FOR THE LOVE OF ADAM
By:  Deborah S.
 
 
Adam was seated in the blue chair, a book in his hands, but not reading.  He 
thought about his father, and how he had acted earlier.  It was as if he 
wanted Adam to wait home alone.  Like he knew, that  something was going to 
happen.  Adam stared at the book, then closed it, not being able to 
concentrate on it.  Moments later,  he stood up, hearing a buggy 
approaching.
 
Adam walked outside, and saw an older woman, standing in the yard.  Adam 
looked around, but no buggy was in sight.  Adam wondered what all this was 
about.  He walked up to the woman.  The woman smiled at Adam.  Adam smiled 
back.  There was something about this woman.  Something kind, and familiar, 
but Adam had no idea why he felt that way.  The woman looked Adam up and 
down, from head to toe.  She smiled again, then asked, “Handsome man, are 
you by any chance, Adam Cartwright?”
 
“I’d be a darned fool ma‘am, if I were to say I wasn’t, after that line,” 
Adam replied.
 
“You don’t remember me, do you?” the woman asked.  Adam looked at her face 
again.  Again, she looked familiar, but he couldn’t place the face.  “No 
ma’am, I don’t remember you.  I’m so sorry.  Maybe if you could give me some 
kind of hint,”  he replied.
 
“If we could go inside, I will tell you a very long, and interesting story,” 
  the woman said, leading Adam towards the house.
 
Once inside, the woman sat in Ben’s leather chair.  Adam stood before her.  
“Would you care for something to drink?”  he asked.
 
“No,” she replied.  Adam sat in the blue chair, wondering what she was going 
to tell him.  He leaned forward in anticipation.
 
“This is how my story begins.  It begins a long time ago, on your third 
birthday.  Your father had told us about what happened the beginning of that 
day.  You and he were sleeping outside, as you usually did, on the hard, 
cold ground.
 
“I’m hungry Pa,” Adam said, as he laid down on his blanket.  Ben Cartwright 
looked at his small son, saddened.  “I know you are son, but like I said, 
things will get better real soon, you’ll see. Soon I’ll get a job, and we’ll 
have enough money for food, and a place to sleep,” Ben replied.
 
“But I’m hungry now Pa,”  Adam replied.
 
“Adam, please just go back to sleep son. I have one more ranch to apply for 
work today, and if they hire me, things will get better for us,”  Ben 
replied.  Ben wondered how he was going to get this job, with Adam needing 
looking after.  He had been hired several times, but when each of them, had 
found out about Adam, Ben lost the jobs.  He needed to find work to feed his 
son.  He didn’t care about himself, just his little boy.
 
Later that morning, Adam woke up, shaking his father awake.  “What, what do 
you want Adam?” Ben asked sleepily.
 
“I’m free today Pa.  I’m free years old.  I’m a big boy now.  I can help you 
make money,” Adam replied.
 
Ben sat up, hugging his son.  “Yes, you are a big boy today.  You are three 
years old.  You’re not a baby anymore, are you?”  Ben asked.
 
No Pa, and I, I go potty now, when I’m posed to,” Adam replied.
 
“Yes, you do, don’t you, because you are a big boy now,” Ben said, poking 
Adam lightly on his chest.  “I’ll tell you what young man.  When we get some 
money, we’ll have a birthday party for you, just the two of us.  I’ll buy 
you a birthday cake, and a present.  How does that sound?”  Ben asked.  Adam 
smiled and replied, “Really?”
 
“Really son,”  Ben said.   Standing up, Ben walked over to the river, to get 
ready for his interview.  Looking at his reflection in the water, he 
couldn’t believe, he was looking at himself.   What would his Elizabeth 
think of him now, if she were alive?  If he hadn’t felt bad enough, he 
looked over at Adam, and wanted to cry.  His clothes worn, and he needed a 
bath, but they had no soap.  His son look thin, and Ben was concerned.  
Except for the fish he had caught, Adam hadn’t eaten anything else in 
awhile.  Ben prayed he’d get this job.  He had to for Adam’s sake.
 
