" Little Joe talks To God "
By: Lynne G.
" Hi ya God it's me Little Joe. I thought I better tell ya my name cuz it's dark in my room and I dunt think ya can see me," the little boy began.
" I have tried ta be a good boy, but seems like I've been a naughty boy taday. Papa said I was naughty, but I dunt think I was."
" I fink thats I needs ta 'splain my day ta ya just incase ya wasn't watchin' me."
" Ya see, Papa was gone all day. I fink he needed ta do stuff in town. Hoss was at school, but he dunt like it none. Me either and I dunt even go ta school yet."
" Adam had ta go and fix some fences that keep on gettin' busted. Dunt know why they always gotta gets busted all the time, but they does."
" I wanted ta go wiv Papa ta town, buts he tolded me thats I gotta stay home wiv Hop Sing. Gee, I thought that Hop Sing was big 'nough ta stay home by himself."
" I tolded Papa that ain't fair thats I gotta stay home, but he saided that I's was naughty fer not listenin's ta him. Am I naughty God?"
" Hop Sing dunt tolded me ta play outside and be a good boy, and not make a big mess in the house. Me make a mess? I dunt fink so, cuz I'm a good boy."
" I dun like Hop Sing tolded me, and I played outside, but he gotts mad at me cuz I gotts all dirty and wet from playin' in the water trough wiv my boats. I tried ta tell him that ya have ta gets dirty when ya play in the yard, but he dunt fink so. He dun tolded me me I was a bad boy."
" I wanted ta make cookies, but after I tried ta make cake batter fer Hop Sing, I ain't 'spose ta make no food no more."
" I maded some mud cookies and I puts some hay in em ta make em look better."
"I know thats ya gotta puts cookies on cookie sheets when ya puts em in the oven. Not the kinda sheets that ya puts on beds, but the kind ya puts cookies on."
" I snucked inta the kitchen ta gets one of Hop Sing's cookie sheets and I puts my cookies on it. After I put them cookies on them sheets, I dun snucked back in the kitchen and I puts em in the oven. Then I wents back outside ta play."
" How was I ta know that Hop Sing was gonna make cookies too. I could hear him yellin' so loud that I thoughted that the house was gonna fall over !"
" Hop Sing ran outside wiv his cookie sheet that had my cookies on it. My cookies looked kinda funny, and they dunts smell so good neither."
" Hop Sing was really mad at me and he smacked my butt. Then he had ta wash his cookie sheet. I tolded him that's I was sorry, but he gave me a funny look and tolded me ta stay outside and play. Then he mumbled in Chinese, and I had ta laugh at what he saided. He saided that ' little boy not use brain.' Huh !"
" I wented ta play wiv my boats again when Nemo stood up up on his back legs and he dun took my boat in his mouth and he ran off wiv my boat."
" I had ta run after him to gets my boat back, but he went runnin' through Hop Sing's garden. He runs ta fast fer me ta gets him."
" Hop Sing sawed me runnin' in his garden and he gotts mad ats me and he comed after me and he smacked my little butt again. It's all Nemo's fault, not mine !"
" I dunt fink Hop Sing likes me no more God. I tolded him I was sorry and that it was all Nemo's fault, cuz it was Nemo's fault !"
" Nemo dropped my boat in the dirt and he wented on mouse duty wiv Rusty, Sam and Kitty. They sure gets lots of mouses. Papa saided that is very good. He dunt like mouses, but I like mouses cuz they's cute."
I had ta wash my boat cuz it gotts dirty, and then I puts it in the barn, and I wented ta play on my swing."
" Then I was a bad boy cuz I wented in the pig pen and rolled in the mud wiv the pigs. I love ta roll in the mud and it's fun ta roll in too. I was havin' so much fun and I wasn't in no one's way either. Then Papa comed home."
" Did ya see that look on Papa's face when he saw me all covered in mud? I fink he was gonna cry."
" It was fun when Papa chased me all over the yard, but he dunt fink it was fun, cuz he was yellin' ats me. Then Adam and Hoss comed home and they chased me too, and that was fun. I dunt fink they wanted ta touch me cuz I was covered in mud."
" Papa caughted me and he took my clothes off me outside. When he wasn't lookin', I dun took off runnin' and went down ta the creek ta play. Then Papa, Adam and Hoss comed after me."
