family without every one of us in it,” Marie told him through choked weeping. “If you leave, then the family is broken apart. Don’t you see that?”

Adam felt a lump in his throat, so deeply needing to be loved, but so afraid that he would be rejected. His mother had died when he was born, so he’d never even known her. Hoss’ mother had died less than two years after he’d met her, and he’d loved her more deeply than he had, until then, realized was possible. He’d loved, and lost, and was almost incapable of putting himself in the position of being hurt again. But as much as he had resented Marie when she’d first come to the Ponderosa, he loved her now. And Hoss had been his pride and joy since the first time Adam had laid eyes on him. Little Joe was still a baby, but always so happy, so fun, that Adam couldn’t help but give his heart once again.

As a result of his early losses, Adam tended to be reticent. He kept his feelings locked deeply inside for fear of being hurt. But once he opened up enough to give his heart to someone, he gave it fully and completely with absolutely no holding back. He loved Hoss, he loved Joe, he loved Marie, and, angry as he was right now, he loved his father. But until that moment he had never truly understood that, as deeply as he loved them, they loved him just as deeply back. Not just for the work he did, not just for the unique abilities he possessed that helped the ranch run smoothly, but just for him, and him alone. He was a sensitive, empathetic child and the fact that others were hurting couldn’t help but move him. The fact that they were hurting because of him, devastated him. He ran over to his stepmother and cuddled up against her, putting one arm around her waist, the other clutching Hoss close.

“I’m sorry, Marie. I’m sorry. Please don’t cry!”

“Oh, Adam,” she sobbed, pulling his head down on her shoulder and stroking his hair. “Adam, how could you think of leaving when we love you so much?”

She glanced at the two men then, and suddenly pulled away from the boy, shoving the baby into his arms. She hurried to the safe, knelt, and unlocked it, pulling out the small wad of bills that lay inside. Then she walked over to the outlaws and held the money out to them.

“Take it. It’s yours. It’s not much, but it’s all we have. And the horses Adam saddled for you. They’re yours, too. You need to leave now before the sheriff catches you. Adam will be staying here where he belongs.”

Chuck looked at the proffered money and reached out, taking it tentatively from her hand. Then he looked at Adam. He saw the boy holding an infant, whose chubby arms clutched Adam’s neck tightly. He was flanked by his younger brother, who held onto Adam as though afraid to let him go, for fear he’d disappear. Chuck felt a sudden pang, and wondered whether his home life would have been different had he had siblings.

“Kid,” he said finally. “What do you want?”

Adam felt the heat of his brothers’ bodies next to him. He looked at his beautiful stepmother who loved him, though he hadn’t been born to her. Then, after a moment’s hesitation, he looked at his father.

Ben stood frozen, staring anxiously at his son. Please, Adam, he thought. Even if I haven’t made it enough of a priority to tell you, please understand how much I love you.

Adam stared at his father’s face for a long moment. He thought of the long, seemingly endless trip across the country to come here. For five long years it had just been the two of them, alone. The Cartwrights against the world, Pa would tell him as they snuggled up in the wagon to sleep at night. He remembered how Pa would work long hours to pay for medicine for him when he was sick, and how he always made sure Adam had something to eat, even if he, himself, went hungry. He remembered how the plan had always been to go to California, but Adam had seen Lake Tahoe and the towering pines that surrounded it, and had immediately fallen in love with the spot. He remembered telling his father that his heart and soul felt at home here, and how Pa had reacted when he’d said that. “Well son, if you feel at home here, I guess this is where we need to stay.” And they had. They’d started building their first cabin that very day.

Pa does love me, he realized. He’s shown me every day of my life. How could I possibly doubt that? How could I possibly leave him?

He looked back at Chuck. “I’ll stay here,” he said finally. “Cartwrights against the world.”

He smiled shyly at his father, then, who rushed to him, gathering him into his strong arms. Ben looked over Adam’s head at the two men. “Like my wife said, the money and horses are yours. It’s the least I can do after what you’ve taught me today. But you’d better go now. If I know Roy, he’s still after you.”

Chuck and Earl looked at one another and headed to the door. Suddenly Chuck turned back and looked at Marie, who had regrouped with the rest of the family.

“Ma’am, I think I just might head on home and visit my ma.”

Marie smiled through tears of joy. “I guarantee you, it’s the best gift you can give her.”

And then the two were gone.

The family stood holding one another for some long moments, reveling in the closeness. Then Ben disengaged himself and left the house. He came back lugging the crates of Adam’s books.

Adam’s eyes opened wide at the sight, and looked at his father hopefully.

Ben laid the crates at his son’s feet. “I guess if you’re going to college one day, you’ll need to learn as much as possible to get you ready,” he said gruffly.

Adam’s eyes lit up and he hugged his father tightly. “Thank you, Pa,” he whispered in his father’s ear. Then he pulled away and looked at the floor, his cheeks flushed pink.

“And Pa? I’ll tell Miss Wilson the truth on Monday, no matter how mad she gets.”

Ben grinned at his son, proud of the young man he was growing into. “I know you will, Son. I know you will.”

Suddenly a loud shouting in Cantonese startled them all. They turned and saw Hop Sing gesturing dramatically towards the breakfast table.

“Bleakfast ruined. Bad Cartlights. Bad waste! Hop Sing go back to China where people sensible and eat in morning.” He continued raving in Cantonese until Adam approached him, a broad grin on his face.

“You can’t leave, Hop Sing. Didn’t you hear Ma? She said our family isn’t a family without every one of us in it. If you leave, the family will be broken up.”

Hop Sing looked at Adam for a moment, then his wide, infectious smile lit up his face.

“Missy Cartlight smart lady. Hop Sing stay. Family sit down. Hop Sing make special family meal.”

The Cartwrights all grinned at one another and sat down around the family table, their bonds of love stronger now than they’d ever been.

This is my home, Adam thought to himself. Wherever I go, wherever life takes me, the Ponderosa will always be my home.

THE END

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