The man, who opened the door to the house, was in his early forties.  Ben 
told the man, he was there for the ranch hand job.  The man looked at Ben 
and Adam, and asked them to come in.  They walked into the kitchen, Adam’s 
hands clutching his father’s pants.  By the stove, the man’s wife, was 
making breakfast.  Ben guessed her to be in her late thirties.  Ben learned, 
the man’s name was John Peters, and his wife was named Sally.  John motioned 
for Ben and Adam to sit at the table.  Adam sat in his father’s lap, his 
face turned against his chest, clinging to him.
 
“Besides being early, you are?”  John asked.
 
“I’m Ben Cartwright, sir,” Ben replied.  John looked down at Adam.  “And who 
might this young man be?”  he asked.  Adam hugged his father tighter.  “This 
is my son, Adam.  He’s a really good boy, and I can assure you that, he 
won’t cause any problems, if I get the job,”  Ben stated.
 
“Mr. Cartwright, how do you intend to work, on this ranch, and watch your 
son?  He’s definitely too young, to be left alone,”  John stated.  Ben 
wanted to get up, right then and there, knowing that he wouldn’t get this 
job either.  “I’m sorry we bothered you,” Ben said, holding Adam in his 
arms, standing.
 
“Ben Cartwright, you sit right back down there, “  Sally said.  “For one 
thing, you and Adam there, look like you could use a good meal.  The other 
thing is, if you work for my husband, I’d be more then happy to watch Adam.” 
  Ben sat down, Adam in his lap. Adam looked at the lady, and smiled.  The 
lady smiled back.  Looking down,  Ben said, “I couldn’t impose on you like 
that.”
 
“Mr. Cartwright, believe me when I say, I’d enjoy every minute of it.  You’d 
be doing me a favor,” Sally replied.
 
“Thank you,” Ben said, looking down at his son.
 
  “I’m hungry Pa,” Adam said.
 
Shhhh,” Ben replied.  Sally looked at the two.  They looked like they 
hadn’t eaten a meal in a long time.  “How do steak, eggs, potatoes and 
biscuits, sound to the two of you?”  Sally asked.
 
“Please ma’am, don’t go to any trouble for me.  I would appreciate your 
feeding my son though.  He hasn’t had much to eat in awhile,” Ben replied.
 
“Looks to me like you’ve had less to eat.  Now just sit there, and I’ll make 
your breakfast, and I’ll hear no more complaints,”  Sally said. John looked 
at Ben, and said, “She’s pushy, but I love her.”
 
When Sally brought the food to the table, Adam clung harder to his father.  
Sally knelt down next to him, and said, “Adam, I’ll bet, that if we move 
this chair, right next to your father’s, then you and your father, could eat 
easier.  What do you think?” Sally asked.  Adam took his face off his 
father’s chest.  He looked at Sally first, then the chair, she had scooted 
against his father’s.  Adam got down, and sat in the other chair.  Sally 
washed Adam’s hands with a washcloth with soap,  then cut up his steak.  
Adam smiled at her.  Ben washed his hands at the sink, Adam keeping his eyes 
on him he whole time.
 
When they had  finished eating, John and Ben went outside, to talk about the 
job, while Adam stayed inside with Sally, while she did the dishes.  Adam 
watched his father leave, then looked at Sally, while still sitting in the 
chair.   “Are you a mommy,” Adam asked.
 
“No, I’m not a mommy.  I wasn’t blessed that way,”  Sally replied.
 
“What’s that mean?”  Adam asked.
 
“Well Adam, sometimes people just can’t have children,” Sally replied.
 
“I had a mommy once.  Her name was Lizbeth.  My Pa said she loved me very 
much.  He said she had to go away.  If my mommy loved me, why’d she go 
away?”  Adam asked sadly.  Sally dried her hands on her apron, and knelt 
down next to him.  Elizabeth is a beautiful name, and I’m sure your mommy 
did love you very much.  Sometimes people have to go away, but they don’t 
want to.  I’ll bet your mommy misses you very much,” Sally replied hugging 
Adam.
 
“Do you think my mommy loves me?”  he asked.
 
