NEVER TOO OLD
by
Lynne C

For all his brave talk, the one thing that Little Joe hated more than
anything else, was knowing that his father was disappointed in him,
and this was one of those times. The young man couldn't bring himself
to look his father in the eye, even though he knew that Ben expected
it of him. Joe was scared, yes, that was the only word to describe the
churning in the pit of his stomach, as he thought about what he would
see, if he looked into those normally, loving, chocolate brown eyes.

"I'm really sorry, Pa," was all he could manage to say, and he knew,
before the words were out of his mouth, just how inadequate they
sounded. "Things just got outta hand, I guess, and before I knew it,
Adam was hurt."

Ben had spent the time, since the doctor had left, pacing up and down
the large, comfortable, main room of the Ponderosa ranch house, unable
to settle to anything. He was feeling slightly calmer, now, than he
was at the start of the whole incident, mainly because Paul Martin,
one of his oldest friends, and the family's trusted physician, had
delivered the news that Adam was going to be all right.

"It was a nasty injury, Ben, but Hoss worked fast and saved Adam from
it being even more serious than it was. I've got a couple of calls to
make, fairly close by, but I'll pop in again, before I return to town.
However, as long as Adam obeys my instructions, I can't see there
being any complications."

"Thanks, Paul," said Ben, clasping the doctor warmly, by the hand. "It
was lucky that you were on the way out here, to check on Jake's bad
arm, when Dave caught up with you."

"Well, I think that did help, too, the speed in which I was able to
treat Adam, but Hoss was the one, who was on hand, as soon as the
accident happened, and so he did the most to alleviate the damage."

"Yes, he did," said Ben. "Thank goodness that one of my sons was
showing some good sense," and Ben stared at Joe, as he said this,
making the boy wish he could just disappear.

After the doctor left, and Ben had assured himself, once more, that
Adam was sleeping peacefully, Hoss, who had elected to sit with his
brother, encouraged his father to go and talk to Joe.

"Now would be a good time, sure enough, Pa," said Hoss. "Adam's fine
and I'll stay with him, `til you git back. Ya cain't leave Joe
frettin' like that, it ain't fair to the young `un."

"And how fair was Joseph being to his brother, when he disobeyed my
orders and did something as stupid as he did?" shouted Ben, causing
Adam to stir in his sleep.

"Ssh, Pa, keep ya voice down, don't wake Adam up. Doc Martin said the
best thing fer him is rest, and iffen he stays asleep, he's less
likely to do hisself any more damage, by tryin' ta git up too soon. Ya
know what a bad patient he is?"

"Sorry," said Ben, whispering, this time. "All you boys are bad
patients, and always have been. Yes, I guess you're right, I should go
and talk to Joseph. When this first happened, I think if I'd got my
hands on him then, I would've thrashed him to within an inch of his
life, so it was best that I kept my distance, for a while. But I
cannot continue to ignore him, can I?"

"No, Pa, ya cain't," said Hoss. "He knows, better than any of us, that
he's done wrong, but ya still need ta talk things through with him."

Ben patted Hoss on the back and, after taking one more look at his
eldest, and gently wiping Adam's brow, with a damp cloth, he made his
way , down the stairs.

Little Joe was still in the main room, but was now curled up on Adam's
favourite armchair, the high backed, blue velvet one, which resided
next to the gun rack. The young man, even though he was eighteen
years old, always looked a lot younger than his years. But now,
looking down on his son, as he descended the stairs, Ben was taken
back to the time they'd lost Joe's mother, when the boy was only just
five years old. Joe was crying, in fact, sobbing more accurately
described what he was doing, but trying to keep the noise to a
minimum, by burying his face into his shoulder, and the wing of the chair.

Even though Ben was still extremely angry with what Joe had done, his
heart went out to the boy, when he could see just how upset Joe was.

As Ben arrived at the side of the chair, he reached out and touched
the boy on the arm, causing Joe to flinch.

"It's all right, son, it's just me," said Ben. "I thought you'd want
to know that Adam is sleeping now, and seems to be fairly comfortable."

Joe jumped up, wiping at his eyes, with his hands, as he did so.

