To Sing For His Supper
by
Lynne C.

For the first time in two weeks, Joe finally felt clean. He was lying
in a tub of hot water, in the public bathhouse at Springfield. This
was the nearest town to the railhead, where they had delivered the
cattle, which they had driven from the Ponderosa. As a joke, Adam had
just thrown a rubber duck at his youngest brother, but instead of
being offended by the gesture, Joe began to sing to it.

"Rubber ducky, you're the one
You make bath time lots of fun
Rubber ducky, I'm awfully fond of you"*

"Oh boy, little brother," said Hoss, from the tub next to Joe's. "Do
ya havta keep singin'? It jest ain't your thing."

"That's rich, coming from you," said Joe. "You can't carry a tune to
save your life."

"I know I cain't and that's why I don't try to," said Hoss. "But you
seem ta have the idea that what comes outta your mouth is pleasant on
the ear, and it jest ain't, shortshanks. Tell him, Adam."

Their oldest brother was in the bathtub, the other side of Joe, and he
took his time to back what Hoss had said, but back it, he did.

"Hoss is right, little buddy. You have many talents, but singing isn't
one of them. Take it from one who has received professional lessons,
you would die of starvation, if you tried to make a living out of that
voice."

Joe ignored the pleas of his two brothers and carried on singing,
until Adam could stand it no longer. He got out of the tub, went over
to his little brother and pushed his head under the water. The young
man soon came up, spluttering and using words that would have earned
him a date with a bar of soap, if his father had heard them. But,
luckily for Joe, Ben was back at the ranch, having sent his three sons
on the cattle drive, without him, this time.

The boys took their time, but eventually decided they were clean
enough to be let loose among the human race, again. They all put on a
fresh set of clothes and headed for the nearest saloon.

As they waited at the bar, to be served, Hoss said, "I reckon I've
jest lost about eight pounds of dust, from the outside of ma body, and
once I've downed a couple of beers, I'll have washed another few
pounds of it, from the inside."

Joe laughed and then ordered the beers, as it was his turn to pay.
Once they were all holding a glass of beer, they found a table and sat
at it, looking round the room, as they did so, to see who their
companions for the evening were. The men who had been on the drive
with them had already been paid off and were on their way to their
next job, so there weren't any familiar faces to be spotted. However,
there were some rather good looking girls and Joe soon made eye
contact with a cute blonde, who was wearing a bright red dress, which
showed off her body to perfection. After a few glances at each other,
Joe indicated that he wanted to buy her a drink. She nodded and so he
got up, in readiness to join her.

"With a bit of luck, brothers, I won't see you until the morning," he
said, and made to go.

"Hold on, big shorty," said Hoss. "Pa made us promise ta keep a close
eye on you, before he agreed to you comin' along on this drive, with
us. How can we do that, iffen you disappear with a gal?"

"Ease up a bit, Hoss," said Adam, surprising Joe, who had expected the
objection to him leaving, to come from his oldest brother. "Joe's
nearly eighteen, now, and he's worked really hard on this drive,
proving himself to be a man you can rely on, in a crisis. I think he
deserves a bit of fun, so let him go. You know where we are staying,
Joe, make sure you are back in time for breakfast, okay?"

"Thanks, Adam, I will be," said Joe, patting his brother on the back,
as he left the table.

"Take care," said Hoss, obviously not happy that the boy was going.

Joe reached the girl, who was sitting at another table, and leant down
to ask her what she wanted to drink.

"My name's Joe, what can I get you?"

"Whisky, please, and I'm Carrie."

Joe went over to the bar and ordered himself another beer, and a
whisky for the lady. He didn't drink spirits, himself, as the only
time he'd tried them, he'd been very ill, and had also suffered from a
trip to the barn, as he'd only been sixteen at the time, and his
father was most definitely not amused.