“Yes sweetheart.  I know she does,” Sally replied.
 
“I free years old today.  My, my Pa, he told me, someday he’ll buy me a 
berfday cake, and, and a present,” Adam said.
 
“Your birthday is today?”  Sally asked.
 
“Yes,” Adam replied.  Sally got an idea.  Standing up she said, “How would 
like it, if we went into town together, and we could buy you the prettiest 
cake in town.  How would you like that?”  Sally asked.
 
“I don’t like it in town,” Adam replied.  Sally knelt back down next to him. 
  “Why don’t you like it in town sweetheart?”  she asked.
 
“I’m a bad boy. That man in town, said I was.  He said,  I was the reason,  
my Pa can’t get a job. Am I a bad boy?’  Adam asked, tears in his eyes.  
Sally put her arms around him, and replied, “No sweetheart. You are not a 
bad boy.  Not at all.”
 
“My Pa, he can do anything,”  Adam said.
 
“I’m sure he can sweetheart.  Listen, why don’t I give you a bath.  I’ll 
fill up the sink with water, and give you one.  How does that sound?  We 
could change your clothes as well, “ Sally said, looking at the ones he was 
wearing.  Adam looked down, and didn’t’ reply.  Sally realized that the 
torn, and dirty clothes, were probably the only ones he had.  Her heart 
sank.  Sally filled the sink with warm water, and undressed Adam.  She put 
Adam in the sink, and scrubbed him from top to bottom.  When she lifted him 
out, she dried him off, then covered him in a warm blanket.  She just 
couldn’t put those dirty clothes back on him.  She took him into the living 
room, and rocked him to sleep. Sally thought to herself, what a beautiful 
child he was.  That black hair, and brown eyes, the color of amber, and that 
sweet personality.  Her heart ached for Elizabeth, who had missed all of 
this.  She wondered how long Elizabeth had been gone.  She thought about 
Ben, and wondered how long they had lived this way.  Sally stroked the hair 
on Adam’s head, then kissed it.  His little face against her chest, made her 
realize, how much she had missed, by not having her own children.  It’s not 
that she didn’t want any, but it was not meant to be for her and John.
 
Ben and John walked in.  Sally held her finger to her lips, so they wouldn’t 
wake Adam up.  “I just wanted you to know that Ben is going to be working 
for us.  With all he can do with horses, and around a ranch, we’re getting a 
bargain.  I think this man can do anything,”  John said.
 
“So I heard from his son,”  Sally said whispering.  Ben looked at Sally and 
Adam.   Seeing the two of them, he pictured Elizabeth, holding her son. When 
he snapped back into reality, he said, “I see you gave him a much needed 
bath.  I keep my son clean, but we ran out of soap the other day.”
 
“I understand.  I’m glad you will be working for us, and you are more then 
welcome to bathe as well.  John, you’re about Ben’s size.  You have some 
clothes to spare for him, don’t you?”  Sally asked.
 
“By golly you’re right Sarah.  If anything, I have too many clothes. Happens 
when you don’t have children of your own.  Your wife buys clothes for you, 
like you were one of her children,” John said laughing.  Ben laughed, then 
said, “Please, you have both been too kind already. I can’t take your 
clothes,” he said.
 
“Nonsense,” Sally replied.  Ben looked at the two of them.  “Thank you,” he 
replied.
 
“Come here Ben, and I’ll show you where you can take that bath.  Guess I’ll 
have to bring you in the water, seeing that my wife there is in her glory, “ 
John said, looking at Sarah, who had her head on Adam’s.
 
“Ben, before you go, tell me about Adam’s mother.  Adam gives me the 
impression she’s dead,”  Sarah said.
 
“Yes, she is dead,” Ben replied sadly.
 
“How long has she been gone?”  Sally asked.
 
“She died in childbirth,”  Ben stated sadly.
 
“Oh I’m so sorry. Sorry for you. Sorry for Adam, but most of all, sorry for 
Elizabeth,”  she said.  Ben nodded, then followed John.
 
Sarah had to go into town.  She put Adam in bed, and told the men, to check 
on him once in awhile.  She would be back soon.
 