" So I gotts in the water and dunt wanna comed out. The water ain't that deep in summer, so I can play in the water. Papa dunt wanna comed in the water, so he yelled ats me ta gets out of that water. He sure can yell loud. Did ya hear him God?"
" I gotts out of the water on the other side of the creek and I ran inta the woods. It's just a good thing that I still had my boots on, but they dun gotts water in em."
" I could still hear Papa yellin's ats me and he weren't too happy wiv me, cuz I dunt have no clothes on. There ain't nuffin' wrong goin' wivout clothes, 'sides clothes just gets dirty, and I like ta feel the air on me when I ain't gotts clothes on."
" I fink I was in big trouble cuz I was scared ta come back across the creek. Dunt wanna gets ta close ta Papa er my big brothers, cuz ya know what Papa was gonna do ta me."
" Uh oh, Adam dun took his boots off and his socks and his shirt and he wented inta the water ta gets me, so I dun took off runnin' again. Dunt wanna gets captured !"
" I was gigglin' cuz Adam kept yellin' " ouch " cuz he ain't gotts no boots on. Uh oh, he dun gotts me and he was mad ats me and he smacked my butt wiv his hand. My poor butt has seen ta much action taday."
" I tolded Adam he was naughty cuz he smacked my butt and he gotts his pants all wet. I tried ta smack his butt, but he held me under his arm and I couldn't gets ta his butt."
" He carried me back across the creek. I sawed Papa standin' there wiv his hands on his hips and that ain't a good sight. When Adam puts me on the ground, Papa reached fer me, but I took off runnin' as fast as I could towards the barn and I runned up ta the hayloft. My kitties were up there too."
" I was so sleepy from playin' so hard, I laid down in the loft and I puts my fum in my mouth and I fink I falled ta sleep, cuz when I woke up, I was in my bed."
" Papa tolded me that's I was a very naughty boy taday. He tolded me that's I needed ta ask ya ta fergive me fer bein' naughty. Do ya fergive me God? I promise ta be a good boy tamorrow."
The next day :
" Hi God, it's me, Little Joe again. I thought that I was a good boy taday cuz Papa and Hop Sing tolded me not ta gets my clothes dirty, so I took em off when I did my chores and played, but I dun lefted my boots. See, now my clothes would stay clean. What a good idea that was, right?"
" Papa wasn't happy wiv me again fer goin' 'round wivout clothes on. I dun tolded him ta try it cuz he just might like ta feel the air on his skin too, but dunt wanted ta."
" Papa then tolded me that he was gonna tie my clothes ta me. Uh oh, I hope not cuz how would I be able ta pee if'n my clothes was tied ta me ? Bet he dunt fink of that."
" I decided ta hide all my clothes in the hayloft. Then I tolded Papa that all my clothes wented away, and that ain't no lie, cuz they did go away and I helped em go away, but I dunt say nuffin' 'bout that. Papa putted his hands over his face and I fink he was cryin'."
" I wented outside ta play when Sheriff Coffee comed fer a visit and he asked me why I dunt have no clothes on and I tolded him that they all wented away. He smiled at me and started ta laugh. I tolded him that he should take his clothes off too, but his face gotts all red, and he shooked his head."
" Hoss, wented and founded my clothes, and he gotts me dressed again. He tolded me that people dunt go 'round naked. I asked him why we take our clothes off when we go swimmin' in the lake or the creek ?"
" He tolded me that that was was different cuz ya can't swim in yer clothes, but I have. So I asked Papa the same question and he saided the same thing Hoss did. It sure dunt make no sense ta me."
" So God, do ya fink I was a bad boy taday? I thought that I was good, but I will try even harder tamorrow ta be good."
The next day:
" It's me again God. How is ya taday? Did ya see how busy I was taday? I worked so hard fillin' up all the wood boxes in the house and that made Papa and Hop Sing happy."
" Please God, ya just gotta do somethin' 'bout that dumb old rooster though. He ain't very nice when he chases me when I get the eggs fer Hop Sing. I keep tellin' Hop Sing that he needs ta cook that old rooster, but he saided he can't cuz that rooster needs ta purtected them hens."
" Well God, I just wanted ta tell ya that I was a good boy taday. Have ya fergiven me fer bein' naughty yesterday? I sure hope so."
" Night, night God. Sleep real good now. I's luv ya."
The End