He took the drinks back to Carrie, aware that his brothers were still
watching him, but he chose to ignore them. `They'll never stop wanting
to look out for me,' he thought, but he wasn't really that annoyed, as
he knew it was only because they cared about him.

However, as the evening progressed, and both Adam and Hoss also found
themselves some female company, Joe ceased to notice his brothers. He
found Carrie to be a most lively companion and they had several
dances, together, when a four-piece band took up residence, on a tiny
stage, in the corner of the saloon.

Joe had downed several beers, and was now feeling bold enough to ask
Carrie if she was prepared to spend the night with him.

As they shuffled round the rather crowded dance floor, he said, "I
really like you, Carrie, and I would be honoured if you'd let me spend
the night with you. I've been on the trail for a couple of weeks and a
man gets lonely and has needs, if you know what I mean?"

"Oh, yes, I know what you mean, Joe," she said. "Us women have those
needs, too, even though men don't think we do. But, although I work in
a saloon, I don't let every man I meet come back to my place, with me.
I am a lot more selective than that, and I always make a rather
unusual request of a man, when I'm planning to share my bed with him."

Joe wasn't sure what she meant by this, but the thought excited him.

"Just tell me what you want me to do, and I'll do it," said Joe.

She pulled him closer, so that she could whisper in his ear.

"I want you to go and serenade me, with the band, up there, on the stage."

Joe, at first, paled, at the thought; his brothers' words about his
awful singing, coming back to taunt him. But then, the alcohol he'd
consumed gave him a confidence boost, and so he agreed to do it.

He made his way through the crowd and arrived at the stage. He caught
the attention of the leader of the band, and made his request. The man
smiled and was happy for Joe to join him. There wasn't much room on
the stage, but Joe managed to fit on, and he suggested a song to the
band members, who began to play it.

As Joe began to sing, the volume of noise in the saloon started to
decrease, as, one by one, people stopped talking and focused their
attention on the person who was ruining one of the favourite cowboy
songs, of the time, The Streets of Laredo.

Joe, buoyed up by the alcohol, and the thought of how Carrie was going
to reward him, continued to sing, until one cowboy yelled out, "Enough
already, who trapped that cat's tail under the rocking chair?"

This made some people laugh, but the majority of the audience was
beginning to turn nasty. Joe suddenly felt something hit him on the
side of the face, it was an overripe tomato. More missiles followed,
and Joe lost his temper, launching himself off the stage, and into the
middle of the crowd.

Adam and Hoss saw what was happening and made their excuses to the
ladies, who they were sitting with.

"Excuse us, but we have a little brother's hide to go and rescue,"
said Adam.

The two brothers waded in, and managed to drag Little Joe out of the
fray, without him sustaining too many injuries. However, his face was
badly cut and bruised, as were his knuckles, where they'd made contact
with a few jaws.

When they got outside and Hoss was able to assess the damage to Joe's
face, he insisted that they returned to their hotel room, despite
Joe's pleas to be allowed back into the saloon, to find Carrie.

"You need some doctorin', shortshanks," he said, and he wouldn't take
no for an answer.

Hoss took him to their hotel and Adam went to fetch the doctor. Joe
needed some stitches in a cut over his eye, and Adam remarked that it
was a good job he'd had a few drinks, as it meant he was pretty much
immune to the pain, as the doctor stitched him up.

After the doctor left, Joe began to get undressed. He realised that
there was something in his jacket pocket and as he put his hand
inside, it made contact with something soft and wet. He took his hand
out of the pocket and found that he was holding the tomato, which had
hit him in the face. Despite being upset about missing out on a night
with Carrie, Joe began to laugh.

"What's so funny?" said Adam, grumpily, as he was also cross about
having to leave his girl.

"You know what you said about me starving to death, if I ever tried to
make a living out of singing? Well, you were wrong, brother. Look,
someone gave me a tomato, so I won't starve, after all."

THE END
Little Joe forever
Lynne
June 16th 2006
* From Sesame Street

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