Six hours later, Sally went in to check on Adam, for the umpteenth time, and 
found his eyes open.  She walked over to the bed, and sat down on it.  “Well 
young man, you have been asleep for six hours,”  she said. “You must be very 
hungry.”  Sally looked down at Adam, and realized he had been crying.  
“What’s wrong sweetheart?  Why are you crying?”  she asked.
 
“My Pa can’t buy me a berfday present,”  he replied.
 
“I know honey, but I’m sure he would, if he could,”  Sally replied.
 
“I wish I had a bed to sleep in, and a house,”  Adam said.
 
“I’m sure your Pa wishes that as well Adam,”  Sally replied, trying to hold 
back her tears.
 
“I wish my Pa was happy,” Adam said.
 
“Isn’t your Pa happy?”  She asked.
 
“He cries at night sometimes.  I think he misses my mommy,”  Adam said 
reaching up to feel Sally’s cheek.  “Was my mommy soft like you?” he asked.  
Sally grabbed his hand, and held it to her cheek.  “I would say she was 
Adam,”  she replied.
 
“I don’t have any toys.  Once I had a pet lizard, but he ran away,” Adam 
said.  Sally’s heart ached for this little boy.
 
“I have a grandpa, but I don’t know him.  My Pa tells me stories about him,” 
Adam replied.  Sally was amazed at how smart this child was, and how well he 
spoke, for just turning three.  She knew, if he could get the proper 
education, he could be something very important.  She could  see his 
becoming a doctor.  On top of being so smart, maybe being around an adult 
only, made him that way as well.
 
“Adam, I went into town, but I couldn’t bring myself, to buy you a cake.  I 
had to make you one.  I made you a yellow cake, with chocolate frosting.  I 
hope you’ll like it,”  Sally said.  Adam reached up, and hugged Sally.  “I 
also bought you some new clothes.  Your pants were awfully short.  I’ll go 
get them,” she said, walking out of the room, then coming back in, with the 
new clothes.  “Here, let me help you into them,” she said.
 
Adam got out from under the covers, butt naked.  “I’m a boy,” he said.  
Sally laughed. ‘Yes, I know you are,”  she replied.  Stepping into his 
pants, he said, “My Pa’s a boy too,” Adam said.
 
“Yes I know,” Sally replied.
 
“Did you change his clothes too?”  Adam asked.  Sally laughed.  “No Adam, I 
could just tell he was a boy,”  she replied.
 
“My Pa has hair on his chest, and a scratchy beard,”  Adam stated.
 
“Oh, does he now?”  Sally replied.
 
“Yes, and my Pa said, maybe someday, I will too,”  Adam said. Sally looked 
at the precious little boy, and tried to imagine him grown up, with a 
scratchy beard, and hair on his chest.
 
“My Pa told me, that someday, I’ll be a handsome man,”  Adam stated.  Sally 
trying to keep a straight face replied, “I’m sure your Pa’s right.”
 
“I wish my mommy didn’t die.  Do you think my mommy misses me?”  he asked.  
Sally grabbed him, and held him, and replied, “I’m sure she does miss you 
Adam.”
 
That evening was Adam’s first birthday party ever, and he was so excited 
about having a cake.  He was so excited about blowing out candles.  “What 
did you wish for, son?”  Ben asked.  “I wished for a home,”  Adam replied. 
Ben felt his heart sink.
 
While in town, Sally had bought Adam some birthday gifts.  Adam was so 
excited, as he unwrapped them.  He had gotten some books, blocks, clothes, 
shoes, pajamas, a cup, some candy.   Sally had made him a stuffed dog, out 
of scraps of material, while he slept.  Adam hugged the dog.  “Thank you,” 
he said, hugging Sally.  He ran over to his Pa.  Look Pa, I got a doggie, 
and books, and clothes, and candy, and other things,”  he said.  Ben forced 
himself to smile, feeling as low as he could.
 
“Pa, I’m going to name my doggie Abel, after Grandpa,”  Adam said.  Ben 
smiled.
 