"May I go and sit with him, sir?:"

"In a few minutes you may, but first I think you and I need to talk,
don't we?"

Joe nodded and tried to swallow the huge lump, forming in his throat,
before he replied.

"Yes, sir, I suppose we do, though I'm not sure what I can say to make
this whole mess seem any better. Everything that happened was totally
my fault. I disobeyed you and Adam and, by doing so, nearly got Adam
killed.. Whatever you plan to do to me, won't be anywhere near as bad,
as I feel I deserve."

Ben said nothing, for a few minutes, and resumed his pacing up and
down the room. Joe stood watching his father, and wishing that Ben
would just get on with punishing him, as the waiting was getting to be
more than the young man could bear.

Ben suddenly stopped pacing, and said, "And what do you think I should
do to you?"

The question rather took Joe by surprise. Since the accident, Joe had
been expecting his father to drag him across to the barn and take a
razor strop to him, not that Ben ever had, but what he'd done, was
much worse than the kind of mischief he'd been tanned for, in the past.

"Erm, I kinda expected you to give me a thrashing, sir," said Joe,
when he could find his voice.

"It's been at least a year, or even more, since I've resorted to using
that type of punishment on you, Joseph, and I don't see that it's
necessary, now. I must admit that when this first happened, the
thought did cross my mind, but I think you are past the age when a
tanning solves all. Before I left for my meeting, this morning, I
handed out the list of chores to be done, and I gave you strict
instructions to stay away from the horses that were in the north
corral, as both Adam and I thought they were too wild for you to
handle, yet. Now, whether you agreed or not, didn't matter. I am your
boss and Adam is my second in command and we both told you not to
touch those horses. You had enough to do, with the ones in the south
corral. But, you decided to ignore our advice and, while Adam and Hoss
were doing something else, you sneaked into the corral, and tried to
break a horse, which was beyond your capabilities. As was expected,
the horse threw you, and before you were able to get out of its way,
it was about to stomp you into the ground. If it hadn't been for the
quick thinking of your brother, it would now be you upstairs in bed,
probably with even more severe injuries than Adam has received. But,
he managed to distract the horse, giving you time to get out of the
corral, and, fortunately, he only sustained a couple of broken ribs,
when the horse slammed itself against him, forcing him into the fence.
Then it was Hoss' turn to play the hero and he got Adam out of there,
without any further injury. But none of it would have been necessary,
if you'd done as you were told to do, and stayed away. No, a tanning
isn't the answer, this time. You're going to have to find your own way
of proving to Adam and to me that you really are sorry for what you
did, is that understood?"

Joe was still finding it hard to look at his father, and hearing his
crimes spoken aloud, didn't make it any easier, but he took a deep
breath, and looked up. What he saw, almost made him cry, again. His
father was looking at him, but there was no reproach, only love, in
his eyes.

"I hope you know that I speak the truth, Pa, when I say that I am
truly sorry for disobeying you and Adam, and I would never set out to
hurt my brothers, or you, deliberately. It was an accident, but one I
know that could have been avoided, if only I'd done as I was told. I
will try and make it up to you all, and I'll do as many of Adam's
chores as I can, while he's unable to work, and anything else that you
ask me to do, until you feel that I am ready to move on to more
difficult chores."

Ben appeared to be pondering on this, for a while, and then he said,
"Mmm, that sounds like a good start to making amends, son. I also
think you should appoint yourself as Adam's slave, until he is able to
get out of bed. That means taking trays up to him, to save Hop Sing's
legs, and helping him with washing and dressing, and entertaining him
by reading to him, or playing checkers, if he feels up to it. Do you
think you can do all that?"

"Of course I can, and I'll be glad to do it," said Joe. "After all,
Adam saved my life. May I go up and sit with him, now?"

"Yes, you may, Joseph, but before you do, I'd like you to do one more
thing for me."

"What's that, Pa?"

"Come and give me a hug, as I'm still shaking from the thought of what
might have happened. That is, if you don't think you're too big to
give your old father a hug, anymore?"

Joe ran into Ben's arms, proving to his father that he was unlikely
ever to think he was too old to show his Pa how much he loved him.

THE END
Little Joe forever
Lynne
October 19th 2006

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