A FEW WEEKS LATER, John and Sally called Ben into the house.  Adam was 
napping at the time.  They all sat around the kitchen table.  “Ben, there’s 
something Sarah, and I, would like to discuss with you.  Now, please hear us 
out Ben, before you reply.  This isn’t easy for either one of us.  Ben, you 
know that we have a nice ranch here, nothing large, but we make a good 
living here.  You know how wonderful Sally has been with Adam, these past 
few weeks, and how much he adores her.  You also know, I’m a good man as 
well.  Well Ben, what I’m trying to say here is, Adam is a smart little boy 
Ben.  He needs a stable home.  Two parents to love him, and care for him.  
It would be a chance for him to go to school, and learn.  He’s so bright 
Ben.  We would treat him, and love him, as if he were our own.  We want you 
to give Adam to us, to raise,”  John said.
 
“Give Adam to you?  Adam is my son.  What would make you even ask such a 
thing?”  Ben asked.
 
“Ben, the boys needs love,”  Sally replied.
 
“I give my son love,”  Ben replied.
 
“Ben, I know you love your son, and that’s why John and I, hoped you would 
take this in the way it’s meant to be taken.  Ben, Adam is getting three 
square a day.  He’s put on weight.  Ben, he’s so happy here.  Could you 
honestly take him away from this, and have him live the way he did, before 
you came here?”  Sally asked.
 
“Ben, he’s the brightest little boy I’ve ever met, and pretty soon, he’ll be 
ready for school.  How is he going to go to school, if he has no roots?” 
John asked.
 
“I can teach my son,”  Ben replied.
 
“Ben, the boy needs a home.  He needs a roof over his head, not the stars.  
He needs protection from the cold, the rain, and the snow.  He needs a soft, 
warm bed to sleep in.  Not a thin blanket, laid upon the cold, hard ground, 
to freeze, or for bugs to bite him.  Ben, I know this is a shock to you, but 
think of what’s best for Adam.  Do it for the love of Adam,”  Sarah said.
 
Ben wanted to take Adam, and run, but there was truth in their words.  “I 
need to think about this,” he said standing.
 
“Ben, if the boy is to stay with us, then I think it best, that you leave 
tomorrow, and never come back,”  John said, looking down. “I’ll give you 
enough money to tide you over, until you can get another job.  I’ll also 
give you a good reference,”  he said.
 
Ben walked into the room, Adam and he had been occupying, these past weeks.  
He looked down at his sleeping son. Ben was torn.  He wanted to keep his 
son, but he also knew, maybe he was being selfish.  Maybe they were right, 
and going out of Adam’s life, would be the best thing for him. How could he 
make his son, go back to the way they had lived, before coming here.  Nights 
when Adam couldn’t sleep, because he was so hungry.    Ben kissed the top of 
Adam’s head.  Tears in his eyes, he looked at his son, for the last time.  
Looking up, he said, “Please, forgive me Elizabeth.”
 
Adam was still sitting forward in the blue chair, but he now had  tears in 
his eyes.   “Do you remember me now Adam?”  Sally asked. Adam wiped his 
eyes.  “I do some.  I remember the dog you made me, and the books.  I kind 
of remember the blocks.  I also remember missing my father,”  he replied.
 
“Yes, you did.  You cried for him, for those few weeks.  One day, your 
father came back, and he told us, he couldn’t live without you.  He had no 
purpose for living anymore, without his son.  He handed us back, every 
single penny we had given him, and took you, and we never heard from him 
again.  I heard of a Ben Cartwright, who lived here, and I took a chance, 
and wrote to him.  It was the same man, and I asked his permission to come 
see you.  You were the closest thing I ever had to a son, and I never 
stopped loving you, all these years.  I should have realized, that he  
couldn’t life without you.  I want you to know, it was our love for you, 
that made John and I ask for you.  We would have been good parents to you, 
but we forgot one thing,”  Sally said.
 
“What’s that?”  Adam asked.
 
“You were the only thing, your father had left, of Elizabeth, and their 
love, except for his memories.  The other we learned,  was that your father 
loved you, and couldn’t live without you.  When he took you away, I thought 
I’d die inside, but in time I realized, he did the right thing.  You needed 
him, as much, as he needed you.  I can’t say  I didn’t worry about you 
though, because I did.  Many a night, John and I wondered, what ever 
happened to the two of you.  Those months with you, were the happiest of my 
life,”  Sally said.
 
Adam walked over to where she sat, kneeling in front of her.  Taking her 
hand, he said, “Thank you for loving me, enough to give me back to my 
father.  You could have fought him for custody of me, and more then likely, 
you would have won, but I would have lost.  My father is the most wonderful 
father, any son could ask for.  I can’t tell you how proud I am of him, and 
how proud I am, to call him my father.  I can’t tell you, how proud I am, to 
be his son,”  Adam said. Tears came to Sarah’s eyes.  “It doesn’t mean I’m 
not grateful, to you and John, for what you did for me.  I assume John is no 
longer alive, or he would be here with you,”  Adam said.
 
“John died a year ago, and I just couldn’t sit in that lonely house anymore. 
  I thought about you, and wanted to see you again,”  she replied.  Still 
holding her hand, Adam said, “I’m sorry to hear about John.”  Sarah nodded 
her head.   She looked at Adam.  She felt his face, with her free hand.  
“You have a scratchy beard.”  She looked down.  “I also see, you got your 
hair chest,”  she said.  Adam looked at her, blushing.
 
“Adam, your father picked me up at the stage, and brought me out here, but 
you knew that already, didn’t you?”  Sally asked.  Adam stood. “Uh huh,”  he 
replied.  Sally stood as well. She looked at Adam again.  “You are the man I 
envisioned, that John and I, would have raised you to be,”  she said.  She 
put her hand to his face.  “You look the same Adam.  You’re older, but your 
features are the same.  My little boy,”  she said, tears falling down her 
face. “What a handsome man you are,” she said.  Tears in his eyes, Adam 
hugged her.  After a few moments, Sally walked towards the front door. She 
turned, and said, “Your father filled me in on your life, on the way out 
here.  I’m sorry for all the death you have had to endure.”
 
“Sally?”  Adam called. “Where will you go now?”  he asked.
 
“I’m going to go to San Francisco, and live with my niece.  Your father 
tells me, that you go there quite often on business.  If I write, and send 
you my address, will you visit me?”  Sally asked.
 
“Yes,”  Adam replied.
 
Her hand on the doorknob, Sally opened the door.
 
“Sally, thank you,”  Adam said.
 
Sally walked outside.  Ben walked in, and walked over to his son.  “Joe is 
taking Sally back into town,”  he said. Adam faced the fireplace, not 
looking at his father.  “I can only imagine, what you must think of me right 
now.  A father, who could leave his child like that.  I only hope, that 
someday, you can forgive me.  You have to understand son, I did it, because 
I loved you, and not for selfish reasons.  Things were different for us back 
then.  I don’t know if you remember that or not, but they were.  I never 
bought you that birthday gift, I had promised you,”  Ben said.
 
“You gave me a birthday gift,”  Adam replied.  “Don’t you remember?”  Ben 
shook his head.  “You gave me my mother’s book, the one she got my name 
from,  and you read to me every night from it.  You told me, if brought her 
closer to us,”  Adam said.
 
“I’d forgotten that.  You’re right,”  Ben said.  Adam turned, looking at his 
father.  “I love you Pa,”  Adam said, as he hugged his father.  “I love you 
too Adam.  What I did back then, I did, for the love of you, Adam,”  Ben 
replied.
 
 
A FEW MONTHS LATER Adam got a letter from Sally’s niece, telling him of 
Sally’s passing.  Adam felt like he had lost someone special to him.  He was 
glad he had gotten the opportunity to visit with her in San Francisco, and 
more importantly, at The Ponderosa.  He remembered being three, and laying 
in that bed, and how he reached up, and felt her cheek.  How soft she was, 
and how he had never felt a woman’s skin before that.  How he wondered if 
his mother felt that way.  Sally was the first woman, to show him, what a 
mother’s love was like.  He’d never forget her.
 
THE END

 

 

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